Show Diary

2006-03-20

20 March 2006: Dating Mistakes and Answerphone Messages

Scott examines the worst things people do when trying to impress someone they fancy, working through a series of cringeworthy answerphone messages left by listeners attempting to chat people up.

2006-03-20

20 March 2006: Insurance Call Sketch

Scott stands in for Grimmy on BBC Radio 1 Breakfast with a chaotic insurance phone call sketch, where a caller repeatedly gets struck by lightning while trying to buy cover for a week-long trip to Lesbos.

2006-03-20

20 March 2006: Laura’s Diary with Sister Mary

Laura’s sister Mary joins the show to talk about an upcoming gig, before reading an extraordinarily confusing and chaotic entry from Laura’s old diary dating back to 1997.

2006-03-21

21 March 2006: The Honesty Game Special Edition

The team play an extended Honesty Game with callers asking increasingly personal questions about naked encounters with fellow DJs, using fame to chat people up, and embarrassing one-night stands — with plenty of memorable revelations and laughs along the way.

2006-03-21

21 March 2006: Mary’s Diary Reading

Scott and the team read another instalment from listener Mary’s teenage diary, this time from November 1997, dealing with friendship drama and a difficult conversation with her friend Ben.

2006-03-22

22 March 2006: The Honesty Experiment and the Ten Pound Chase

Scott and the team conduct an experiment to test public honesty by dropping money in the street, then embark on a comedic stakeout to confront one man who kept the cash instead of returning it.

2006-03-22

22 March 2006: Laura’s Diary – Teenage Heartbreak

Scott and the team read an emotional entry from Laura’s diary, where the then-teenager describes being dumped by her boyfriend Ben via letter during her A-levels—and it hits all the dramatic beats of teenage relationship meltdown.

2006-03-23

23 March 2006: David Beckham Soccer Academy Event with Gary Neville

Scott’s team heads to the David Beckham Soccer Academy in East London for a celebrity football tournament, where Gary Neville captains the Radio 1 side against other England footballers in a series of increasingly ridiculous inflatable challenges.

2006-03-23

23 March 2006: Laura’s Diary Season 4 Finale with Ben

The season finale of Laura’s Diary features a surprise guest: Ben, Laura’s ex-boyfriend from Season 4, who’s flown in to discuss their relationship and relive some of the diary’s most memorable moments.

2006-03-27

27 March 2006: Can You Really Silence a Restaurant?

Scott sends Laura into a busy Southampton restaurant to test whether you can actually make everyone go silent by saying something shocking — just like in the films — by having listeners text in suggestions for what she should say.

2006-03-27

27 March 2006: Karen’s Song Request and the Private Line Mix-up

A caller named Karen reaches Scott on his private line requesting a song for her mum, but Scott’s exasperation at repeated breaches of his personal number leads to an increasingly absurd negotiation as he tries to contain the damage.

2006-03-28

28 March 2006: Finding Laura – Auditions Tour Begins in Southampton

The Scott Mills team hit the road on a tour bus to hold X-Factor-style auditions across five cities, searching for a boyfriend for Laura, a researcher on the show who hasn’t had much luck in love. Highlights from the Southampton auditions reveal an eccentric mix of candidates—from poetry-reading oddities to overeager hopefuls.

2006-03-29

29 March 2006: One Night with Laura – Cardiff Auditions

Scott and the team hit the road in a touring format, hunting for Laura’s dream boyfriend through X Factor-style auditions held across the country. This Cardiff episode introduces the memorable candidates — including Gary, Joseph with his striking half-bleached mullet, and the poetry-loving Tim — while Scott watches Arsenal play Juventus under the table and gets fired from the judging panel for his lack of focus.

2006-03-30

30 March 2006: Danny Howard’s Search for Laura’s Perfect Match

Danny Howard takes over the show to present an X-Factor-style dating competition, holding auditions across the country to find the perfect boyfriend for Laura, who works on his show. The Nottingham auditions feature an unforgettable parade of hopefuls with increasingly bizarre talents and skills.

2006-03-31

31 March 2006: One Night with Laura Tour Bus Auditions

Danny Howard presents highlights from the Scott Mills Show’s nationwide “One Night with Laura” tour bus, hunting for Laura’s ideal boyfriend across Southampton, Cardiff, Nottingham, Newcastle and Glasgow — featuring peculiar talents like Big Norm, who somehow produces music by slapping his head and manipulating his ear.

2006-04-04

4 April 2006: One Night with Laura Finalist Shep Grilled Over Secret Girlfriend

Scott confronts Shep, one of three finalists competing to win a date with Laura, after discovering he’s been in a relationship with a woman from Málaga since September — something Shep had failed to mention when entering the competition.

2006-04-06

6 April 2006: Ben’s Speed Dating Revelations and Criminal Past

Ben, one of the three finalists in the “One Night with Laura” competition, is grilled about his surprising secrets — including an accordion-playing skill, a tendency to stand at attention during the national anthem, and a memorable drunken incident that led to an accidental burglary charge.

2006-04-10

10 April 2006: Laura’s Paris Date with Gareth

Laura from the Scott Mills Show finally gets her romantic moment after listeners voted Gareth from Somerset as the winner of a competition to be her new boyfriend — and the pair flew to Paris to find out if love was in the air.

2006-04-11

11 April 2006: Chappers Campaigns for Jo Whiley International Airport

Chappers rings UK airports to persuade them to rename themselves after Jo Whiley, with surprising success at Blackpool International, whose marketing department actually agrees to raise the proposal at a board meeting.

2006-04-12

12 April 2006: Laura Wakes Up the Flatmate from Hell with Rammstein

Laura is sent on a revenge mission to wake up a listener’s inconsiderate flatmate using loud German industrial metal, armed with permission and a megaphone.

2006-04-13

13 April 2006: Chappers’ Meal or No Meal Game

Chappers debuts a blindfolded food-tasting game where Scott and Laura must pick unlabeled tins and eat their contents — with one tin containing dog food instead of a proper meal.

2006-04-14

14 April 2006: Laura’s Date with Gareth, Waking the Flatmate, and Chappers’ Food Game

A bumper edition of the week’s best moments, featuring the aftermath of Laura’s blind-date trip to Disneyland Paris with listener-voted companion Gareth, a rude awakening prank on an inconsiderate flatmate, and Chappers’ blindfolded food guessing game where dog food is on the menu.

2006-04-18

18 April 2006: Placenta Recipes and Meal or No Meal

Scott explores the surprisingly common practice of eating placenta after childbirth, taking calls from listeners with their own stories, before another round of the show’s signature Meal or No Meal game turns messy when Laura discovers she’s been eating dog food and actually enjoys it.

2006-04-19

19 April 2006: Jordan’s Radio 1 Day and Laura’s Love Life Revealed

Jordan, the beneficiary of a random act of kindness back in December, visits Radio 1 for the day — and Scott springs a surprise on him. Plus, Scott finally reveals what really happened between Laura, Gareth, and James from One Night with Laura.

2006-04-20

20 April 2006: The Honesty Game – Team Grievances in the Dark

Scott, Chappers, and Laura air their frustrations with each other in a dimly lit “safe zone” session, revealing the small but accumulating annoyances that have built up during weeks of intense working together.

2006-04-24

24 April 2006: Scott’s Arrested for Home Shopping Channel Debt

Scott pulls an elaborate prank on his mum, calling to say he’s been arrested for not paying for an exercise machine from a home shopping channel — and remarkably, she falls for it, even when a “policeman” joins the call with increasingly absurd additional charges.

2006-04-25

25 April 2006: Calling Toilet Door Numbers and Fooling Mum Again

Scott continues his investigation into mystery phone numbers found written on pub toilet doors, calling up confused strangers to ask what services they’re advertising — with predictably awkward results. He also attempts to fool his gullible mum for a second time.

2006-04-26

26 April 2006: Flirt Divert – Snakes, Barry, Hoodies, and Mums

Another edition of the Flirt Divert feature, where unsuspecting callers leave messages for people they think they’ve dated — only to discover they’ve rung the Scott Mills Show instead. This time around, there are large snakes involved, Big Barry gets a mention, someone’s desperately trying to shift a van full of hoodies, and Scott reminds listeners once again: please stop giving this number to your mums.

2006-04-27

27 April 2006: Rachel Busts Boyfriend Graham on Dating Website

Scott helps Rachel expose her boyfriend Graham, who claimed to have quit internet dating but was secretly still active on a dating site — and had even been on a date with someone else.

2006-04-28

28 April 2006: Sophie and Laura Meet Hilary Duff at Concert and Interview

Two massive Hilary Duff fans – Sophie and Laura, who works on the show – go to a Hilary Duff concert together, and Laura secures a backstage interview that becomes increasingly uncomfortable as her questions veer from flattery into invitation-to-stay-at-my-house territory.

2006-05-02

2 May 2006: Inside Celebrity Homes – Duncan James, Louise Redknapp and Dame Judi Dench

Scott invites listeners working in service industries to call in and reveal what they’ve discovered inside celebrity homes during routine jobs—launching what he jokingly dubs a “cribs correspondent” scheme with wonderfully indiscreet results.

2006-05-03

3 May 2006: Westwood’s Secret Brokeback Mountain Obsession

Scott discovers in Heat magazine that Tim Westwood’s favourite film is Brokeback Mountain — and decides to imagine what that looks like for the notoriously macho DJ.

2006-05-04

4 May 2006: Would You Dump Your Girlfriend for Danni Minogue?

Scott and the team set up a relationship test, getting Danni Minogue to call David live on air and invite him to a barbecue — all while his girlfriend Beccy listens in to see if he’ll cheat.

2006-05-08

8 May 2006: Mike the Decorator Snoops Around Liz Allwood’s House (Live)

A painter and decorator called Mike is invited to secretly snoop around a celebrity’s house and report back on-air — but the celebrity is actually listening the whole time, and things escalate in wildly uncomfortable directions.

2006-05-09

9 May 2006: Sony Award Win and Tired & Emotional Flashbacks

Scott celebrates winning a Sony Radio Award this week while revisiting a memorably hungover broadcast from the morning after the 2003 Brit Awards — complete with stories of hotel room chaos and having to be physically awakened by his producer.

2006-05-22

22 May 2006: Laura’s World Cup Song Translation Disaster

Laura uses an online translator to ring people across Europe and ask about their World Cup songs — but the translation software has given her some spectacularly inappropriate phrases to say instead.

2006-05-23

23 May 2006: What Fish Am I?

Chappers unveils his latest game show format: a blindfolded Scott has to identify fish by touch and cryptic clues, with the prize of taking them home for tea.

2006-05-30

30 May 2006: Lorraine Kelly’s Revenge Prank on Bros Fan’s Best Friend

Julia finally gets her comeuppance 18 years after her best friend Jess sent her a cruel April Fool’s letter claiming she’d won a chance to meet Bros — with help from Lorraine Kelly and a fake GMTV game show.

2006-05-31

31 May 2006: Chappers Pranks Scott’s Mum Into Celebrity X Factor

Chappers calls Scott’s famously gullible mum Sandra with an elaborate hoax: she’s been selected to appear on Celebrity X Factor and perform “I’ve Got You Babe” with Scott, who’s supposedly standing in for an ill Chris Moyles.

2006-06-05

5 June 2006: Scott’s Mum Gets Her Revenge

After weeks of Scott winding up his notoriously gullible mum on air, she finally gets her revenge with an elaborate wind-up involving a fake BBC press office call threatening to expose a scandal.

2006-06-06

6 June 2006: The Sugababes Call a Record Store Prank

The Sugababes are in the studio to help pull off a practical joke — Keisha calls a record shop and tries to get the staff to recommend their own album without revealing who she is.

2006-06-07

7 June 2006: Laura’s Self-Help Tape Prank Call

Laura’s been working through Susan Jeffers self-help cassettes, and Scott decides to test how a Scarborough amusement arcade reacts when he plays clips from them down the phone.

2006-06-09

9 June 2006: David Walliams Channel Swim Training and Lloyd’s World Cup Tips

David Walliams drops by to discuss his Channel swim training for Sport Relief, and Scott gets crash-course football knowledge from 10-year-old expert Lloyd ahead of the World Cup — while Lloyd takes the opportunity to ask Laura about her brother’s embarrassing secret.

2006-06-12

12 June 2006: Flirt Divert Best Bits and Does Your Boyfriend Love Football More Than You?

A highlights show featuring the best calls from the Flirt Divert feature, plus a live phone challenge to test whether a girlfriend’s boyfriend really does love football more than her.

2006-06-13

13 June 2006: Lloyd’s World Cup Facts and Pub Challenge

Lloyd, the 10-year-old football expert from an earlier feature, returns to set Scott a challenge: use the World Cup facts he’s taught him to start conversations with complete strangers in a pub.

2006-06-14

14 June 2006: World Cup Widows (Reversed)

Scott tackles the “World Cup widows” phenomenon during the 2006 tournament — but with a twist, when a caller reveals he’s the one being abandoned while his girlfriend Sarah spends all her time in the pub watching football instead.

2006-06-20

20 June 2006: The German Hotel Prank

Scott calls a helpful German hotel receptionist claiming to need a real-time translation for an interview with a German footballer’s wife — but the “wife” is just Scott playing audio clips, and the phrases he asks translated become increasingly ridiculous and crude.

2006-06-21

21 June 2006: The Most Offensive Phrase in German

Scott discovers what he believes is the most offensive phrase in the German language and puts it to the test by calling random businesses across Germany to see their reactions.

2006-06-27

27 June 2006: Paris Hilton in Studio, Laura’s Impersonation, and Lloyd’s Questions

Paris Hilton visited the Radio 1 studio to discuss her music career and endured the chaos of unprecedented paparazzi attention outside Broadcasting House — but the real highlight was Scott revealing Laura’s successful street impersonation of the heiress to Paris herself.

2006-06-28

28 June 2006: Jo Whiley Prank Call to Electrical Shop

Scott orchestrates an elaborate revenge prank on an electrical retailer that left listener Graham on hold for three weeks, impersonating Jo Whiley’s personal assistant and attempting to sell the shop 14 LCD screens.

2006-06-29

29 June 2006: Laura’s Cringe Interview with Danny McFly

Laura, a devoted McFly fan, finally gets her long-awaited one-on-one with Danny, but the encounter rapidly descends into mortifying territory as she asks increasingly bold questions — culminating in an unforgettable moment that left everyone wincing.

2006-07-11

11 July 2006: Lloyd Confuses an Estate Agent

Lloyd, the show’s World Cup expert, makes a triumphant return by popular demand after listeners’ outcry the previous day — this time deployed as a “weapon of mass confusion” to bewilder an unsuspecting estate agent.

2006-07-14

14 July 2006: Lloyd Complains to a Shop About Frosties

Mini mischief-maker Lloyd is back to cause chaos, this time calling a convenience store with a bizarre complaint about Frosties cereal and its irritating TV advert jingle.

2006-07-18

18 July 2006: Orson’s Cat Confession and Lloyd Calls an Exclusive Hotel

Orson deliver a brutally honest singing telegram to confess a five-year-old hit-and-run involving a cat, while ten-year-old Lloyd continues his campaign of bewildering phone calls to unsuspecting businesses — this time targeting one of the world’s most exclusive hotels.

2006-07-19

19 July 2006: Nikki from Big Brother 7

Nikki from Big Brother 7 visited the studio for an interview with Scott, and the show played her a prank call featuring clips from her Big Brother diary room entries.

2006-07-20

20 July 2006: Orson Sings Lloyd’s Car Dreams and James’s Boss Resignation

Lloyd returns with another chaotic phone call—this time asking a bewildered Audi dealer about sports cars with flames—while Orson delivers a brilliant singing telegram to James’s exploitative pub boss Bernard, demanding back pay and resignation on his behalf.

2006-07-21

21 July 2006: Claire Proposes to David with Orson’s Help

In the final instalment of Orson’s week-long song-based confession series, a listener called Claire uses the band to propose marriage to her boyfriend David — live on air, with no pressure whatsoever.

2006-07-24

24 July 2006: Robbie Williams Calls In About “Rudebox”

Robbie Williams rings Scott from Berlin to discuss his new single “Rudebox” and defend his decision to let Scott play it early on Friday — much to the annoyance of other radio stations.

2006-07-25

25 July 2006: Lloyd’s Liverpool FC Kit Launch Interviews

Lloyd reports live from Anfield, where he attended the launch of Liverpool FC’s new Adidas kit and conducted interviews with several of the players — armed with some characteristically odd questions that managed to surprise even the professionals.

2006-07-26

26 July 2006: Janet Jackson Interview with Chappers’ Wardrobe Malfunction Prank

Scott interviews pop icon Janet Jackson, and the team decides to lighten the mood by staging a cheeky wardrobe malfunction stunt with Chappers halfway through the chat.

2006-07-27

27 July 2006: Shannon’s All Clear – Update on Brain Tumour Survivor

A joyful update on Shannon, the eight-year-old girl who Scott surprised with McFly after her brain tumour diagnosis. Her godfather Paul rings in with brilliant news: Shannon has finished treatment and been given the all clear by doctors.

2006-07-31

31 July 2006: Flirt Divert Messages from the Weekend

Scott and the team play back a selection of Flirt Divert messages left over the weekend, featuring awkward chat-up attempts, failed impressions, and relationship drama — including one caller trying to make up with his girlfriend after an uninvited guest incident.

2006-08-01

1 August 2006: The Baby Mindreader TV Discovery

Scott discovers “The Baby Mindreader,” a genuinely baffling TV show in which a camp psychic called Derek claims to read the minds of babies to diagnose their emotional and behavioural problems — and the results are hilariously dubious.

