Innuendo Bingo loses its guest
Thursday’s Innuendo Bingo booking disappeared at the last minute. Rather than cancel the feature, Chris took the most Chris Stark route possible: he sent one group text to virtually every vaguely famous person whose number he had ever acquired and asked whether anybody could get to Radio 1 by 1.45.
Scott hated the lack of control. Chris had not personalised the messages, could not promise anybody was actually coming and had created the possibility that several people might arrive without enough chairs. As replies saying “can’t make it” accumulated, the plan looked increasingly fragile.
Then it worked. Brian Belo, the former Big Brother winner, arrived after abandoning another meeting. Rav Wilding turned up too. Finally Gatis Kandis, the Latvian comedian remembered from Britain’s Got Talent, appeared and immediately started supplying his distinctive anti-jokes.
The result was one of the strangest line-ups the feature had ever assembled, but that was exactly the charm. Brian, Rav, Gatis and Chris squeezed into the plastic-covered studio and worked through Dinner Date, MasterChef, railway documentaries and the usual collection of accidental double meanings. A booking crisis had turned into a one-off “Chris’s phone book” edition.
Greg James knows something is wrong
Greg arrived at the studio already suspicious. He had been told he absolutely had to be present at a particular time to discuss the Radio 1 Teen Awards, the cameras were inexplicably still running and everyone around him was behaving as though there were a secret.
Scott tried to keep talking about the awards. Greg did not believe a word of it. Eventually Scott told him to watch a small monitor in front of him. The picture showed a front door. Greg stared for a moment and then recognised it as his own.
Standing outside was Keith Lemon.
Keith Lemon goes Through the Keyhole for real
The stunt tied into Keith’s new version of Through the Keyhole, but Greg had not been told that his flat would become the set. Keith went inside while Greg remained in the Radio 1 studio watching live.
He inspected the fridge, cupboards, clothes and bedroom, commented on the size and contents of the flat and generally behaved like