2006-08-02

2 August 2006: Chappers Plays Classic Clips

With Scott Mills away, Chappers takes over and revisits some of the show’s most memorable moments, including the legendary Glasgow University names call and the infamous Pizza Guy prank calls.

2006-08-04

4 August 2006: Two Takeaway Shops Phone Prank

Scott orchestrates chaos by getting two rival takeaway shops to take orders from each other, resulting in mounting confusion and a brilliantly tangled phone exchange.

2006-08-08

8 August 2006: The Darren Dating Disaster and Flirt Divert Stories

Scott and the team dissect an outrageous American dating story about a man named Darren who demands $50 from his date Joanne after she doesn’t call him back — complete with voicemails, threats of legal action, and a restaurant manager getting involved.

2006-08-09

9 August 2006: Chappers Interviews R ‘n’ B Singer Lola

Chappers conducts a cheeky interview with R ‘n’ B singer Lola about her track “No Strings,” which is being played heavily on Radio 1 — and things get increasingly flirty and flustered as the questioning progresses.

2006-08-10

10 August 2006: Vernon Kay’s Imposter Brother and the Darren Date Voicemail Saga

A classic Mills prank catches someone claiming to be Vernon Kay’s brother, while a rejected date story spawns a full song about demanding reimbursement for dinner.

2006-08-11

11 August 2006: Jesse Metcalf Interview and Gardening Job Call

Actor Jesse Metcalf, best known as John the gardener from Desperate Housewives and star of the new film John Tucker Must Die, visits the show—and Scott persuades him to call up and apply for an actual gardening job.

2006-08-14

14 August 2006: Laura Becomes a Bathroom Valet in a Dingy Pub

Laura ventures into a run-down pub toilet to pose as a bathroom valet, armed with styling products and deodorant, to see if she can make money from unsuspecting punters in one of the least glamorous locations possible.

2006-08-15

15 August 2006: The On Hold Game & Backdoor Love Returns

Scott revisits two of the show’s most popular features: a brilliantly tedious prank call to a credit card company’s customer service line, and the triumphant discovery of Erick Mount, the Spanish singer behind the cult novelty song “Backdoor Love,” who is tracked down live on air.

2006-08-16

16 August 2006: Busting a Fake Coming Out and The Takeaway Game

Scott confronts a boyfriend who faked being gay to escape a relationship, and the phone lines light up with listeners sharing their own ridiculous breakup excuses — before things get delightfully chaotic on The Takeaway Game.

2006-08-17

17 August 2006: The Man Who Faked His Own Death and Lloyd’s Triumphant Return

A bumper compilation featuring one of the show’s most outrageous caller stories — a man who faked his own death to escape an unwanted romantic connection — plus the hugely popular return of Lloyd, the 10-year-old football expert.

2006-08-21

21 August 2006: The I Love You Game with a Twist

Scott plays a cunning version of the I Love You Game where a caller named Tom tries to get his sister-in-law Claire to say “I love you”—but Claire’s been primed in advance to flirt outrageously, leaving Tom convinced she’s genuinely coming on to him until the reveal.

2006-08-22

22 August 2006: Laura the Vigilante Gets Steven Home for Tea

Laura takes to the streets as a self-appointed social vigilante to tackle a pressing domestic injustice: a 15-year-old boy who’s persistently late for his family’s six o’clock dinner.

2006-08-23

23 August 2006: Natalie’s Embarrassing Toilet Story

A listener called Natalie shares one of the most mortifying stories the show had heard in ages — involving an unfortunate bathroom situation at a new boyfriend’s house, a plastic bag, and a note left on the kitchen table.

2006-08-24

24 August 2006: Scott’s Mum Gets Revenge with Jo Whiley and Radio 1 Management

Scott’s mum finally got her own back after weeks of Scott winding her up with gullible pranks, enlisting help from his Radio 1 boss and Jo Whiley to construct an elaborate fake scandal designed to make Scott squirm.

2006-08-25

25 August 2006: Laura’s Internet Translator World Cup Song Disaster

Laura attempts to ring up people across Europe to find out about their World Cup songs — but armed only with an internet translator, the results are hilariously garbled and mortifying.

2006-08-29

29 August 2006: Two Takeaways Prank

Scott’s classic two-restaurant confusion prank, where he calls one takeaway, takes their order, then connects them to a second restaurant on the line — resulting in complete chaos over an aromatic duck that nobody wants to cook.

2006-08-30

30 August 2006: Mike the Decorator Gets Caught Snooping in Liz McClarnon’s House

Scott has a listener snooping around a mystery celebrity’s house doing painting and decorating work — but the catch is the celebrity herself is listening in the whole time, and she’s about to have some fun with what he’s willing to do.

2006-08-31

31 August 2006: Chappers Intercepts Song Requests with Jay Goodman and Westwood

Chappers spends the afternoon intercepting callers trying to request songs, playing them clips of Jay Goodman and putting them through to Westwood instead of the studio team — much to their confusion and annoyance.

2006-09-01

1 September 2006: Laura’s Woopy Cushion Library Challenge

Scott sends Laura into a public library armed only with a whoopee cushion, tasking her to get thrown out using the classic fart gag — but the librarians prove remarkably unfazed by her efforts.

2006-09-05

5 September 2006: Laura Tests Chloe’s Boyfriend

Laura hits the streets to test whether Chloe’s boyfriend is really the reformed ladies’ man he claims to be, or if he’ll fall for her advances in the pub. After a comedic false start with the wrong man, she finally tracks down the right target.

2006-09-06

6 September 2006: Egg On Your Face with Chapper

Chapper introduces a gloriously messy new game show format where Scott and Laura take turns smashing eggs on their heads — with only four hard-boiled eggs mixed in among two raw ones.

2006-09-07

7 September 2006: Baby Mind Reader Derek Ogilvie Reads Riley’s Mind Live on Air

Derek Ogilvie, the baby mind reader from Channel 5’s TV series, visits the studio to demonstrate his claimed psychic abilities — and Scott brings in a real 14-month-old to test whether he can genuinely read an infant’s thoughts live on Radio 1.

2006-09-08

8 September 2006: Jo Whiley at Blackpool Pleasure Beach with The Killers

Jo Whiley braves the rides at Blackpool Pleasure Beach in pursuit of The Killers, with Scott Mills on hand to document her screams, nerves, and genuine fear on the roller coaster.

2006-09-11

11 September 2006: Flirt Divert Messages and Jo Whiley Pranks

Scott and the team work through a fresh batch of Flirt Divert messages, featuring an angry woman whose clothes have gone missing and a confusing domestic dispute involving a dog and a mysterious caller named Monica.

2006-09-12

12 September 2006: The Hoff Plans Scott’s Funeral

David Hasselhoff rings in to help Scott plan his own funeral, complete with donated teeth, electrical preservation ideas, and a custom Elton John tribute.

2006-09-13

13 September 2006: Unofficial Mills Banzai Poll and Team Gossip

Scott directs listeners to the Unofficial Mills fan site’s version of Banzai, a poll asking what will happen next on the show — with options ranging from Scott moving to Radio 2 to Chapman getting struck by lightning.

2006-09-15

15 September 2006: Scott’s Gullible Mum Compilation Special

A best-of collection of the show’s most successful wind-ups of Scott’s mum, spanning several weeks of elaborate phone hoaxes — from fake arrests to broken car parts to a Celebrity X-Factor appearance.

2006-09-18

18 September 2006: Flirt Divert Highlights and Dancing on Ice Denial

Scott clears down the Flirt Divert line with the weekend’s best attempts to chat up potential dates, then addresses tabloid rumours about him appearing on Dancing on Ice.

2006-09-20

20 September 2006: Chappers Calls Demi Moore

Chappers reveals he’s obtained the mobile phone number of a genuine A-list Hollywood celebrity and calls them live on air — leading to one of the show’s most audacious “A-List: Who the Hell Are You?” games yet.

2006-09-21

21 September 2006: Simon’s Psycho Ex and the Threatening Jumper Messages

A caller named Simon has been receiving increasingly unhinged voicemails from his ex-girlfriend “Emma” and her father after a brief one-date relationship, culminating in a genuinely disturbing message that sounds like she’s cutting up his jumper with scissors.

2006-09-22

22 September 2006: Flirt Divert and Jo Whiley Gets Mardy

Scott Mills is filling in for Grimmy on Breakfast with a bumper Flirt Divert feature, complete with hilariously garbled voicemail messages — and Laura’s speculative baby names cause chaos with the unofficial fan site.

2006-09-26

26 September 2006: Chris the Medium and the “Text a Dead Person” Service

Scott and the team launch a bizarre new feature called “Text the Dead” with visiting spirit medium Chris, fielding questions for listeners’ deceased relatives — including a granddad famous for blaming his farts on the dog, and a Scottish grandmother’s cluty dumpling recipe gone wrong.

2006-09-27

27 September 2006: USA to Z Funny Names and Random Acts of Kindness

Scott and the team call people with genuinely unfortunate names from the American phone book, enjoying the awkward moment when callers have to confirm their own surnames down the phone — plus proper mean Random Acts of Kindness.

2006-09-28

28 September 2006: American Phone Book Game with Ben D Wanger and Harry Minge

Chappers hosts the American Phone Book Game, calling up unfortunate souls with amusing names from US directories—this time connecting with Ben D Wanger and Harry Minge, much to everyone’s delight.

2006-09-29

29 September 2006: American Phone Book Game and Clubbing Mishaps

Scott runs the American Phone Book Game featuring people with unfortunate surnames, before moving into a hilarious discussion about accidentally chatting up someone’s mum at a nightclub.

2006-10-02

2 October 2006: David Hasselhoff Interview

David Hasselhoff visits the show to answer the questions fans really want to know — including whether he waxes or shaves — and unexpectedly offers Scott a role in his musical.

2006-10-03

3 October 2006: Missing Adult Magazines and Voicemail Flirting

A caller’s hidden magazine collection has mysteriously vanished from under his bedroom floorboards, leading to an awkward mystery involving his girlfriend and her mother — while the team dissects some hilariously misguided voicemail flirtation attempts.

2006-10-04

4 October 2006: Mystery Voicemail Girl and Ice T’s Rap School

Daniel from the team has been receiving mysterious voicemails from a girl he doesn’t know, and Scott attempts to solve the mystery with listener help — while also reviewing the brilliantly odd MTV show Ice T’s Rap School, featuring a 15-year-old ginger kid named Dodge.

2006-10-05

5 October 2006: Jo Gets Saucy and the Young Noise Challenge

Scott tricks Jo Whiley into recording herself saying “I can’t wait to make love to you” and then plays the clip to unsuspecting Radio 1 colleagues, while the team tests whether listeners can actually hear the infamous “Young Noise” ringtone that supposedly only young people detect.

2006-10-06

6 October 2006: Magnus the Danny Howard Daily Lookalike

Scott speaks to Magnus Ramsey from Belfast, who’s been mobbed by locals convinced he’s a Danny Howard Daily doppelgänger after getting laser eye surgery — and has even been confirmed as a lookalike by the man himself at a Dublin book signing.

2006-10-10

10 October 2006: Recruitment Agency Voicemail Payback

A recruitment consultant accidentally leaves his phone recording after hanging up, capturing him calling a job applicant a pervert—and Chappers rings him back to confront him with hilarious results.

2006-10-12

12 October 2006: The Honesty Game, Making Celebrity Friends, and Where Were You Conceived?

Scott opens the show with the Honesty Game, where listeners can ask the team anything and get truthful answers, while also introducing a new feature aimed at making lonely celebrities into unlikely friends.

2006-10-13

13 October 2006: Florist Messages and Mystery Phone Numbers

Scott tests how far florists will go when asked to write outrageous messages on flower cards, then helps a suspicious girlfriend investigate a mysterious woman’s phone number found in her boyfriend’s jeans pocket.

2006-10-16

16 October 2006: Laura’s Diary Season 5 Final and American Phone Book Game

Laura’s Diary returns for its final season, with Mary reading entries from 1998 when Ben unexpectedly came back into Laura’s life after dumping her by letter — and the show plays the American phone book game, phoning unsuspecting Americans with unusual surnames.

2006-10-17

17 October 2006: Laura’s Diary Part 2 – Ben’s New Girlfriend and a Confession to Dad

The final season of Laura’s Diary continues with Laura coming face to face with Ben’s new girlfriend at a night out, and making an awkward confession to her father about smoking — while Mary reads out the entries and shares family stories about Christmas traditions and their dad’s hypocrisy.

2006-10-18

18 October 2006: Laura’s Diary Final, American Names Game, and Hoffmania

The final season of Laura’s Diary concludes with a crisis: Laura discovers Ben calling out another girl’s name in his sleep, sparking relationship panic. The show also features ridiculous American phone book names and another round of the absurdist Hoffmania quiz.

2006-10-19

19 October 2006: Laura’s Diary Season 5 and the US Phone Book Game

Laura’s Diary returns for a fifth instalment as she considers confronting her boyfriend Ben, while Scott and the team continue their hunt for amusing names in the American phone book — with hilariously awkward results.

2006-10-23

23 October 2006: Billie on Ex-Boyfriends and Fresh Knickers

Billie joins the show to discuss ex-boyfriends and personal hygiene tips, while a series of answerphone messages from listeners—including one from a caller’s grandmother—provide the usual comedy gold.

2006-10-24

24 October 2006: Scott’s Bathroom Mishap and Laura’s Letter to Mel C

Scott accidentally recorded himself using the toilet on a live microphone while filming for a charity show, and the team reads out an embarrassingly earnest letter 18-year-old Laura once wrote to Mel C asking for relationship advice.

2006-10-25

25 October 2006: Laura’s Diary – Devil Messages and a Poem of Pain

Laura’s emotional diary continues as she deals with her boyfriend Ben saying another girl’s name in his sleep, leading to a deeply felt (if occasionally clumsy) poem about jealousy, heartbreak, and the fear of losing him.

2006-10-26

26 October 2006: Laura’s Diary Finale, McFly Prank, and Scott’s Mystery Bottom Drawer

The final instalment of Laura’s diary sees her scheming to sabotage her friend’s relationship, plus Scott pulls off a wind-up on McFly’s Harry Judd, and there’s an ongoing mystery about what’s lurking in Scott’s bottom drawer.

2006-10-27

27 October 2006: Laura’s Diary Finale and Mel C Surprise

The final episode of Laura’s Diary sees the heartbroken teenager finally meet her hero Mel C from the Spice Girls, delivering an emotional and triumphant conclusion to the year-long feature that gripped Radio 1 listeners.

2006-10-31

31 October 2006: Guess the Growler and Flirt Divert Special

Halloween 2006 brought voicemail games, celebrity gossip, and an Amy Winehouse interview fresh from the MOBO Awards, where she heckled Bono alongside her dad.

2006-11-01

1 November 2006: Stuart’s Snooker Tournament Dumping

A caller reveals he dumped his girlfriend at a trick-shot snooker tournament because she refused to clap enthusiastically enough for his favourite player Alan Robby – and Scott and the team help him unpick the logic of his decision.

2006-11-02

2 November 2006: The Lapdancing Club, Stuart’s Love Life, and K-Fed’s Rap Dreams

A Cheshire lapdancing club’s broken CD player forces the dancers to endure Radio 1’s conversation instead of music, while Stuart shares disastrous relationship stories and Scott weighs up Kevin Federline’s chances as a rapper.

2006-11-03

3 November 2006: Buckfast, Tanning Addicts and Wedding Bridesmaids

A chaotic mix of Scottish drinking culture, obsessive sun-seekers, and a frank debate about bridesmaids’ body shapes — all prompted by a hilariously incomprehensible drunk Scotsman phoning an American hotel.

2006-11-06

6 November 2006: Scott and Michelle from The Apprentice, Flirt Divert and Daniel from Majestic Cinema

Scott is confronted on air about kissing Michelle from The Apprentice at a karaoke night, leading to the introduction of a new listener feature called Flirt Divert—a wind-up phone number disguised as a way to avoid unwanted flirts.

2006-11-07

7 November 2006: Stuart’s Apple Day Adventure and the Posh Noise

Stuart recounts taking his American friend from Houston to an Apple Day festival on a tandem bike, where she mistook it for a concert by singer Fiona Apple; later, Radio 1’s poshest listeners Hattie and Tatsi call in to discuss the alarming discovery of a fork being used to fish hair out of the bath.

2006-11-08

8 November 2006: Screech from Saved by the Bell Visits

Dustin Diamond, best known as Samuel “Screech” Powers from the 1990s American teen sitcom Saved by the Bell, visits the show for his first trip to the UK — and the conversation quickly turns to an adult sex tape that’s emerged online featuring the actor and his friends.

2006-11-10

10 November 2006: Jamiroquai’s Jay Kay Assesses Scott’s Nissan Micra

Jay Kay from Jamiroquai drops in to critique Scott’s notoriously terrible Nissan Micra, and the conversation ranges from his impressive car collection and rejected Toyota Yaris advert to observations about celebrity photographers, lingerie, and kneeboots.

2006-11-13

13 November 2006: Nelly Furtado on Chart Show Live and Trashing Hotel Rooms

Nelly Furtado joins Scott to talk about her upcoming appearance at Chart Show Live, but the conversation quickly turns to the rock-and-roll lifestyle — including her admitted habit of trashing hotel rooms with her toddler in tow.

2006-11-14

14 November 2006: Children in Need Chaos with Beyoncé and a Disastrous Haircut

Scott attempts to cut hair for Children in Need but annoys the trainee hairdresser, while Coxy conducts video interviews with major stars including Beyoncé—and accidentally offends her by asking about Jay-Z’s music videos.

2006-11-15

15 November 2006: Lloyd’s Nativity Disappointment and Chopper on Weakest Link

Lloyd is devastated to discover he’s been cast as a non-speaking king holding a mirror in his school nativity play, while Chopper heads off to film Celebrity Weakest Link with Dave against the Chuckle Brothers—and calls in with updates from the green room.

2006-11-16

16 November 2006: Danny Howard’s Celebrity Scissorhands Disaster

Danny Howard’s appearance on Celebrity Scissorhands for Children in Need goes badly wrong when a colonic irrigation machine malfunctions during live filming, leaving him shaken enough to need a cup of tea and a half-hour sit-down to recover.

2006-11-17

17 November 2006: Steve Strange Clarifies, Jay Wins Sugababes Trip

Steve Strange pays a farewell visit to clarify his sensitive nature, while Scott arranges a surprise trip to meet Sugababes for Jay, a 13-year-old grieving the recent loss of her mother to cancer.

2006-11-20

20 November 2006: Jay Meets the Sugababes

Listener Jay, who’s had a difficult year after her mother’s recent death, calls in to share her experience of Scott’s random act of kindness — a surprise meeting with the Sugababes at their studio.

2006-11-21

21 November 2006: Matt Willis on I’m a Celebrity and New Music

Matt Willis visits the show fresh from the Australian jungle, discussing his surprising turnaround on I’m a Celebrity Get Me Out of Here and his new music release.

2006-11-22

22 November 2006: The Honesty Game with Colin Murray and Aled Jones

Scott, Chappers, Colin Murray and Aled Jones from the breakfast show play the Honesty Game, answering brutally frank questions from listeners about their most embarrassing moments and secrets.

2006-11-23

23 November 2006: Andy Murray’s Hair Makeover and the Ex-Boyfriend Letters

Scott secures the green light (repeatedly) from an irritatingly enthusiastic PR person to cut Andy Murray’s hair for Children in Need, while a caller grapples with finding his girlfriend’s box of love letters from an ex.

2006-11-24

24 November 2006: Scott Cuts Andy Murray’s Hair for Children in Need

Scott takes on the role of celebrity stylist to cut young tennis star Andy Murray’s hair as a Children in Need fundraiser, attempting his signature Rachel from Friends haircut on the modest 18-year-old British player with mixed results and plenty of nervous chat.

2006-11-27

27 November 2006: Scott’s TV News Debut and Casualty Appearance

Scott Mills makes it onto the BBC News after helping cut Andy Murray’s hair for Children in Need, and reveals he’s also making his acting debut on Casualty — all in the same week.

2006-11-28

28 November 2006: Rate My Listener Guessing Game with Chloe Goes Wrong

With Scott away, the boys attempt their usual Rate My Listener guessing game with Chloe from Essex, but things quickly derail when she refuses to play along with their usual format — she’s an accountant, not a pole dancer, and she’s determined to stay honest about it.

2006-11-29

29 November 2006: Things to Do Before You Die

Scott presents his listeners’ bucket list ideas, ranging from the mundane to the absurd—including scuba diving at the Great Barrier Reef, an intimate night with Girls Aloud, and being shot out of a cannon.

2006-11-30

30 November 2006: How to Kiss Properly with VideoJug Tutorials

Scott discovers VideoJug.com, a tutorial website with step-by-step guides for everything from tying ties to kissing, and decides to walk the listeners through the surprisingly detailed instructions on how to snog someone passionately.

2006-12-01

1 December 2006: JK and Joel’s Useful Tutorials and I’m a Celebrity Boob Job Analysis

JK and Joel bring their usual blend of useful life advice and cheeky observations, discussing everything from how to pull on public transport to spotting cosmetic surgery on I’m A Celebrity, plus discovering the tutorial website VideoJug.

2006-12-04

4 December 2006: Jo Whiley’s Live Lounge Week Wrap-Up

Jo Whiley wraps up her brilliant week hosting The Live Lounge tour with highlights including Noel Gallagher, while the show continues its running gag about celebrity cosmetic surgery.

2006-12-06

6 December 2006: Fancy Dress Beginning with S, and Steven Seagal at the Swan Theatre High Wycombe

Scott’s got a fancy dress dilemma for his football club’s Christmas party — everything must start with the letter S — and discovers that action hero Steven Seagal is touring the UK with his blues rock band Thunderbox, playing High Wycombe on Valentine’s Day.

2006-12-08

8 December 2006: Best of Moils Podcast Special

A pre-recorded Best of Moils podcast special heavy on silly features and absurdist comedy, featuring a mock Cameron Diaz interview, David Beckham answering quickfire questions, and Comedy Dave receiving celebratory messages for ten years at BBC Radio 1.

2006-12-12

12 December 2006: Roller Coaster Club and Celebrity Height Drama

Stuart returns as Scott’s guest, bringing stories of roller coaster appreciation, a breakaway club after ejection from the original, and the ongoing mystery of why certain celebrities seem obsessed with height-based comedy material.

2006-12-13

13 December 2006: El Chombo and “El Chacarrón” Interview

Scott welcomes El Chombo and Andy (the singer behind the viral reggaeton hit “El Chacarrón”) to the studio, along with a lively round of the Honesty Game where the team reveal some deeply personal details about their toilet habits and relationship insecurities.

2006-12-15

15 December 2006: University Carol Challenge and the Pogues’ Christmas Song

Scott puts a university to the test to see if they can sing any Christmas carol on request — including The Pogues’ famously tricky festive hit.

2006-12-18

18 December 2006: Santa Calls Naughty Child Joly

Scott and the team revive their annual feature where Santa calls up children who’ve been misbehaving, to get them back on the straight and narrow before Christmas Day.

2006-12-19

19 December 2006: The Honesty Game and Santa’s Phone Call

Scott and the team play the Honesty Game, where listeners call in to ask deeply personal questions that must be answered truthfully, while Santa makes a cheeky phone call to five-year-old Zara about her Christmas behaviour.

2006-12-20

20 December 2006: Santa Calls Davis, Play Your Christmas Cards Correctly, and Best Bits of 2006

A festive edition featuring Santa’s call to a naughty child, a Christmas party ticket game, the eternal mince pie joke debate, and a compilation of 2006’s most memorable moments including Buckfast Boy and the legendary angry pizza man.

2006-12-21

21 December 2006: Santa Calls Davis, Christmas Cards, and Best Bits of 2006

A festive edition packed with Santa phoning a naughty child, a round of Play Our Christmas Cards Correctly, the perennially popular mince pie joke, and a compilation of 2006’s standout moments including Buckfast Boy and the notorious angry pizza guy.

2007-01-04

4 January 2007: Detox vs Retox, ITV Rip-Off, and Unwanted Christmas Presents

Scott returns from the festive break feeling rough, launching a tongue-in-cheek “Retox” campaign throughout the week while casually destroying unwanted Christmas presents on air — and discovers ITV has essentially stolen the show’s brand-new game format within 24 hours.

2007-01-05

5 January 2007: Viral Text Messages and Gaydar Challenge

Scott and the team attempt to create their own viral text message to rival the “eight angels” and “thump hard” chain messages that went around Christmas, and Chappers takes a gaydar test to see how well he can spot whether callers are gay or straight.

2007-01-08

8 January 2007: Darts at Lakeside and Hannah Montana’s Mystery Double

Scott is booked to play darts at Lakeside with Bobby George, and the team discuss embarrassing airplane songs, Britney Spears’ health scare, and a bizarre Hannah Montana concert moment that’s gone viral on YouTube.

2007-01-08

8 January 2007: The Gay Dot Game and Chain Text Experiment

Scott launches a social experiment with a chain text to see how far it spreads across listeners, and plays the “Gay Dot” game — a feature designed to challenge stereotypes about sexuality based on listeners’ answers to random preference questions.

2007-01-09

9 January 2007: “I Love You” Text Roulette and Barry Island Paintings

Scott launches the “I Love You” text game, where listeners blind-text “I love you” to a random contact in their phone book—with predictably awkward results—and takes a call from a caller who accidentally commissioned a black and white painting of Welsh footballer Barry Island instead of Scarface.

2007-01-11

11 January 2007: Laura Quits Smoking, Self-Help CDs, and DJ Chat-Up Lines

Laura, a member of the show’s production team, reaches day seven of quitting smoking — and the whole show has a betting pool running on when her body will react. Meanwhile, Scott and the team discover the world of Susan Jeffers self-help audiobooks, and gift Scott a rather optimistic CD called “Bay Magnet” designed to improve his pulling power.

2007-01-11

11 January 2007: “You’ve Been Busted” and The Honesty Game

Katie rings in to confess she found 11 private photos of Emmerdale’s Myleene Klass in a bikini on her dad’s laptop—and Scott’s team call her father Doug at work to confront him live on air in a hilarious sting that ends with an unexpected thank you.

2007-01-12

12 January 2007: Text Race, Love Confessions, and Natalie Imbruglia’s Party

Scott triumphs in an elaborate texting prank, Gemma accidentally says “I love you” to her three-day boyfriend via the blind text game, and Scott reveals a mortifying story about a radio DJ being sick at Natalie Imbruglia’s party.

2007-01-15

15 January 2007: Scott’s Teenage Radio Archives and Early Interviews

Scott digs into his own embarrassing archive from his Power FM days at 16, playing back cringeworthy recordings of himself as a young music journalist interviewing a hopeful pop singer named Steve Paris.

2007-01-15

15 January 2007: Pushing In Front of the Queue Game

Scott and the team hit the streets with a silly new game testing whether various excuses actually get you to the front of a supermarket queue, with increasingly absurd results.

2007-01-16

16 January 2007: Pointless Survey of the Day and Cat Lover Dating Website

Scott and the team explore a dating website designed for cat lovers to find romantic matches, fielding caller Mrs. X who admits her cats have sabotaged previous relationships, while also running their signature “Pointless Survey” asking the public which celebrity they’d eat on a desert island.

2007-01-18

18 January 2007: Make Laura Cry Feature

The team debuts a brand new feature designed to finally make Laura cry, after years of trying and failing to reduce her to tears on air — and they surprisingly succeed with an unexpectedly emotional video clip.

2007-01-19

19 January 2007: Laura’s Pregnancy Test and S Club 7 Records

Danny Howard stands in for Grimly as the team discusses whether Laura might be pregnant, leading to an on-air pregnancy test, while also debating whether to burn S Club 7 records in protest over Jade Goody’s Big Brother controversy.

2007-01-23

23 January 2007: Chinese Takeaway Game

Scott kicks off the show with the Chinese Takeaway Game, challenging listeners to guess dish number 10 from Ned’s Noodles in London for a free delivery dinner — a feature that stretches across much of the episode with multiple rounds and eventual success.

2007-01-24

24 January 2007: What the Hell Am I Doing Quiz and Fruit Bouquets

Scott unveils a new quiz feature where listeners must guess what he’s doing based on audio recordings of everyday household tasks, while the show also discusses Valentine’s Day plans and receives an unusual fruit bouquet gift.

2007-01-30

30 January 2007: H from Steps’ Big Brother Reunion Bombshell and the Snake-Necked Jaguar Romance

H from Steps announces he’d now consider reforming the band after his Celebrity Big Brother experience, prompting Scott and the team to rally listeners against the idea—and later help a caller track down a mysterious Australian-costumed bloke she snogged in a Nottingham club.

2007-01-31

31 January 2007: Wolfgang’s Poetry Direct and the Georgie Thompson Mix-Up

Scott makes an embarrassing on-air blunder when he accidentally compares Sky Sports News presenter Georgie Thompson to comedian Harry Hill, then watches in real-time as she reads the sports bulletin unaware of his gaffe — before Wolfgang’s Poetry Direct delivers a brutal breakup poem to a betrayed listener.

2007-02-02

2 February 2007: Estate Agent Prank and the Hen Weekend Mix-Up

Scott impersonates pop star Mika to wind up a snooty London estate agent, then reunites a listener with the man she kissed on a hen weekend—only to discover he’s already someone else’s boyfriend.

2007-02-05

5 February 2007: Late-Night Radio Discoveries and the Smithton Chocolate and Fudge Packers

Scott reflects on tuning into Dick and Dom’s Breakfast Show early in the morning and shares a hilarious clip from a local radio station’s night shift, featuring an unexpectedly charming dedication to the workers at a chocolate factory.

2007-02-06

6 February 2007: Fake American Record Producer Caught on Air

Scott investigates a dodgy chat-up artist who claims to be a famous American record producer, leading to one of the show’s most brilliant on-air stings featuring an actual Akon confrontation and a hilariously unconvincing fake accent.

2007-02-07

7 February 2007: Laura Gets Engaged, David Blaine’s Speed of Light Stunt

Laura from the listener competition wins the prize of true love when her boyfriend James proposes during a hilariously uneventful phone call — but the unedited tape reveals Scott may have had the ending all wrong.

2007-02-08

8 February 2007: Playing for Rob’s Stuff with His Mum

Scott calls up a listener’s mum who’s been selling her son’s possessions in the local newspaper without permission—then turns it into a twisted game of Play Your Cards Right to win the items back.

2007-02-09

9 February 2007: David Blaine, Celebrity Chef Action Films, and Sue Marchent’s Quiz

Scott and the team cover David Blaine’s disappointing “speed of light” trick at a phone launch, revisit Sue Marchent’s baffling “What Is It?” quiz from Radio Norfolk, and discuss a listener’s ambitious screenplay concept: an 80s action blockbuster starring Tom Cruise as a celebrity chef.

2007-02-13

13 February 2007: The Fake Daughter Bust and Leon from Shipwrecked

Scott confronts a girl who’s been claiming to be his 19-year-old daughter Emily Mills to chat up boys in Leeds, then the show gets unexpectedly sidetracked by listeners’ reactions to a bikini-wearing contestant on Shipwrecked.

2007-02-14

14 February 2007: Caller Seeks Help Convincing His Mum He’s Not Gay

A caller rings in asking Scott and the team for help persuading his mother that he’s straight, leading to a chaotic and hilarious discussion about stereotypes, celebrity chefs, and the absurd suggestion that he simply “try being gay” for an easy life.

2007-02-21

21 February 2007: Mr. T Dumps Rosie’s Cheating Boyfriend Phil Live on Air

A podcast best-of episode featuring Scott Mills away, with a memorable stunt: Mr. T himself calling up a listener’s unfaithful boyfriend to deliver a live radio dumping, complete with characteristic catchphrases and moral outrage.

2007-02-22

22 February 2007: The Darren Sherman Dating Disaster

Scott tells the increasingly bizarre true story of Darren Sherman, a management consultant who wouldn’t let a failed first date go—pursuing a woman for $50 with emails, voicemails, threats of legal action, and even calling her employer.

2007-02-23

23 February 2007: Tinie Tempah Temptation Test

Scott is away on holiday, so the show replays a classic feature where a caller’s boyfriend is tested for loyalty when “Tinie Tempah” (actually Danny Howard) calls to flirt with him — and the result turns surprisingly romantic.

2007-02-27

27 February 2007: Fraser’s Surprise Return to Stand-Up Comedy

Scott discovers his flatmate Fraser, drunk from a day in the pub, has called into Radio 1’s Surgery and is now being lined up for an impromptu gig at the Comedy Store that very evening — much to Scott’s horror.

2007-02-28

28 February 2007: Patrick Kielty and the Flatmate’s Comedy Store Disaster

Patrick Kielty guests as Scott and the team dissect a genuinely excruciating performance by Scott’s flatmate Fraser at the Comedy Store’s gong night – a man determined to heal the world through comedy who lasted just 26 seconds on stage.

2007-03-01

1 March 2007: Fraser’s Comedy Mission to Heal the World

Scott hosts a guest to help salvage the comedy career of Fraser, a well-meaning but painfully unfunny friend who has decided his life mission is to heal people through laughter—despite bombing spectacularly at the Comedy Store and a new acts night at The Bedford pub.

2007-03-02

2 March 2007: Russell Howard and the “Doctor Comedy” Flatmate Challenge

Scott’s on a mission to help his flatmate become a stand-up comedian through the healing power of laughter, and enlists the help of comedian Russell Howard to offer guidance after the hopeful’s first two gigs go spectacularly wrong.

2007-03-05

5 March 2007: Fraser’s Live Comedy Gig with Electric Shock Collar

Scott and Alan Carr host a live comedy event in a bar near Radio 1, where Scott’s flatmate Fraser attempts to “heal the world through laughter” while being subjected to an electric shock collar that zaps him whenever the audience decides he hasn’t been funny enough.

2007-03-06

6 March 2007: Urban Myths and Hotel Room Stories

Scott debunks a series of persistent urban myths circulating among listeners, from claims about Shakira to the infamous Richard Gere rumour, while fielding callers with their own bizarre stories about poo in teapots and mysterious incidents in shop fitting rooms.

2007-03-07

7 March 2007: Carla’s Hotel Guest Left Behind Polaroids

Scott speaks to Carla, who works at a London hotel, about some rather compromising Polaroid photos left behind by French guests—and attempts a phone call to the hotel to return them, complete with a hilariously failed French accent.

2007-03-08

8 March 2007: Florist Card Challenge Returns

Scott returns to the florist card challenge — testing how outrageous a message a flower shop will agree to print — this time enlisting a New York florist to see if American shops have different standards than their UK counterparts.

2007-03-09

9 March 2007: Laura’s Paranoid Boyfriend Check

Scott and the team orchestrate an elaborate prank on Laura, who’s convinced her boyfriend James is misbehaving at a conference in Belfast — with hilariously incriminating results when they phone the hotel posing as her.

2007-03-14

14 March 2007: The Dave Game and Get Me Out of Here

Scott plays the Dave Game, phoning random businesses to see if someone called Dave works there, and then runs a chaotic rescue mission where he impersonates a panicked German grandmother to help a listener escape a bad date.

2007-03-16

16 March 2007: Fergie Interview and Get Me Out of Here Feature

Fergie from The Black Eyed Peas visits the show to chat about her new single “Glamorous,” and the team features a listener’s disastrous date rescue via the Get Me Out of Here text service, complete with an accidentally German grandmother impression that may have tanked her chances with her date.

2007-03-19

19 March 2007: Catherine Tate Interview and Comic Relief Pledges

Catherine Tate joins the show to discuss a sketch involving Tony Blair, and the team help facilitate charity pledges for Comic Relief, including a particularly memorable appeal to reunite a caller named Steve with his ex-girlfriend Rachel.

2007-03-20

20 March 2007: Who The Hell Are You? and Rob’s Tampon Mix-Up

Scott attempts a long-dormant game of “Who The Hell Are You?” by calling a mystery celebrity, but the feature spectacularly falls apart—followed by Rob’s hilariously awkward pharmacy mishap where he asks for “tampons” from a handwritten shopping list.

2007-03-21

21 March 2007: Girls Aloud Phone Number Prank and Social Experiment

Scott conducts a cheeky social experiment by giving out what listeners think is a Girls Aloud member’s phone number, then calls back the men who ring it posing as the band members themselves — with hilariously awkward results.

2007-03-22

22 March 2007: Noisy Neighbours and Revenge Prank

Scott and the team help a listener get revenge on her housemate’s loud boyfriend by organizing an elaborate prank call, complete with a “neighbourhood watch” inspection and accusations of animal sacrifice.

2007-03-23

23 March 2007: Karma, Shower Gel, and the Final Bubble Game

Scott’s having a nightmare week—a broken car, a split toenail, no shower gel—and decides it’s all down to karma. He launches an ambitious plan to make amends for every wrong he’s ever done, complete with an online form for listeners to submit their grievances.

2007-03-26

26 March 2007: Bad Karma, Spying Neighbours, and Dolly Parton

Scott’s string of bad luck continues when he discovers his neighbours have placed a mirror in their garden to spy on him — and he responds by flashing them. Meanwhile, Casualty reveals she’s somehow secured tickets to see Dolly Parton, sparking a debate about who really knew about the concert.

2007-03-27

27 March 2007: Sensitive Boyfriends and Garden Mirrors

A show dominated by callers with relationship troubles — specifically about dating overly emotional men — plus a discussion about neighbours using mirrors to spy through windows, and a real news story about people wrapping their TVs in tinfoil to avoid the licence fee.

2007-03-28

28 March 2007: The Wrong Burger 911 Call

Scott and the team play an extraordinary 911 call from a woman in California who calls emergency services multiple times because Burger King keeps getting her Western burger order wrong — and the bewildered dispatcher’s increasingly exasperated responses are comedy gold.

2007-03-29

29 March 2007: Scott’s Birthday Dedications Special

Scott’s birthday brings a flood of celebrity well-wishers to the show, including Charlotte Church, Cheryl Cole from Girls Aloud, and Kylie Minogue — plus extended coverage of the upcoming Celebrity Wife Swap featuring Paul Daniels, Debbie McGee, Ben (from A Flock of Seagulls), and Vanessa Feltz.

2007-04-03

3 April 2007: James Redmond from Casualty and Birthday Messages

Scott chats with Casualty actor James Redmond about filming in Bristol, discusses the show’s most gruesome injuries, and continues to receive birthday messages from local radio stations — including a quiz feature he’s keen to steal.

2007-04-04

4 April 2007: World’s Worst Quiz Contestants

Scott plays a selection of hilariously bad quiz answers from BBC local radio stations, including contestants who struggle with basic geography and completely misunderstand simple clues.

2007-04-05

5 April 2007: The Sunday Quiz Question That Nearly Broke Radio 1

A contestant struggles painfully—hilariously—to understand the simple concept of reverse trivia, taking nearly three minutes to grasp what question matches the answer “Sunday.”

2007-04-10

10 April 2007: Making Germans Laugh

Scott and the team attempt to prove that Germans have a sense of humour with a special game, while Laura provides an unexpected contribution to the show’s comedy moment.

2007-04-11

11 April 2007: Treadmill Trivia – The First Running Machine Quiz Show

Scott debuts an entirely new game show concept: Treadmill Trivia, where contestants must answer general knowledge questions while running on a treadmill that speeds up with every wrong answer.

2007-04-12

12 April 2007: Treadmill Trivia with Edith Bowman

Scott brings back the physical and mental challenge of Treadmill Trivia, this time recruiting guest Edith Bowman to run on the machine while answering questions. The episode also features a caller with an irrational—and vocally defended—hatred of Sandra Bullock.

2007-04-16

16 April 2007: Making Germans Laugh

Scott and the team attempt to prove that Germans have a sense of humour by telling jokes to unsuspecting members of the public in Germany, dispelling the stereotype that they can’t take a laugh.

2007-04-17

17 April 2007: Catherine Tate Interview and Comic Relief DVD

Catherine Tate returns to discuss her fastest-selling Comic Relief DVD and gets pestered by callers, plus Scott plays a genuinely disturbing 1950s public information film about the “dangers” of homosexuals.

2007-04-19

19 April 2007: Castaway Prank Calls and Mouse Trap Minefield

Scott and the team pose as Castaway producers to interview the four Radio 1 listeners in the running to join the island, asking increasingly outlandish questions about nudity, romance, and crawling into a dead moose carcass — while Laura navigates a blindfolded mouse trap minefield in the studio.

2007-04-20

20 April 2007: The Livestock Lounge – Kissing Animals Blindfolded

Scott and the team transform the live lounge into a “livestock lounge” for a wild new game where a blindfolded contestant must identify animals purely by kissing them — featuring a rabbit, a duck, a lamb, and a snake, with hilariously panicked results.

2007-04-24

24 April 2007: Daleks, Melons, and Jo Whiley’s Potty Mouth

A chaotic show packed with Dalek voice boxes, a surprising theory about melon-buying habits, and an apology for Jo Whiley accidentally swearing on air during a bingo game.

2007-04-25

25 April 2007: Paintball Apple Shoot in the Radio 1 Beer Garden

Scott and the team head to a pub garden near Radio 1 for a bizarre game involving a paintball gun, an apple, and Laura’s head on the line — all decided by a William Tell trivia question.

2007-04-26

26 April 2007: The Scariest Advert Ever, Brazilians, and MySpace Cats

A chaotic show filled with genuinely unsettling American gun-rental adverts, an extended debate about what Brazilians are actually named after (with surprising geographical analysis), and multiple callers confessing to creating MySpace pages for their cats — written entirely from the cats’ perspective.

2007-04-27

27 April 2007: The Rude Car Man and Jo Whiley’s Prank

Scott attempts to reform a rude motorist with a Susan Jeffers self-help tape prank, and then falls victim to an elaborate wind-up from Jo Whiley involving a fake voicemail message recorded on the street.

2007-04-30

30 April 2007: Gaylord the Dog and Who Listens Naked?

Scott discovers a brilliantly named 1950s American toy dog called Gaylord (complete with bone), and launches a running bit asking listeners to call in naked — which, despite it being 4pm on a Friday, yields several willing participants.

2007-05-02

2 May 2007: Laura’s Commando Stunt and Chelsea Players’ Awkward Interview

Scott attempts to sell paparazzi photos of Laura to The Sun after she attends the Sony Radio Awards, then the show features a hilariously uncomfortable Chelsea Football Club interview where players struggle to admit another teammate is good-looking.

2007-05-03

3 May 2007: Pillow Fighting League, The Biggest Loser Game, and Blow Your Load

Scott and the team dive into Canada’s unlikely national sport of competitive pillow fighting, play Laura’s new quiz game “The Biggest Loser” where yes-answers spell out L-O-S-E-R, and attempt a sticky new game involving fizzy drinks and pop sweets.

2007-05-04

4 May 2007: Alec Baldwin Voicemail Prank Call

Scott uses clips from Alec Baldwin’s infamous angry voicemail to his daughter to prank-call a rude driver who had sworn at Scott’s mum on the road.

2007-05-09

9 May 2007: Power Plates and Tooth Tunes

Scott tests his theory that power plates were invented purely so men could watch women jiggle, and later discovers Tooth Tunes — a toothbrush that plays music through your teeth.

2007-05-10

10 May 2007: Quiz Game Resolves Jenny’s Ex-Boyfriend’s Belongings

Scott sets up a quirky quiz game to finally force Jenny’s reluctant ex-boyfriend Nick to collect his belongings he’s left scattered around her flat for three months — with the twist that he wins back items if he answers questions about his former girlfriend correctly, but she destroys them if he gets them wrong.

2007-05-11

11 May 2007: The On-Hold Game and Floral Girlfriend Conspiracy

Scott and the team wage war on a frustrating mail order company by keeping their customer service rep on hold for over four minutes, complete with voice changers and an impersonation of Emeli Sande — then discover a bizarre pattern of listeners whose exes only date girls with specific names.

2007-05-14

14 May 2007: Phishing Email Prank Call

Scott and the team tackle spam emails promising millions, culminating in a brilliant prank call to a real phone number from one of the scam messages — with hilarious consequences.

2007-05-16

16 May 2007: Mika Interview and Estate Agent Prank Challenge

Mika visits to discuss the upcoming BBC Radio 1 Big Weekend, and Scott challenges him to beat a record-breaking prank call to an estate agent — with Mika’s Lollipop Girl character as the angle.

2007-05-22

22 May 2007: Innuendo Bingo and Laura’s Pie Game

Scott and the team celebrate Innuendo Bingo’s expansion to BBC Radio 5 Live Sports Extra, then Laura introduces a bizarre new game where Scott must identify which Radio 1 Big Weekend artists left behind their pies.

2007-05-23

23 May 2007: “Seven Hot Things to Say to a Woman” and Fortune Cookie Messages

Scott tests out a viral email of “seven hot things to say to a woman” by calling up colleagues and his own mum, with hilariously mixed results, then moves on to fortune cookie messages and the “add in bed/in my pants” game with listeners.

2007-05-25

25 May 2007: Susan’s Star Wars Seduction Story and Spam Email Prank

Scott receives a caller with an embarrassingly relatable dating disaster involving mood lighting, Barry White, and Star Wars, then uses the story as inspiration for an elaborate prank calling a scam email contact.

2007-06-05

5 June 2007: The 1980s Hip Hop Documentary and Dave Pearce’s Rapping Past

Scott unearths a hilarious 1980s hip-hop documentary featuring Dave Pearce as a respected rap DJ, complete with absurd local UK crews like the Two Hype Posse from Oxstead, Surrey, and Codename Rebel from Spring, Hartfordshire.

2007-06-06

6 June 2007: Sunset Tan Reality TV, Sink Weeing, and Scott’s Harp Promise

Scott discovers the deeply unsettling reality show Sunset Tan, featuring an eight-year-old getting a $1,300 spray tan to look like Lindsay Lohan; later, he confesses to drunkenly promising to play the harp at a friend’s wedding next year despite having no idea how to play.

2007-06-12

12 June 2007: Sunset Tan and Spray-Tanning a Corpse

Scott discovers his new favourite American reality TV show Sunset Tan, where a Los Angeles tanning salon’s staff get asked to do some truly bizarre jobs — including spray-tanning a deceased person at a morgue.

2007-06-14

14 June 2007: Lisa’s Mixed Tape from Her Ex-Boyfriend

Scott plays back a hilariously earnest homemade cassette tape made by a listener’s ex-boyfriend in 2001, complete with romantic declarations, carefully curated love songs — and bewilderingly, “The Bad Touch” by the Bloodhound Gang.

2007-06-15

15 June 2007: The Piano Seduction Disaster

A caller’s romantic evening takes an unexpected turn when his date abandons their kiss to launch into an impromptu piano recital – repeatedly – and the show stages a hilariously awkward reconstruction of the scene.

2007-06-19

19 June 2007: Steve and Lauren’s Glastonbury Wedding Gambit

Scott Mills launches a wild new feature to find couples willing to get married at Glastonbury for tickets — and the first contestant is a 20-year-old Oxford lad named Steve who wants to marry his girlfriend’s best friend instead of his actual girlfriend Jen, who’ll be at a family wedding that weekend.

2007-06-20

20 June 2007: Alex and Fiona’s Glastonbury Wedding Audition

Scott meets Alex, 19, and her best friend Fiona, a Scottish woman she’s known for five years, who are willing to get married to each other just to get into Glastonbury Festival — and the chemistry between them is absolutely undeniable.

2007-06-21

21 June 2007: Anthea Turner Tours Scott’s Bedroom

As part of the “My Name is Scott” karma-busting feature, TV’s Anthea Turner and Laura infiltrate Scott’s bedroom to conduct a humiliating home inspection, opening drawers and cupboards for every wrong answer Scott gives in a perfect housewife quiz.

2007-06-26

26 June 2007: Innuendo Bingo on Radio 2 and Troy’s Disastrous Anniversary Tape

Scott celebrates Innuendo Bingo’s surprise migration to Radio 2 (where Steve Wright unknowingly participates), then plays the extraordinary voicemail from a listener named Troy, who recorded a 14-minute romantic anniversary message for his girlfriend—only to be dumped three days later, after she forwarded the tape to everyone she knows.

2007-06-27

27 June 2007: Love Letters from Royston (Spacehog)

Rachel calls in to share embarrassing love letters she received from Royston, the drummer of 1990s rock band Spacehog — who is now married to actress Liv Tyler, currently living in Leeds.

2007-06-28

28 June 2007: My Name is Scott — Electrified Karma

Scott faces his past misdeeds in the second instalment of *My Name is Scott*, this time armed with a megaphone, a dog shock collar, and a rainy London street—all to repent for spoiling *The Apprentice* for Matt.

2007-06-29

29 June 2007: New Flirt Divert Number Revealed

Scott and the team unveil a brand new Flirt Divert phone number to replace the old one, complete with instructions on how to use it — and a hilarious voicemail example featuring someone repeatedly demanding their shoes back.

2007-07-02

2 July 2007: Flirt Divert Returns with Kinky Bernard and Randy Mandy Classics

Flirt Divert makes its return to the show, with Scott and the team revisiting some of the best moments from Kinky Bernard and Randy Mandy’s appearances on the feature.

2007-07-03

3 July 2007: Bad Singers, Dierdre’s Casebook, and Men in Lacey Underwear

Scott and the team showcase a selection of hilariously bad amateur singers who’ve applied for a rock band, explore another eyebrow-raising instalment of Dierdre’s video casebook involving a man secretly wearing his girlfriend’s underwear, and take listener calls about men’s confessions.

2007-07-04

4 July 2007: Paula Abdul’s Drunken Starbucks Video and Compliments for Men

Scott discovers a viral video of Paula Abdul staggering around late at night trying to order a latte with no money — and the similarities to one of his colleagues are apparently staggering.

2007-07-05

5 July 2007: The Shopping Trolley Noise Experiment

Scott attempts an audacious live experiment to lock up shopping trolley wheels across the country by broadcasting a special frequency, leading to traffic chaos at supermarkets and listeners caught in the middle.

2007-07-06

6 July 2007: Russell Brand’s Seduction Technique and the Cake Competition Woman

Scott and the team tackle cake competitions, a very drunk woman’s first date with teetotal Russell Brand, and an evening at a transvestite club that left everyone confused about who was dancing with whom.

2007-07-09

9 July 2007: Handlebar Moustaches, Shayne Ward’s Helium Karaoke and Flirt Divert

Scott attends the Handlebar Club in London, rents fake moustaches for the evening, and Shayne Ward (X Factor winner) accidentally records a helium-voiced novelty single that becomes the show’s latest comedy feature.

2007-07-10

10 July 2007: Love Songs from Exes and the Flirt Divert Number

Listeners send in cringe-worthy love songs recorded by their exes trying to win them back — and Scott and the team dissect them with brutal honesty, including a Birmingham rapper’s dramatic bid to reunite with his ex-girlfriend Laura.

2007-07-11

11 July 2007: Songs for Exes and Scott’s Romantic Prospects

Scott receives song submissions from listeners who’ve written tracks about their ex-partners, including one caller named Jack who’s made a song called “The Best Girl in the World” about his ex-girlfriend Grace — though Scott’s feedback suggests the lyrics might be more unsettling than romantic.

2007-07-12

12 July 2007: Fiona Bruce Reads Flirt Divert Texts

Newsreader Fiona Bruce becomes an unlikely guest on Flirt Divert, the show’s weekly feature where celebrities read out cheeky text messages sent to the show’s number — though she proves rather more restrained than the team might have hoped.

2007-07-17

17 July 2007: Flirt Divert and Drunken Answerphone Messages

A feature all about the pitfalls of alcohol and mobile phones — Flirt Divert returns with a fresh batch of cringe-worthy voicemail messages left by people who’ve had a few too many drinks before deciding to call someone they fancy.

2007-07-18

18 July 2007: Big Brother Reads Flirt Divert Texts and Laura Auditions as P. Diddy’s PA

Scott and the team create a chaotic audition video for Laura to submit as P. Diddy’s personal assistant, after the rapper’s MySpace profile advertises the position online.

2007-07-19

19 July 2007: Innuendo Bingo with Molly Mae and Recycled Phone Numbers

A vintage episode built around two brilliant running features: Molly Mae reads out the filthiest flirt-text messages ever broadcast, and the team discovers what happens when celebrity phone numbers get recycled and end up with unsuspecting members of the public.

2007-07-20

20 July 2007: Harry Potter Spoiler Prank

Scott and the team play an elaborate prank on listeners by having someone read out a fake ending to the final Harry Potter book, causing genuine distress to callers who believe the series has been ruined for them.

2007-07-23

23 July 2007: Electric Shock Test with Laura

Laura takes on the Electric Shock Test, a trivia challenge where each wrong answer results in an increasingly painful electric shock — and she’s not happy about it from the start.

2007-07-25

25 July 2007: Treadmill Trivia with Chopper and Laura

Scott’s afternoon team launches “Treadmill Trivia,” a quiz where contestants run on a treadmill that speeds up with every wrong answer — with predictably chaotic results when both Chopper and Laura take it on.

2007-07-26

26 July 2007: Casualty Hurts Scott’s Car

Scott tries to make amends for his past misdeeds by playing a quiz game where Joe destroys his beloved Nissan Micra with a sledgehammer and eventually a tank — all to settle scores over pranks involving fake “Casualty” calls to other Radio 1 DJs.

2007-07-27

27 July 2007: Float Divert Answerphone Messages and Mis-Teeq

Scott and the team play a selection of hilarious messages left on the show’s float divert answerphone — a feature where listeners give out a fake number when they want to dodge someone asking for their contact details — and somehow Mis-Teeq appears to be among the callers.

2007-08-01

1 August 2007: The Bookshop Game

Scott and the team call up real bookshops asking for made-up books with ridiculous titles and author names, catching the booksellers’ increasingly baffled responses.

2007-08-07

7 August 2007: Lindsay Lohan Driving People Out of Hollywood

Scott discovers a real property advertisement from Los Angeles that explicitly markets homes as an escape from Lindsay Lohan, Paris Hilton, and Britney Spears — proof that the young actress’s celebrity status is literally affecting the housing market.

2007-08-08

8 August 2007: The Jiggy Noise and Dangerous Gigs

Scott investigates a supposedly science-backed “jiggy noise” that’s claimed to make women swoon, and hears from listeners about the most dangerous concerts they’ve attended — including one memorable Travis gig involving projectile vomiting.

2007-08-09

9 August 2007: Laura’s Failed Brad Pitt Flirt Divert Prank

Laura attempts to secure a celebrity to read out Flirt Divert text messages but spectacularly fails, first trying to trick Scott with fake Brad Pitt clips before eventually resorting to using a voice-changing machine on her own voice.

2007-08-14

14 August 2007: Louis Walsh on X Factor Drama, Judges and Pop Stars

Louis Walsh drops by to discuss his shock sacking from and swift reinstatement as a judge on The X Factor, reveals details about the new series and line-up, and delivers his blunt opinions on current pop stars from Britney Spears to Amy Winehouse.

2007-08-17

17 August 2007: Honesty Wallet Experiment and Romantic Role-Play

Scott drops a wallet containing £50 and the studio’s phone number on a London street to test public honesty — and when a finder agrees to return it, she changes her mind and triggers an on-air chase through the streets. Meanwhile, the team debates whether various romantic gestures are genuinely sweet or deeply creepy.

2007-08-21

21 August 2007: Golden Moments and The Bubba Game

Scott’s away on holiday in northern France with his dad, so today the show runs a highlights episode featuring some of his best-loved bits, starting with the infamous “Bubba Game” — a feature that has won multiple international radio awards.

2007-08-22

22 August 2007: Chappers Presents Golden Moments

With Scott on holiday, Chappers takes over the week with a selection of the show’s most memorable moments — including the legendary florist robbery prank and the Darren and Joanne email saga that spawned the catchphrase “do the right thing.”

2007-08-23

23 August 2007: Sick Jokes, Posh Noises, and Shopping Trolley Chaos

Scott returns with a chaotic edition full of deliberately unfunny “sick jokes” designed to test listeners’ sense of humour, plus the return of the posh noise and an ambitious nationwide experiment to disrupt supermarket trolleys using ultrasonic frequencies.

2007-08-24

24 August 2007: Darth Vader, Laura as a Man, and the Take-Away Game

A golden compilation episode featuring some of the show’s best prank calls and pranks: Darth Vader rings a confused garage, Laura ventures out disguised as a bearded man, and the classic take-away game creates chaos between two Chinese restaurants.

2007-08-29

29 August 2007: Scott Stuck in the Bog and German Radio Gets Its Revenge

Scott disappears during the show after getting stuck in a broken toilet, and the team plays clips of The Simpsons dubbed in French — which Scott hilariously finds funnier than the English version — before revealing how a German radio station got their own back on the “How To Make A German Laugh” feature.

2007-08-30

30 August 2007: High School Musical Surprise for Cass

Scott surprises an 11-year-old girl named Cass with an incredible gift after she bravely dealt with losing her best friend in a tragic accident — bringing in members of the High School Musical cast to invite her to the London premiere.

2007-08-31

31 August 2007: KT Tunstall and Singing Telegrams

KT Tunstall drops in for a chat and performs a series of custom singing telegrams for lucky listeners, plus the return of “Are You Sick?” — the feature that tests whether your sense of humour is twisted beyond repair.

2007-09-03

3 September 2007: Phone Spring Clean and Miss South Carolina

Scott admits to wine-fuelled phone book purging after a Heroes screening, and the show dissects the infamous Miss South Carolina beauty pageant answer that’s sweeping the internet.

2007-09-04

4 September 2007: Louis Walsh’s Birthday Surprise and Charity Record Pitch

Pearl Mackie sits in for Grimmy on Breakfast, and the team orchestrates a surprise phone call from Louis Walsh to birthday girl Furnitcheon, pitching an unlikely charity record collaboration and attempting to coax a reluctant singing performance over the phone.

2007-09-05

5 September 2007: Laura’s Wedding Season and X Factor Chat

Laura returns from a wedding-packed weekend with stories of grooms recycling the same internet speech at two separate ceremonies, while the team discuss The X Factor and a sweet Japanese contestant who flew to meet Simon Cowell.

2007-09-07

7 September 2007: Instruments and Attractiveness

Scott and a guest explore which musical instruments make people more attractive, testing out drums, violin, cello, saxophone and bassoon to comic effect, while also reviewing celebrity charity artwork and discussing Scott’s inability to whistle.

2007-09-10

10 September 2007: Musical Instruments & Street Art Surveys

Scott and the team revisit the question of which musical instruments make people more attractive, then send Laura onto the streets to ask members of the public to guess the age of the artists behind Scott and Chris’s drawings — with hilariously misjudged results.

2007-09-11

11 September 2007: Flirt Divert Calls and X-Factor Guilt

Scott and the team wade through a selection of bizarre voicemail messages left on the Flirt Divert line, before exploring the emerging phenomenon of “X-Factor guilt” — the uncomfortable feeling of laughing at tone-deaf auditionees on the talent show.

2007-09-14

14 September 2007: Russian Speaking, Strictly Denial, and Bookshop Prank Calls

Scott’s attempts to speak Russian seem to be having an unexpectedly powerful effect on female listeners, while he vehemently denies rumours that he’s about to appear on Strictly Come Dancing.

2007-09-18

18 September 2007: The X Factor Guilt and Million Count Man

The show opens with a discussion about “X Factor guilt” — the uncomfortable feeling of laughing at struggling contestants — before pivoting to an internet oddity that’s captured the team’s attention: a man who spent 89 days counting to a million on webcam.

2007-09-19

19 September 2007: The Posh EasyJet Cabin Crew Member Ralph

Scott tracks down Ralph, an extraordinarily posh EasyJet cabin crew member whose announcement before takeoff left passengers convinced he couldn’t possibly be real, leading to a brilliant conversation about code-switching and working-class supermarket beginnings.

2007-09-20

20 September 2007: Freshers’ Week Relationship Warning and Innuendo Texts

Scott takes aim at long-distance university relationships during Freshers’ Week, warning listeners that keeping a partner back home is a doomed venture, while Davina McCall reads out some genuinely rude text messages.

2007-09-21

21 September 2007: The Great Melon-Crushing Challenge

Scott receives an email from a listener in York whose new girlfriend crushes a melon between her thighs in the kitchen, prompting an on-air experiment that spirals into callers attempting the same feat from around the country.

2007-09-25

25 September 2007: Rugby, Naked Thieves, and X-Factor Guilt

Scott’s in a squeamish mood as he tackles rugby chat, viral videos of people throwing up on live TV, and a deeply guilt-inducing X-Factor audition that leaves him genuinely emotional.

2007-09-26

26 September 2007: Foam Book Game Returns with Ridiculous Town Names

Scott revives the Foam Book game with a completely new format — instead of calling Americans with amusing names, the team now rings people living in places with hilariously unfortunate town names, including Ball Knob, Big Beaver Boulevard, and Dildo, Tennessee.

2007-09-27

27 September 2007: Dick and Dom Read the Texts, and “The Ladies Bras” Song Debuts

Dick and Dom step in last-minute to read out the show’s daily text messages, while Whisby’s novelty one-hit wonder “The Ladies Bras” gets its radio premiere — and Scott sets the team a competitive challenge to book better guests, with a thousand-pound bonus on the line.

2007-09-28

28 September 2007: Kelly Arrives for Surgery, Spider Pig Baby Names, and Help Me Anthea

Kelly Brook arrives to begin her presenting duties on the relaunched Surgery feature, while Scott pursues an increasingly elaborate campaign to convince listeners to name their unborn children Spider Pig.

2007-10-01

1 October 2007: Lorraine Kelly and Page 3 Girls (“Best Guest” Week)

Part of “Best Guest” week, with Lorraine Kelly kicking things off, followed by a blindfolded segment with two Page 3 models where Scott accidentally gropes them during a guessing game — and then gets them to sing along to “The Ladies’ Bras.”

2007-10-03

3 October 2007: Dani Minogue, X Factor Judges Impressions, and the Pedro/Bjork/Vladimir Game

Dani Minogue drops by as Scott’s celebrity guest for the week, performing X Factor judge impressions and getting roped into the show’s signature international stereotype name-calling game.

2007-10-04

4 October 2007: Yvette Fielding, Demon Dan, and The Hoover Trick

Scott and Chappers attempt to become children’s entertainers (inspired by the Wiggles), while Yvette Fielding discusses her ITV2 ghost-hunting show and Demon Dan from the Circus of Horrors performs his infamous and deeply uncomfortable Hoover act live on air.

2007-10-05

5 October 2007: McFly, Mel C’s Spice Girls News, and the Matt Damon Game

McFly visit the studio to perform and attempt the hoover trick, while Mel C drops exclusive news about new Spice Girls tour dates and a brand new single called “Headlines.”

2007-10-08

8 October 2007: Wine Tasting with James May and Oz Clarke at 8:30am

Laura’s quest to become P. Diddy’s personal assistant suddenly bears fruit with emails from Diddy’s team, while Scott, James May and Oz Clarke attempt an early-morning wine tasting before heading off to entertain children at a nursery.

2007-10-09

9 October 2007: Katie Brand & The Children’s Entertainment Challenge

Katie Brand joins as the mystery guest with wine in hand, and Scott and Chappers attempt to become children’s entertainers at a London nursery—with mixed results involving a cow costume, a magic frog, and some surprisingly critical three-year-olds.

2007-10-10

10 October 2007: Real Or No Real Quiz Launch with Phillip Schofield and Mr. Methane

Scott launches a brand new quiz feature called “Real Or No Real” and speaks to Phillip Schofield on the phone, while the show’s special guest Mr. Methane — the performer famous for farting recognizable tunes — joins the studio.

2007-10-11

11 October 2007: Chappers and Laura’s Birthday, Louis Walsh Crashes, Mel C Guest

A chaotic birthday special featuring Chappers and Laura’s on-air celebration, complete with Laura’s ultimatum for an engagement ring by 10 a.m., an uninvited Louis Walsh phoning in, and special guest Mel C attempting to navigate an awkward reunion with her longtime manager.

2007-10-23

23 October 2007: England’s Rugby Loss, Swedish Fish, and Love Song Generator

Scott presents his comedic theory about why England lost the Rugby World Cup (spoiler: it involves Nelson Mandela and Denise Van Outen), investigates whether Swedish people really do urinate on fish, and introduces listeners to an AI song-writing service that proves romance doesn’t require actual musical talent.

2007-10-24

24 October 2007: Earl Robinson’s Week-Long Hiccups and the No Cussing Club

Scott discovers a sports presenter in Michigan who’s been suffering from hiccups for over a week, then joins a no-cussing club started by a 14-year-old in California — and reveals that he, Jo Whiley, and Chappers have been filming together for Deirdre’s video case book.

2007-10-25

25 October 2007: The Cinnamon Challenge and Loose Lips

Scott and Chappers attempt the supposedly impossible task of eating a teaspoon of cinnamon, and the results are predictably chaotic. Plus, Scott launches a brand new feature to find the UK’s biggest gossip.

2007-10-26

26 October 2007: Blindfold Cat Food Taste Test and Konnie Huq’s Job Pitch

Scott takes on a blindfold taste test comparing gourmet and ordinary cat food — and discovers he actually prefers the premium version. Meanwhile, Greg James’s early morning call to Konnie Huq about a potential co-hosting gig reveals she’s rather desperate to land a job at Radio 1.

2007-10-29

29 October 2007: Steve Strange on Celebrity Scissorhands Series 2

Steve Strange returns to promote the new series of Celebrity Scissorhands for Children in Need, now promoted to assistant manager of the salon academy, and Scott gets the inside story on the celebrity lineup and what to expect.

2007-10-30

30 October 2007: Flirt Divert Answerphone, Cryogenic Freezing, and Wendy Richards Health Panic

A chaotic Tuesday of Flirt Divert messages, existential chat about how people want to be buried (Chappers surprisingly reveals he’d like to be frozen), and an oddly panicked segment where no one at Radio 1 can confirm whether Wendy Richards is still alive.

2007-10-31

31 October 2007: American Accents and Loose Lips Gossip

Scott tests his theory that Americans can’t do British accents by calling people across the US, while the Loose Lips feature backfires spectacularly when Jordan accidentally tells the whole nation about his mum’s boob job.

2007-11-02

2 November 2007: Deidre’s Video Casebook and the Fastest Loose Lips Ever

Scott, Jo and Chappers star in their own ridiculous Deidre’s Video Casebook sketch about office crushes and landladies, then expose the South Wales gossip Laura in a record-breaking Loose Lips feature that clocks in at just 27 seconds.

2007-11-06

6 November 2007: Prison Break Flowers and the Most Welsh Woman Ever

Scott sends a florist an elaborate prison escape message to put on a flower card, and amazingly they write every word without question. Plus, Flirt Divert catches some brilliantly awkward chat-up lines, and the team discover a woman even more Welsh than last week’s standout.

2007-11-08

8 November 2007: Laura’s Puff Daddy Audition, Salary Row, and 28-Hour Days

Laura auditions to be P. Diddy’s new assistant on the Oprah Winfrey Show and doesn’t get the job, leading to a heated on-air debate about Scott’s actual salary and a genuinely bizarre discussion about redesigning the week with 28-hour days.

2007-11-09

9 November 2007: Playing Britney’s Debut Album in Full

Scott attempts to play Britney Spears’ debut album *Baby One More Time* in full without interruption, inspired by Zane Lowe’s Masterpieces feature — but management shut him down after barely one and a half tracks.

2007-11-12

12 November 2007: Wedding TV and Flirt Divert Messages

Laura’s obsessed with a new BBC3 wedding show where a groom picks his bride’s dress without her input — and it goes about as well as you’d expect. Plus the Flirt Divert answer phone returns with more awkward dating messages.

2007-11-13

13 November 2007: The Phantom Knickers Mystery Solved

Scott investigates whether it’s physically possible to crush a tin can with the power of breasts alone, while also solving the mystery of a mysterious pair of black knickers found in the BBC Radio 1 corridor.

2007-11-14

14 November 2007: Love Bite Challenge and Nick Robbins’ Eminem Impression

Scott challenges the entire team to acquire a love bite by the start of the next show, leading to hilarious debate about Hoover suction and squash-ball alternatives. Plus: an unlikely Eminem impersonator from BBC Radio Stoke.

2007-11-15

15 November 2007: The Great Love Bite Mystery and Evil Old Ladies

Scott arrives with an unexplained hickey on his neck, and despite an on-air competition where the team tries to get love bites, nobody can figure out who actually gave it to him. Meanwhile, listeners share stories about sweet old ladies who shamelessly push in at bus stops and supermarket queues.

2007-11-19

19 November 2007: Konnie Huq on Greg James’ Early Morning Obsession and Blue Peter’s CD Appeal

Konnie Huq joins Scott to discuss Greg James’s relentless early-morning phone calls, a Blue Peter appeal for Barnardo’s, and the revelation that a former Blue Peter presenter has become a drag queen named Stella.

2007-11-20

20 November 2007: Flirt Divert Voicemail Special

Scott and the team play back a selection of the week’s most bizarre and awkward voicemail messages left on the Flirt Divert answerphone, including someone confessing they thought the caller was “disgusting looking” and a message that bears a suspicious resemblance to Mike Skinner from The Streets.

2007-11-21

21 November 2007: Scott’s Cleaner Drama and the “Gay Tarzan” Mystery on Hampstead Heath

Scott’s worried his cleaner might have romantic feelings for him after she’s been confiding in him about her personal troubles, while his jogging partner on Hampstead Heath encounters a mysterious noise that sounds suspiciously like a “gay Tarzan.”

2007-11-22

22 November 2007: The Florist Game Goes to Holland, Terry Wogan’s Innuendo, and the Christmas Number 1 Campaign

The Florist Game travels to Amsterdam to test whether Dutch florists will write absolutely anything on a card—including rap lyrics—while Scott campaigns hard to get a miserable indie song to number one at Christmas.

2007-11-23

23 November 2007: Dutch Florists Rapping Pop Hits and Celine Dion Disasters

Scott resurrects the Dutch florist game with a twist—getting Amsterdam florists to rap current pop songs on floral greeting cards—while callers ring in with disastrous Celine Dion stories and Scott mysteriously becomes irresistible to Eastern European women.

2007-12-11

11 December 2007: The Sugababes Visit, Big Booby Cookie Challenge, and Kate Lawler’s Noisy Studio

The Sugababes drop by to chat about accidentally splitting up during an interview in Japan, while Scott launches the ridiculous “Big Booby Cookie” challenge with a volunteer named Fran—and keeps getting distracted by Kate Lawler making noise in the next studio.

2007-12-12

12 December 2007: “But I’m Not Wearing Any Knickers” and the Big Booby Cookie Experiment

Scott discovers what he believes is the ultimate phrase to silence a busy public place after hearing a woman shout it at London Gateway Services, and tests it with listeners and celebrity guest Lorraine Kelly — while also checking on Fran’s progress with the F-Cup Cookie experiment.

2007-12-13

13 December 2007: Mika Finds Saucy Accessories in Jo Whiley’s House

Mika uncovers some unexpectedly risqué items hidden in Jo Whiley’s wardrobe, Scott repeatedly denies planting photos of himself in Jo’s bedroom, and the American Dial-a-Carol service gets increasingly irritable after being overwhelmed by Radio 1 listeners.

2007-12-14

14 December 2007: Britney Spears Smells of Trout

Scott launches his own religious cult after watching a Channel 4 documentary, and the Pointless Survey of the day asks the nation what Britney Spears smells like—with hilariously specific results.

2007-12-18

18 December 2007: Chocolate Liqueurs Breathalyzer Challenge

Scott conducts a scientific (if chaotic) experiment to discover how many chocolate liqueurs it takes to push someone over the drink-drive limit, with willing volunteer Laura as test subject.

2007-12-19

19 December 2007: Would You Kiss a Goat That Looks Like Britney Spears?

Scott unveils a genuinely bizarre pointless survey asking listeners if they’d kiss a goat that looked exactly like Britney Spears but still made goat noises—and then measures Fran’s chest as the “big boobie cookie lady” continues her quest for bigger breasts through Japanese supplements.

2007-12-20

20 December 2007: The Livestock Lounge – Kissing Mystery Animals Blind

In a chaotic and hilarious special edition of the Live Lounge renamed the “Livestock Lounge,” Scott is blindfolded and tasked with identifying mystery animals by kissing them—with predictably comedic results involving a turkey, a guinea pig, and a singing toy goat.

2008-01-02

2 January 2008: Scott’s New Darts Talent and Lakeside Championships

Scott discovers an unexpected talent for darts over the Christmas break and begins fantasising about a professional darts career, complete with entrance music, a glamorous companion, and a stage name – all while debating whether he really needs to drink beer or adopt the typical darts player aesthetic.

2008-01-04

4 January 2008: Random Text Phrases, Gok Wan Impressions, and Pet Cemeteries

Scott introduces a new feature where listeners text random phrases to unsuspecting contacts in their phone book, with hilarious results — including accidentally texting Alan Carr. The show also explores the embarrassing subject of violent grandmothers, pet burial ethics, and whether bedroom webcams are genuinely innocent or cause for concern.

2008-01-10

10 January 2008: Selling Stories to the Sun

Scott, Chappers, and Laura compete to keep a Sun newspaper journalist on the phone longest while pitching increasingly outlandish celebrity scoops, and the mystery of the “Scariest Movie of All Time” deepens with hints that it might involve Scott in the nude.

2008-01-11

11 January 2008: Scott Plays Darts at Lakeside, Facebook “Complicated” Relationships, and Kids Re-enact Horror Movies

Scott finally gets his moment at the World Darts Championship at Lakeside, playing a leg against Peter Crouch with Ray Stubbs commentating—and the experience is delightfully surreal. Meanwhile, listeners decode what “complicated” actually means on Facebook relationship statuses, and kids hilariously attempt to remake classic horror films.

2008-01-17

17 January 2008: Paul McKenna’s Hypnosis Help and Craig David’s Romantic Tactics

Hypnotist Paul McKenna visits the studio to offer advice on everything from helping Laura con her boyfriend into marriage to overcoming fear of flying, while Scott’s investigation into Craig David’s romantic methods reveals the star uses singing oompa loompa telegrams to woo women.

2008-01-18

18 January 2008: Radiohead Quiz and Fighting Five-Year-Olds

Radiohead drop in to play a specially devised quiz, Scott and Chappers ring the Chorley Citizen newspaper trying to sell them outrageous stories, and the show explores the burning question: how many five-year-olds could you actually fight?

2008-01-22

22 January 2008: Sarah Beeny Visit and Scott’s YouTube Eyeball Stunt

Sarah Beeny kicks off the station’s Best Guest Fortnight with a chat about dating, sheds, and more, while Scott’s recent bizarre eyeball antics have somehow become a top 5 YouTube hit.

2008-01-23

23 January 2008: Peter Dickson’s Best Guest Week Episode

Peter Dickson, the legendary voice-over artist behind The X Factor and numerous other TV shows, becomes the second contender in Best Guest Week — and brings his considerable vocal talents to bear on an array of requests from listeners.

2008-01-24

24 January 2008: Garry Stretch and Hannibal Helmurto from the Circus of Horrors

Day 3 of Best Guest Fortnight brings the grotesque spectacle of the Circus of Horrors to the studio, as skin-stretcher Garry Stretch and sword-swallower Hannibal perform their acts live — with the added awkwardness of it all being a radio show where listeners can only hear the reactions.

2008-01-25

25 January 2008: Career Laughing, Cheerleaders, and Roadkill

Day 4 of Best Guest Week brings British cheerleading champions to teach Scott their moves in full costume, but the real comedy comes from a prank where Radio 1 staff are secretly tested on whether they’ll do “career laughs” for an unfunny fake BBC executive.

2008-01-28

28 January 2008: Atomic Kitten, Emma Chawner, and Best Guest Week Final

The climax of Best Guest Week features Atomic Kitten reunited for a charity album project, a chance encounter with X Factor’s Emma Chawner, and the announcement of who’s won the trip to Scott’s dad’s house in Normandy.

2008-01-29

29 January 2008: Jono’s Never Seen a Bond Film

Scott discovers that Jono, who runs the Unofficial Mills fan site, has somehow reached his late teens or twenties without ever watching a single James Bond film — and the team can’t quite believe it’s possible.

2008-01-30

30 January 2008: Psychic Sally and Upstaged Auditions

Scott watches a reading from psychic Sally Morgan that accurately predicts his new BBC3 show Upstaged before it’s publicly announced, plus listeners share stories of girlfriends with unusual practice habits — from TV presenter aspirations to beautician training.

2008-01-31

31 January 2008: Psychic Scott Predicts Barry’s Love Life

Scott discovers he might have psychic powers after a series of small coincidences, and decides to put his newfound abilities to the test by offering predictions to callers — including Barry from Wiggins, who wants to know if he’ll get lucky tonight.

2008-02-04

4 February 2008: The Hoola Chair and Upstaged Contestants

Scott discovers a ridiculous home fitness invention that’s somehow worse at being discreet than it sounds, and previews early contestants for his new BBC Three talent show Upstaged, including a five-piece girl band called The Electric Dolls performing their track “Baps Are Baking.”

2008-02-05

5 February 2008: Play Your Boing Right and the Kelly Osbourne Mix-up

Chappers debuts a new guessing game where he has to estimate how many kissing partners callers have had, while a listener’s confusion between Kelly Osbourne and Kerry Katona leads to an awkward on-air moment.

2008-02-06

6 February 2008: Romantic Novels and BBC 3’s Upstaged

Scott reads steamy extracts from a tacky romance novel on air and asks listeners how many actually read them—discovering that young women are far more into Mills & Boon than he’d expected. He also plugs his new BBC 3 show Upstaged, a talent competition broadcast live from glass boxes in Bristol.

2008-02-08

8 February 2008: Scott and Laura Write Romantic Fiction as ‘Stephanie Black’

Scott and Laura launch a tongue-in-cheek romantic novel writing venture, unveiling the first two chapters of “A Long Hot Summer” under the pen name Stephanie Black, complete with dramatic readings featuring some memorable accents from the team.

2008-02-11

11 February 2008: Skins Cast Interview and Flirt Divert Serial Daters

Scott welcomes Michelle, Maxie and Chris from the hit teen drama Skins to discuss the new series, but the conversation is frequently derailed by increasingly bizarre Flirt Divert voicemails—including a guy called Mickey who only dates girls whose names rhyme with his, and another caller who’s managed to date eleven different Janes.

2008-02-12

12 February 2008: Sexy Jobs Survey and Mr. Microphone

Scott presents a pointless survey ranking the sexiest jobs—including the bizarre inclusion of cowboys—and introduces a baffling vintage invention called Mr. Microphone, a cordless FM broadcaster that lets you transmit to car radios from your home.

2008-02-13

13 February 2008: The Mystery Telescope and Forces Sweetheart Plans

Scott discovers a telescope mysteriously positioned on his landing, pointed directly at his neighbour’s bedroom window—and spends the show insisting it’s not his while nobody believes him. Meanwhile, the army gets in touch about his earlier jokes about becoming a Forces Sweetheart.

2008-02-14

14 February 2008: Season 2 Premiere of “My Name is Scott” — Jo Whiley’s Paintball Revenge

The long-awaited return of “My Name is Scott” sees Jo Whiley get her own back on Scott in spectacular fashion, armed with a paintball gun and a warehouse full of quiz questions designed to humiliate him.

2008-02-18

18 February 2008: Susan on Radio 1

A caller requests to be called Susan, which sparks the revelation that Laura has been calling Scott “Susan” all along — leading to the birth of “Susan on Radio 1” — while Laura becomes convinced that Scouting for Girls wrote their hit “She’s So Lovely” about her.

2008-02-19

19 February 2008: Party Tricks, Kerry Katona and the Flirt Diverters

Scott embarks on a quest to acquire a party trick after feeling inadequate without one, leading to listener suggestions ranging from human bagpipes and duck sneezes to a deeply alarming eyeball-based noise trick. Meanwhile, Chappers gets uncomfortably flirty with clips from Kerry Katona’s new MTV reality show.

2008-02-22

22 February 2008: Reading His Cleaner’s Body Language

Scott is baffled by his cleaner’s behaviour and enlists the team’s help to decode what her body language might mean — a conversation that quickly spirals into increasingly absurd analysis of where her legs were pointing.

2008-02-25

25 February 2008: Flirt Divert and Celebrity Messages

A Monday edition packed with Flirt Divert messages, including potential calls from Big Brother alumni and the question of whether Perez Hilton actually left a voicemail, plus more tales from Scott’s cleaner and whether she was flirting with him.

2008-02-26

26 February 2008: Scott and Laura’s Romantic Novel ‘A Long Hot Summer’

Scott and Laura debut their romantic fiction project under the pen name ‘Stephanie Black’, with the team dramatising excerpts from their novel ‘A Long Hot Summer’ — complete with Chopper’s distinctive accents bringing the steamy scenes to life.

2008-02-27

27 February 2008: Radio 1 Toilet Disaster, Gaze Dating, and Rick Astley’s Crying Baby Cure

A blocked toilet disaster has made the BBC Radio 1 basement smell like a sewer, Scott’s convinced he knows who did it, and a bizarre new dating craze called “eye gazing” is sweeping New York City—but the episode’s real revelation is that Rick Astley’s “Never Gonna Give You Up” inexplicably stops babies from crying.

2008-02-28

28 February 2008: Loose Lips Returns, Chicken Impossible, and Pippa’s Engagement Announcement

Scott’s mice are back and bolder than ever, Loose Lips returns in full dramatic teen-soap style, and there’s an unexpected engagement announcement that leaves Laura decidedly unenthused.

2008-03-03

3 March 2008: Leap Day Proposals and EastEnders Awkwardness

On Leap Day (29 February), Laura decides to use the tradition that allows women to propose to men — and Scott and the team spend the entire show dreaming up increasingly elaborate schemes to coerce her reluctant boyfriend James into popping the question.

2008-03-04

4 March 2008: Jellyfish Wee, Moment of Truth, and Dodgy Song Lyrics

Scott discusses who he’d want to wee on his jellyfish sting (Colin Murray wins for being a good distraction), cringes through clips from the American lie-detector gameshow Moment of Truth, and points out that parents complaining about modern lyrics should remember some of the genuinely filthy songs from the 60s and 70s.

2008-03-05

5 March 2008: Lucy’s Mum and the Geography Teacher

Lucy came home from hockey practice to find her mum in a compromising clinch with her geography teacher — and the show explores what might be even worse situations involving a parent’s romantic choices, plus some genuinely filthy lyrics from songs your grandparents used to listen to.

2008-03-06

6 March 2008: Criminal Nicknames and the Love or Hate Game

Scott explores the world’s worst criminal nicknames (the Crutch Bandit tops the list for sheer embarrassment), then introduces a brand new game that asks listeners to guess whether celebrities have more love or hate websites online.

2008-03-07

7 March 2008: The Hawaii Chair Disaster and Dumping Excuses

Scott’s long-awaited Hawaii chair arrives at Radio 1, but a dramatic malfunction nearly sends him flying across the studio—and then the team hunt for the most creative excuses people have used to avoid admitting to their mates they’ve been dumped.

2008-03-10

10 March 2008: Chappers’ Sport Relief Tour and Filthy Old Toys

Chappers kicks off his ambitious Sport Relief challenge, visiting every English and Scottish Premiership ground to run a mile at each venue, while Scott marks the occasion with a specially written song — performed in Chappers’ own distinctive style.

2008-03-11

11 March 2008: Love Without Language, Scarlett Johansson Charity Auction, and Barry the Badger

Scott explores whether relationships can work when neither person speaks the other’s language, hears from listeners with wildly mixed results (including one involving Meatloaf lyrics), and gets distracted by Radio 1’s increasingly famous toilets and a man in a badger suit called Barry.

2008-03-12

12 March 2008: Annoying Toys for Revenge, Strip Poker Stories, and Chappers & Dave’s Three-Legged Mile

Scott explores the ethics of buying someone’s kids deliberately annoying presents as revenge, hears some genuinely ear-splitting examples, and discusses whether strip poker ever ends well — while Chappers and Dave continue their Sport Relief challenge with a three-legged run at Middlesbrough’s Riverside Stadium.

2008-03-13

13 March 2008: Female Secrets Exposed and Embarrassing Mishaps

Scott reveals “secrets of the female mind” from a men’s magazine article, and the responses from female callers range from amused confession to outright fury at having their tactics exposed. Meanwhile, there’s a parade of stories about attempts to look cool that end in disaster—from Scott’s own tumble down wet steps at the Upstage filming to a caller who walked into a glass squash court door trying to impress his ex.

2008-03-19

19 March 2008: Paris Hilton’s Search for a New Best Friend

Paris Hilton is hunting for a new best friend via a reality TV competition, and Laura becomes the obvious candidate—but not before the team works through some genuinely alarming (and hilarious) applicant videos. Plus: Chappers’ unexpected singing career takes off in supermarkets, and Scott issues a public service announcement about chilli and intimate moments.

2008-03-20

20 March 2008: Westwood In-Studio, Bell Ringers, and Jo Whiley’s German Soap Obsession

Westwood drops by to chat about One Extra Live in Coventry, his new YouTube channel, and to tease Scott about his toilet habits before taking over the show on Easter Monday. Later, Jo Whiley visits to discuss her unexpected obsession with the German soap Lindenstraße and attempts to translate bizarre clips, plus Scott tries to recruit young bell ringers willing to play modern hits.

2008-03-26

26 March 2008: Matt Willis, the Twodaloo, and Bob’s Broly

Matt Willis drops in for a chaotic show featuring Scott’s latest bizarre invention (the Twodaloo—a double toilet for couples), a campaign to win a Bob Crampton umbrella from ITV West, and Matt taking to the streets with a megaphone to deliver some genuinely funny sketches.

2008-03-27

27 March 2008: Naked Bath Phone Calls and Paris Hilton’s Best Friend Wannabes

Scott and Chappers explore the surprisingly awkward (or oddly comfortable) experience of chatting on the phone while naked in the bath, plus Chappers’ vocal talents get an unexpected airing in a Currys electrical store.

2008-03-31

31 March 2008: Flirt Divert Stories, Who’s Blogging Quiz, and Barryoke

A show packed with listener contributions to the Flirt Divert voicemail number, plus Scott’s new celebrity blog-guessing quiz and the return of Barryoke — featuring people named Barry singing modern pop hits.

2008-04-01

1 April 2008: Pop Idol or Live Lounge Game, Daniel Bedingfield’s Lucky Pants, and Barryoke

Scott’s dreadful April Fool prank (a one-minute fake proposal) falls flat, but the show bounces back with a clever guessing game pitting international Pop Idol contestants against Radio 1 Live Lounge performers — plus a chat with Natasha Bedingfield about her brother’s lucky recording pants.

2008-04-02

2 April 2008: David Tennant and Catherine Tate with Hawaii Chair Stunt

David Tennant and Catherine Tate visit to promote Doctor Who’s fourth series, with the Doctor himself attempting the infamous Hawaii Chair exercise machine – with chaotic results.

2008-04-03

3 April 2008: Patsy Palmer on Eastenders Return, Pointless Survey of Hated Words

Eastenders star Patsy Palmer drops by on her way to an early shift to chat about returning to the soap, plus Scott unveils a potential singing discovery and listeners vote on their most despised English words.

2008-04-04

4 April 2008: Mariah Carey Interview and Embarrassing Moments

Scott admits he completely bungled his interview with Mariah Carey after turning up exhausted and spraying himself with air freshener beforehand — and things only got worse from there.

2008-04-07

7 April 2008: “What Are Those Kids and Old People On About?” Quiz

Chappers faces a peculiar guessing game where children and elderly people describe famous celebrities, TV characters, and public figures — with wildly inaccurate and often hilarious results that leave him baffled and entertained.

2008-04-08

8 April 2008: Ghost Hunting in the Radio 1 Basement and the Strange Clowns Documentary

Scott ventures into the spooky basement of Radio 1 dressed as a Ghostbuster to hunt for the station’s resident ghost, with predictably terrifying results when a hidden colleague in a sinister clown mask jumps out at him.

2008-04-10

10 April 2008: Truth or Dare with Tarantulas and Embarrassing Secrets

Scott faces an impossible choice between hearing deeply embarrassing secrets about himself revealed on air or holding a live tarantula in his bare hand — and he chooses the spider.

2008-04-11

11 April 2008: Chappers’ Choice and Barryoke Grand Finale

Chappers faces the choice between having his secrets revealed on air or dancing with an exotic dancer, while Scott undergoes Future Life Progression to peek 100 years into his own future.

2008-04-29

29 April 2008: The Amsterdam Florist Raps Flo Jo

A Dutch florist unknowingly reads out lyrics from Flo Rida’s “Low” on a flower card, plus Barry’s first baby is named Barry, and annoying people at football matches take centre stage.

2008-04-30

30 April 2008: Chappers’ Train Story, Coldplay’s “Violet Hill” Mystery, and Party in My Tummy

Chappers finds himself in hot water over a misrepresented story about not giving up his seat on a train—but the truth is far more complicated, while Scott tracks down the real “Violet Hill” and discovers a listener who’s been keeping her ex-boyfriend’s hair in a bag.

2008-05-02

2 May 2008: Beccy’s Street Scratch Cards and Wing’s Big Weekend Demands

Beccy confesses to compulsively picking up discarded scratch cards from the street in the hope they might be unclaimed winners — and Scott discovers she’s not alone in the habit, though she regrets walking past one earlier in the day that looked particularly promising.

2008-05-08

8 May 2008: Beccy’s Classified Bargains and the Kent Road Mystery

Beccy unearths some genuinely bizarre items for sale on internet classifieds — including a transexual rocking horse — while the team torments listeners by withholding the answer to an unexpectedly popular trivia question about Kent road construction.

2008-05-09

9 May 2008: Wing’s Big Weekend Surprise and Nelly’s Flying Fears

Scott funds a surprise trip from New Zealand to bring his favourite singer Wing to perform at Radio 1’s Big Weekend, and reveals she’s planning a very special tribute song — while Nelly drops by to discuss his fear of flying and jokingly negotiate for the biggest dressing room.

2008-05-13

13 May 2008: Nelly YMCA, Wings at Big Weekend, Beat The Star Pea Game

Chappers is tricked into believing Nelly performed YMCA at Radio 1’s Big Weekend, and Scott reveals he’s lost the only CD of Wings’ performance at the festival — except for one song captured off the radio.

2008-05-15

15 May 2008: Scott Gets Hit By An Egg And A Red Onion

Scott is attacked by two kids on mountain bikes who throw an egg and a red onion at him outside a pub, plus the team tackle Beccy’s classifieds bargains, play Badly Bleeped TV, and try to get Wing to number one.

2008-05-16

16 May 2008: Gross Out Friday and Chappers’ David Brent Dancing

Scott and the team play a disgusting game where they try to make each other squirm, scream and throw up with horrible clips — and discover a viral video of Chappers dancing like David Brent on a nightclub dancefloor.

2008-05-21

21 May 2008: Cake Roulette, the Raffles Place Ghost, and Scott’s Stalker Fan

A chaotic episode sees the team launch Cake Roulette — eating cakes sent in by listeners with unknown contents — only for Beccy to reveal she’s secretly laced Scott’s slice with laxatives. Meanwhile, Scott discovers he features in a published book by an obsessed fan from his early radio days.

2008-05-22

22 May 2008: Bumaggedon and Chappers’ Chelsea Confession

Scott reveals the uncomfortable aftermath of cake roulette featuring laxatives, while Chappers makes hilariously contradictory statements about his football loyalties ahead of the Chelsea vs Manchester United Champions League final.

2008-05-27

27 May 2008: Tom from Come Dine With Me and Serbian Phrases for Eurovision

Scott speaks to Tom, the star of the previous night’s Come Dine With Me, who worried he’d come across badly on camera — and then Chappers quizzes him on Serbian phrases ahead of Scott’s Eurovision trip, plus another round of Barryoke.

2008-05-28

28 May 2008: Belgrade Hotel Horror and Guide Pigs

Scott returns from the Eurovision Song Contest in Belgrade with war stories about a deeply questionable “hotel for the unpretentious traveller,” plus an investigation into whether guide pigs actually exist.

2008-05-30

30 May 2008: Dave Pearce’s Egg Revenge and Innuendo Bingo

Dave Pearce gets his revenge on Scott with eggs, while the team tackle phrases you really shouldn’t use in polite conversation and laugh at another round of Innuendo Bingo.

2008-06-02

2 June 2008: Scott Pretends to Be on the Phone, Plus American Newsreader’s Awkward Passion

Scott is caught red-handed pretending to be on a phone call in a pub toilet, leading to a hilarious new quiz. Plus, an American newsreader gets uncomfortably theatrical while reading out explicit text messages between Detroit’s mayor and his chief of staff.

2008-06-03

3 June 2008: Manbo Twister in the Pub Toilet

Scott takes the new Manbo Twister exercise device to a local pub to test its versatility claim — with predictably chaotic results involving a white wine spritzer, a bemused crowd, and an awkward encounter in the gents toilets.

2008-06-05

5 June 2008: Acting Challenge with Barry Chuckle and Strange Love Documentary

Scott and Chappers compete for a part in The Bill with Barry Chuckle as judge, while the show also features a bizarre documentary about a woman married to the Eiffel Tower, plus Mr Wet Y-Fronts 1997 and Beccy’s Classifieds.

2008-06-09

9 June 2008: Lloyd’s Euro 2008 Predictions and Celebrity Barryoke

Scott talks through Euro 2008 football predictions with resident 12-year-old expert Lloyd, then features a special Celebrity Barryoke performance from Barry Chuckle tackling Jay-Z’s “99 Problems.”

2008-06-10

10 June 2008: Sara Bareilles, Lloyd’s Theme Tune, and Stuff from Your Ex

Scott insists Sara Bareilles is being unreasonably “mardy” for refusing to write a love song for her boyfriend, while Lloyd the 12-year-old football correspondent demands his own theme tune — and the team sound progressively drunker as the show goes on.

2008-06-11

11 June 2008: Spray Tan Live on Air and Barryoke Friday

Scott gets a spray tan applied live in a pink tent on the show while Beccy joins in, and darts legend Phil Taylor calls in from Robbie Williams’ Hollywood house—plus it’s Barryoke Friday.

2008-06-12

12 June 2008: Malcolm Bonkers and the Fly-Swallowing Reporter

Scott considers changing his name to Malcolm Bonkers after meeting a listener with that actual surname, while the team investigates a viral clip of a reporter who swallows a fly live on air and has a complete breakdown.

2008-06-13

13 June 2008: Kate Silverton’s Revenge on “My Name Is Scott”

BBC News reader Kate Silverton joins Scott on his “My Name Is Scott” repentance feature, turning the tables by revealing she’s caught him red-handed—making drunk audio clips of her sound ridiculous on air, which she’s now forcing him to make increasingly awkward phone calls to apologize.

2008-06-16

16 June 2008: Chappers’ Cricket Cupboard and Lloyd’s Football Facts

Chappers claims to be reporting live from Old Trafford cricket ground in Manchester for the England vs New Zealand Twenty20 match, but the team is deeply sceptical of his story — especially when suspicious background sounds emerge. Meanwhile, Lloyd returns with more football facts, and there’s another hilarious Barryoke performance.

2008-06-17

17 June 2008: Truth or Dare with Beccy, Mystery Chemist Products, and Lloyd’s Football Facts

Beccy faces an uncomfortable choice between revealing embarrassing secrets from friends or eating bizarre exotic foods while blindfolded in a tense game of Truth or Dare, plus the show calls chemists with deliberately awkward product names and revisits some memorable listener stories.

2008-06-18

18 June 2008: Beccy’s Fake Dad & Lloyd’s Football Facts

Beccy is sent to find a complete stranger at Oxford Circus to impersonate her father when her boss calls during a fake sickie, plus Lloyd returns as the show’s irreverent 12-year-old football expert to preview Euro 2008.

2008-06-19

19 June 2008: Online Dating Disasters and Bargain Hunting

Two listeners share bewildering messages from the same persistent online dater whose elaborate, over-the-top first contact email becomes the unlikely centrepiece of the show — set to music for full effect.

2008-06-20

20 June 2008: Beccy’s Lying Challenge and Lloyd’s Magic 8 Ball Euro 2008 Predictions

Scott challenges Beccy to persuade a complete stranger to lie for her on the street, while Lloyd returns with his Magic 8 Ball to predict the Euro 2008 quarter-final results. Plus, the team discovers gummy sweets shaped like lighthouses—sweets that look decidedly un-lighthouse-like.

2008-06-23

23 June 2008: Ellie Barry’s Farewell and Lloyd’s Coin Flip

Scott reflects on taking his maths GCSE exam live on air with the team, while emotional listener Ellie Barry from Cirencester bids farewell to her surname on the eve of her wedding — complete with a parody of Elton John’s “Goodbye Yellow Brick Road.”

2008-06-25

25 June 2008: David Hasselhoff Interview and Snakes in the Toilet Movie Pitch

David Hasselhoff rings in from Los Angeles to chat about his new social network Hoffspace, his upcoming UK visit, and a distinctly odd movie idea that Scott dreams up after hearing several bizarre stories about snakes emerging from toilet bowls.

2008-06-27

27 June 2008: Scott Films Hollyoaks, Casts Visit Manchester Studio

Scott has just filmed scenes for Hollyoaks (playing a policeman in a storyline involving handcuffs and blackmail) and sits down with four cast members — Nick Pickard (Tony), Stephanie Waring (Cindy), Darren John Jeffery (OB), and Sarah Jane Dunn (Mandy) — to discuss the show and play a soap trivia quiz.

2008-06-30

30 June 2008: Oh! What’s Occurring Quiz and Harry from McFly

Scott and the team take over the breakfast show while Chris Moyles is on holiday, launching a new prediction quiz called “Oh! What’s Occurring” — and Beccy proves to be a surprisingly good guesser despite not understanding the jokes along the way.

2008-07-01

1 July 2008: Demitri’s Voicemail, Holy Land Experience, and Badly Bleeped TV

An obsessive man named Demitri leaves increasingly aggressive voicemail messages to a woman he met briefly at a bar, culminating in an ultimatum that’s both hilarious and uncomfortable—plus a trip to the Holy Land Experience theme park in Orlando that’s more Bible than Disneyland.

2008-07-02

2 July 2008: Show Homes, Beccy’s Classifieds, and Ben Shepard’s Secret Sadness

Beccy confesses her odd habit of touring show homes she has no intention of buying, prompting Scott to joke about moving into one with David Hasselhoff. The show also features a new round of “Oh! What’s Occurring?”, a string of hilarious classified ads, and an interrogation of Ben Shepard to determine if he’s really a normal person.

2008-07-03

3 July 2008: David Hasselhoff and “Snakes When You Strain”

David Hasselhoff drops by the studio to discuss a bonkers new film concept, appears on The Sunday Night Project later that day, and makes a semi-serious offer for Scott and Beccy to move in with him in Los Angeles.

2008-07-04

4 July 2008: Chappers’ Annual Joke and Summer Plans Revealed

It’s the day of Chappers’ eagerly anticipated annual joke, and Scott reveals Radio 1’s ambitious summer festival schedule — including a Barry Oki trip to Biggleswade that accidentally spawns a running gag about naming future events after people’s hometowns.

2008-07-07

7 July 2008: Beccy Admits She’s Not a Vegetarian

Beccy comes clean about being a secret meat-eater after meeting her Greek boyfriend’s parents, while Scott replays his censored jokes from The Sunday Night Project and reveals whether Nathan went through with his pact to marry an old school friend.

2008-07-08

8 July 2008: The No Cussing Club and American Reality TV Obsession

Scott’s joined an American no-cussing club (“Ya Wanna Hang With Us, Don’t Cuss”), and the team dives deep into bizarre US reality TV shows like Flavor of Love and A Shot at Love with Tila Tequila while discussing the universal reality TV catchphrase “I’m not here to make friends.”

2008-07-09

9 July 2008: The Hoff’s “Baditude” Single and Beccy’s Amazing Classifieds

David Hasselhoff agrees to release a charity single version of his Michael Jackson “Bad” cover attempt, but only if harmonica player Tammy and a more appropriate charity are involved — and Scott discovers he’s won a major poll among tradesmen.

2008-07-10

10 July 2008: Rihanna, Dave Spoon’s Curry Challenge, and Living with the Cheeky Girls

Scott calls Comedy Dave while on holiday to chat with him, Rihanna drops by to answer increasingly personal questions about her normal life, and Dave Spoon attempts to eat spoonfuls of the world’s hottest curry—all in the same episode.

2010-03-10

10 March 2010: Beccy’s LA Prank and the Matt Damon Game

Scott attempts an elaborate prank calling Beccy in “LA with Matt Damon” — but the ruse unravels almost immediately when listeners spot the continuity errors and Greg accidentally spoils it on-air. The episode also features the return of the “Matt Damon Game” where callers compete against Beccy.

2011-10-26

26 October 2011: Chappers Advises Chris on Final Score Ambitions

Chappers rings in to discuss Chris’s new career aspiration to become a football pundit on Final Score, while Smooth Talking Dan surveys Stupid Street on who’s sexy and knows it, and Beccy takes a soaking in Innuendo Bingo: The Duel.

2012-08-22

22 August 2012: Truth or Dare with Nick Grimshaw, Sam and the Womp, and Innuendo Bingo with Fearne Cotton

A busy Wednesday breakfast with Nick Grimshaw playing an intense game of Truth or Dare before taking over the Breakfast Show in September, plus Sam and the Womp visit the studio to teach everyone how to properly “Womp” ahead of a potential number-one single.

2014-08-22

22 August 2014: Speech Jammer with Rick Stoned and Kevin McHale on Stupid Street

Jake from Rick Stoned rings his dad (Hollyoaks’ Shane Ritchie) while suffering the disorienting effects of the speech jammer, and Kevin McHale from Glee heads to Stupid Street to ask British people questions about America.

2014-12-10

10 December 2014: Relationship Transfer Deadline Day Special

Scott Mills and the Radio 1 team turned the day before the relationship deadline into an elaborate parody of football transfer deadline day, complete with reporters across the country, celebrity gossip updates, and real listeners trying to confirm their relationship status before 3pm—after which anyone still coupled up must stay together until January.

2025-09-08

8th September 2025: Radio 2 in the Park Fallout

The Chelmsford weekend was still dominating the breakfast chat. Scott’s voice was “very deep, very Wild West” after all the shouting.

2025-09-09

9th September 2025: Miriam Margolyes unleashed

The star guest at 8:30 was Miriam Margolyes, and Scott warned beforehand: “I haven’t prepared much, because there’s no point. It’s Miriam. We’ve even got a censor on standby.”

2025-09-10

10 September 2025: Joel Dommett and Jamie Oliver

Why are there so many staplers in the Radio 2 studio?

2025-09-11

11 September 2025: A very Downton morning

The team speculated wildly about Jo Whiley’s “mystery guest” later tonight — guesses ranged from Cher Lloyd to the Cheeky Girls.

2025-09-12

12 September 2025: The mucky pup and the national treasure

Big Guest Friday delivered three major names – Davina McCall, Clare Balding and Olly Alexander – but the surrounding chaos, laughter and classic Mills humour made it a show to savour.

2025-09-16

16 September 2025: Colin Farrell, Margot Robbie & the chaos of open tabs

Scott was back on Tuesday after a cheeky extra day off.

2025-09-17

17 September 2025: Ed Sheeran, overdue library books & uni goodbyes

Ed Sheeran’s arrival on the 8th floor was the big moment of Wednesday’s show, and from the start you could feel how much the listeners had been waiting for it.

2025-09-20

18 September 2025: Sheridan Smith, Dylan Llewellyn & Elton’s golden kneecaps

Scott kicked off Thursday in a giddy mood, testing out face yoga live on air after a listener swore by it.

2025-09-20

19 September 2025: Vernon & Paddy reveal Radio 2’s next Children in Need hero

“If it raises money for the kids, I’ll do it — but I might need a lot of crisps at the finish line.”

2025-09-22

22 September 2025: Pink panda cars, mum confessions and novelty crisps

An unexpected highlight of the morning came when Stefan admitted he’s started collecting novelty crisp flavours.

2025-09-23

23 September 2025: Mitchell & Webb are back

It’s been 15 years since their last TV outing together, but David Mitchell and Robert Webb were back on the airwaves with Scott Mills, bringing wit, nostalgia and a lot of silliness to Tuesday’s show.

2025-09-24

24 September 2025: Rita Ora, Bake Off chaos & Strictly soap legends

From the moment she sat down, she was fizzing with stories, positivity and her trademark cheeky humour.

2025-10-06

6 October 2025: Taylor Swift, traffic lights & bin-day meltdowns

The show reached fever pitch when Taylor Swift joined the studio.

2025-10-08

8 September 2025: Cinema naps, spaghetti hoops & Tina’s boot-sale obsession

Scott kicked off Wednesday’s show with a confession: he’d fallen asleep during a film the night before — twice.

2025-10-09

7 October 2025: Tomato panic, fridge psychology & 00s nostalgia

Scott kicked off the show with a food-based crisis after Tina Daheley admitted she’d eaten an entire punnet of cherry tomatoes before 7am.

2025-10-09

9 October 2025: Celebrity Traitors chaos, Alan Carr’s sweat and Norman Collier revival

The morning after Celebrity Traitors aired on BBC One, the Scott Mills Breakfast Show descended into glorious chaos.

2025-10-10

10 October 2025: Bob Mortimer, Brian Cox & Gloria Estefan

Gloria Estefan leads Scott, Tina, Ellie, Bob and Brian in the Conga around Radio 2’s corridors.

2025-10-13

13 October 2025: Rain chaos, posh dogs & surprise flamingos

The morning’s oddest story came from a listener in Skegness, who rang in to report that three escaped flamingos had been spotted in a caravan park.

2025-10-14

14 October 2025: Toast, traffic and Tina’s tea disaster

At 8:30, the studio lights dimmed (literally — Scott asked for “mood lighting”) as Barry Manilow joined live to talk about his new album Once Before I Go and upcoming farewell tour.

2025-10-18

15 October 2025: Spoiler chaos, sourdough bears and Ed Gamble

The text that summed it up: “Sourdough bears, spoilers, and a chicken impression before 9am. Peak Radio 2.”

2025-10-18

16 October 2025: Trains, toast and Channing Tatum

Scott introduced him as “the only man who can make sitting on a stool look cinematic.”

2025-10-18

17 October 2025: Mel C, Russell Tovey & Peter Capaldi

Scott mentioned how Northern Star remains one of the most-played tracks on Radio 2, which made Mel laugh and say, “It’s wild — it still pops up everywhere!”

2025-10-20

20 October 2025 – Lewis Capaldi in the studio

Lewis Capaldi joined just after 8:30, immediately joking with Scott about their history.

2025-10-21

21 October 2025 – Trains, toast and country star Luke Combs

The morning’s big guest was Luke Combs, joining the show to talk about his “Growin’ Up and Gettin’ Old” world tour and his love for UK crowds.

2025-10-22

22 October 2025: “Bruce Day” with Springsteen and Jeremy Allen White

The Bear, “Chef Mike,” and sleepless stress.

2025-10-23

23 October 2025 – Queen nostalgia with Bill Bailey

Scott introduced “Radio 2’s unofficial Queen correspondent”, Bill Bailey, calling him “a man who can play Bohemian Rhapsody on a doorbell.”

2025-10-25

24 October 2025: Big Guest Friday with Reese Witherspoon, La Voix and Westlife

“Beautiful chaos — Westlife were boisterous, Reese Witherspoon was really famous, and La Voix… well, I love her.”

2025-10-27

27 October 2025: Chris McCausland on comedy, Strictly and seeing the funny side

“That’s what Mondays need – a bit less moaning and a bit more dancing.”

2025-10-28

28 October 2025: Jon Bon Jovi drops by for stories, laughs and living on a prayer

At 8:30, Scott introduced “a man whose name alone makes people stand up a little taller” — Jon Bon Jovi.

2025-10-29

29 October 2025: Stefan Dennis surprises Scott as mystery guest!

Scott opened the midweek show full of energy, joking about Bake Off disasters and teasing that “anything can happen as our feature mystery guest is back.”

2025-10-30

30 October 2025: Spooky stories with Daisy May and Charlie Cooper 👻

Listeners sent in Halloween confessions, including one who wrote: “I tried to scare my partner last night and scared myself instead.”

2025-10-31

31 October 2025: Big Ghost Friday with Mika, Ellie Taylor, Alexandra Burke

Scott Mills kicked off the Halloween edition of his Radio 2 breakfast show in suitably chaotic fashion.

2025-11-03

3 November 2025: Rise of the Christmas Creepers

Listeners proudly confessed to early wrapping, wreaths and scented candles.

2025-11-04

4 November 2025: Scott, Tina & Ellie in Gymnastics Mode

Scott delivered on all fronts — mostly by accidentally turning the studio into a gymnasium.

2025-11-05

5 November 2025: Dame Mary Berry on Baking, Freezers & Fanny Craddock

Mary brought her famous chocolate cake, the same one on the cover of her new book Mary 90.

2025-11-06

6 November 2025: Scott prepares for Traitors final

“If someone tries to make you go to a fireworks display, tell them to rip off because it’s Traitors’ nine o’clock, BBC One.”

2025-11-08

8 November 2025: Jayde Adams, Sam Ryder and Stephen Mangan

Scott Mills came in still buzzing from the Celebrity Traitors final, and it was the morning everyone needed to debrief.

2025-11-10

10 November 2025: Sara Cox’s epic 135 mile Children in Need challenge

A huge morning on The Scott Mills Breakfast Show as the nation’s favourite northern DJ, Sara Cox, set off on her epic Great Northern Marathon Challenge for BBC Children in Need.

2025-11-11

11 November 2025: Sara Cox’s Hardest Morning Yet

The Scott Mills Breakfast Show was drenched in Northern spirit — and actual rain — as Sara Cox battled brutal weather, endless hills, and driving wind.

2025-11-12

12 November 2025: Day 3 of Sara Cox’s challenge

Children, parents and commuters sent in voice notes, cheering, crying and telling Sara Cox to “keep on moving.”

2025-11-13

13 November 2025: Sara’s Great Northern Marathon Challenge marches into Day 4

A morning of tears, hills and… twelve balls? As Sara fought through the toughest stage of her marathon challenge, Scott juggled emotional messages and Shetland ponies.

2025-11-14

14 November 2025: Chappers steps up for Sara’s last leg

Scott, Tina, and Ellie held things together live from the “Salford Riviera” as the final day of Sara Cox’s Great Northern Marathon Challenge unfolded.

2025-11-17

17 November 2025: Jane McDonald in the studio

Scott revived the nation’s new favourite segment: Torvill & Dean Watch.

2025-11-18

18 November 2025: Big Coat Chaos, Fake Santa Drama & Jack Whitehall

Fans of the Scott Mills Breakfast Show know that nothing brings the UK together quite like a national temperature check — and today was a Big Coat bonanza.

2025-11-19

19 November 2025: Snow, Scotland and (breaking) sofas

Scotland’s World Cup triumph set the tone for a buzzing, snow-dusted Scott Mills Breakfast Show, packed with Tina’s wardrobe-selling chaos and Ellie’s cracked-sofa confessions.

2025-11-20

20 November 2025: Sandwich Spread, Crispy Pancakes & The Fate of Emilio

Emilio — Scott’s Millennial counterpoint on Elder vs Millennial — tasted sandwich spread for the first time.

2025-11-21

21 November 2025: Romesh Ranganathan, Ella Eyre & Grace Dent

Full review of Scott Mills’ Breakfast Show with Romesh Ranganathan, Ella Eyre and Grace Dent, featuring top quotes, AI laugh chaos, and Big Guest Friday highlights.

2025-11-24

24 November 2025: Bobbie Pryor’s return to Scott’s show

Bobbie Pryor is covering for Ellie Brennan on The Scott Mills Show this week.

2025-11-25

25 November 2025: Scott Mills Finally Presses the Mariah Button

Scott arrived full of festive temptation, openly admitting he’d nearly gone early on Mariah yesterday.

2025-11-26

26 November 2025: Seal Cam & Trevor Nelson’s Secret Shoe Superpower

A Wednesday show packed with sleepy voice notes, Tina’s late-night delivery disaster, Ellie’s radiator saga, Daniel’s Strictly journey update, and Trevor Nelson proving he can guess your shoe size through the radio. Yes, really.

2025-11-27

27 November 2025: Peter Kay talks about living an extrovert life

Peter Kay lit up Radio 2 with an hour of stories, honesty and unstoppable laughter, joining Scott Mills for one of the most loved and lively Breakfast Shows in months.

2025-11-28

28 November 2025: Rag’n’Bone Man, Maisie Adam & Rick Stein

A packed Big Guest Friday saw Scott Mills dive into sound-effects nostalgia, quiz triumphs, candle-lit 1950s Christmas trees, and Rick Stein’s DJ career.

2025-12-01

1 December 2025: Scott Mills Switches On Christmas

Scott Mills officially switched on Christmas across the UK with help from Tina Daheley, Ellie Brennan, Jeremy Vine on Oxford Street, and callers from every corner of the country.

2025-12-02

2 December 2025: Tin Whistles, Nativity Panic & John Batiste

Ellie debuts the tin whistle, Tina battles missing nativity costume fur, Scott spirals over ageing in panto, and John Batiste turns the studio into a groove palace.

2025-12-03

3 December 2025: Hollywood, Secret Santa Chaos & Yorkshire Jokes

Rebel Wilson and Kiefer Sutherland bring panto magic, Secret Santa, and Scott becomes a reluctant Christmas influencer.

2025-12-04

4 December 2025: Tin Whistle Chaos and Doctor Who stars take over

Ellie’s tin-whistle journey goes global, Stacey Dooley unleashes another surprise Christmas tree, and Russell T Davies joins Scott for a chaotic and heartwarming Thursday morning on Radio 2.

2025-12-06

5 December 2025: Shirley Ballas saves a life and Lloyd Griffith gets a 10

Scott’s dog jumper saga, Tina’s emotional nativity pride, the triumphant return of Tunis Cake, Simon’s newborn-induced quiz meltdown, and a superb Big Guest Friday.

2025-12-08

8 December 2025: Twin Sync Chaos, Tunis Cake Pilgrimages and Jungle Queen Alex Scott

Includes Ellie’s tin-whistle Fairytale to a listener flying across the country for a Tunis cake, and Alex Scott glowing about life after the jungle.

2025-12-10

9 December 2025: Storms, Dark Showers and Teletubbies

Scott Mills navigates festive snacks, dark showering debates, an emotional Pause for Thought, chaos in the birthday game and a star-packed Call the Midwife takeover.

2025-12-10

10 December 2025: Scott outsmarted by WhatsApp receipts

Scott Mills discovers he was invited to Tina and Ellie’s big night out and Glenn Close and Mila Kunis deliver one of the funniest Dad Joke battles yet.

2025-12-11

11 December 2025: Rowan Atkinson joins Scott Mills

From bowfluencers and fibre-optic trees to the return of Mr Blobby and the crowning of Strictly Come Daniel, Scott Mills delivered a packed Thursday show.

2025-12-12

12 December 2025: Kylie Minogue, Michael Palin and Greg Davies

From spider scares and Secret Santa to Kylie Minogue co-hosting and Michael Palin’s incredible travel tales, Scott Mills delivered an unforgettable festive Friday on Radio 2.

2025-12-15

15 December 2025: Scott’s Love Actually confession

A Love Actually confession that stunned listeners and Mary Berry’s Christmas wisdom mixed with an iconic EastEnders double act.

2025-12-16

16 December 2025: Strictly Finalists, Elf Stars and Aled Jones Light Up Radio 2

From emotional Pause for Thought reflections to Strictly finalists George and Alexis, plus Aled Jones and Carrie Hope Fletcher bringing festive magic.

2025-12-17

17 December 2025: Smug Last-Days-at-Work Vibes

From Boyzone’s emotional return and Strictly finalists Karen Carney and Carlos Gu, to Christmas films, quiz redemption and Wrap Myself in Paper.

2025-12-18

18 December 2025: Timothée Chalamet, Strictly Finalists and Festive Chaos

From a moving Pause for Thought and Zero Percent Club heartbreak to Strictly finalists Amber and Nikita and a Hollywood moment with Timothée Chalamet.

2025-12-20

19 December 2025: Big Guest Friday with Walsh, Welsh, Calman and Coles

Scott Mills delivered a blockbuster Big Guest Friday packed with laughter, reflection and Christmas joy — from Denise Welsh’s chart battle to Bradley Walsh’s TV dominance and a deeply moving Pause for Thought.

2025-12-22

22 December 2025: Tin whistles, Strictly glory, Jack Black and Paul Rudd

Tin whistles, festive meltdowns, Strictly triumph and Jack Black turning up the chaos — Scott Mills delivers full Christmas Eve Eve Eve radio joy.

2025-12-23

23 December 2025: Elmo, Emilio and Mariah Carey

Tin whistles escalated, present-opening rules were debated, Elmo appeared and Scott handed over to Gary Davies in full festive mode.

2025-12-24

24 December 2025: Remember Monday, Kate Bottley, and Scottport

Remember Monday took over the studio, Scottport made a festive comeback and Christmas Eve unfolded in full Scott Mills style.

2026-01-12

12 January 2026: Scott Mills returns with Robbie Williams

Robbie Williams drops in on Scott Mills as the Radio 2 breakfast show settles back into January life.

2026-01-13

13 January 2026: Tonsils, Abrupt Spice, and Mastermind

A Tuesday of early-start “torture”, Robot Ellie, 70s tonsil trauma, Richie Anderson’s Mastermind wobble and a huge Easiest Quiz score.

2026-01-14

14 January 2026: Instant Coffee Rankings, Duck Drama and Fiona Finally Spills

From supermarket “top buyer” revelations to duck-feeding controversies and a spoiler-heavy Traitors chat with Fiona, Wednesday’s show spiralled gloriously.

2026-01-15

15 January 2026: Nicole and Natalie Appleton and 2016 Flashbacks

From accidental 2016 archaeology to carrot jeans, Rod Stewart karaoke rumours and a contestant who argued back, Thursday’s show had everything.

2026-01-16

16 January 2026: Harry Letdown, Slippergate and a Surprise from Robbie

No new Harry, unexpected Robbie, slippers in the studio and a Pause for Thought that stopped everyone.

2026-01-19

19 January 2026: AI Ellie panic, slippers banned and Blue Monday rejected

Ellie returns, slippers are exiled, AI nearly steals a job and Blue Monday is firmly refused.

2026-01-20

20 January 2026: A Nation of Owls, Wedgie News and Michaela Strachan

Owl impressions took over Radio 2, Take That reopened old wounds and Michaela Strachan brought the mammals.

2026-01-21

21 January 2026: Playing a blinder, tights on heads and Tony Blackburn joy

Tights-on-head terror, Traitors phrase fatigue, a radio porthole and Tony Blackburn bringing the soul 🎧

2026-01-23

23 January 2026: Harry Styles pop emergency and wrong shoes

A brand new era at 6.30am, sweaty gym memories, shoes on the wrong feet and Big Guest Friday chaos 🎶

2026-01-26

26 January 2026: Admin Wine Night and Zoe Ball Returns

A Radio 2 photo fallout, a communal admin night plan, and Zoe Ball back in the studio.

2026-01-27

27 January 2026: The Birthday Show, the Jumpsuit, and Take That for an Hour

A first birthday, a divisive jumpsuit, reopened wounds and Take That in the studio.

2026-01-29

29 January 2026: Victoria Beckham charts, Jeff decides, Bob Holness

Victoria Beckham resurfaces in the charts, Scott mobilises Jeff-watch, and Elder vs Millennial digs deep.

2026-01-30

30 January 2026: Big Guest Friday chaos, Victoria Beckham and a bath-time quiz

Lionel Blair went to the wrong show, Alan Carr saved a life, and nobody corrected him.

2026-02-03

3 February 2026: Name twins, school awkwardness and saying it out loud

A Tuesday of shared names, shared embarrassment, listener confessions and proper studio chat.

2026-02-04

4 February 2026: Fake jobs, midweek moods and inbox chaos

A Wednesday of imaginary careers, midweek honesty and the usual Breakfast Show back-and-forth.

2026-02-05

5 February 2026: Lilah and Lewis join the Winter Olympics fever

Scott goes full Winter Olympics, fake confidence returns, and Lilah Fear and Lewis Gibson join live from the ice dance world.

2026-02-05

5 February 2026: Mums, social pressure and modern reality

A reflective Thursday morning on motherhood expectations, social media pressure and what real life looks like.

2026-02-06

6 February 2026: Rick Astley at 60, Hamlet, Small Profits and the accidental opera visit

Scott goes to the opera by mistake, Rick Astley celebrates his 60th in style, Riz Ahmed brings a gritty new Hamlet and Mackenzie Crook reveals fortune-telling spirits in a DIY store.

2026-02-09

9 February 2026: Accidental opera, The Sound of Music scandal, and the mailbag opens

Scott hasn’t seen The Sound of Music and went to Salzburg. Nation horrified. Plus the Super Bowl, curling fever, Sheila Diamond and letters from home.

2026-02-10

10 February 2026: Thor steals the Aria, Jemma meets Robbie, and sleep shopping exposed

Chris Hemsworth and Halle Berry steal Scott’s Radio Academy award, Jemma finally meets Robbie Williams, the nation confesses to sleep eating, and the Sound of Music crisis deepens.

2026-02-11

11 February 2026: Natalie Cassidy as Liam Gallagher and Niall Horan on the phone

Wednesday brings fake tan, wrong coats, Myles Smith live in studio with a surprise call to Niall Horan, the Sheila Diamond saga reaches its peak, and Lila Fear and Lewis Gibson prepare to skate for gold.

2026-02-12

12 February 2026: Margot Robbie, Sheila Diamond, and lamb chop sideburns

2026-02-13

13 February 2026: Tinie Tempah’s bathrobes, oat juice, and Peppa Pig’s Diamonds cover

Aberdeen finally sees sun after Scott’s intervention, the Dragons wear bathrobes at lunch to protect their outfits, Sara Pascoe survived cockroaches in Brazil, oat milk is officially cancelled, and Peppa Pig covers Rihanna.

2026-02-16

16 February 2026: Baz Luhrmann on Elvis, Sunscreen 2026, and the world tour that never happened

Baz Luhrmann reveals the crumbling Elvis tapes saved from Kansas salt mines, announces he’ll release a 2026 Sunscreen remix if Scott’s version is good enough, and Olympic parents argue over who changed the nappies.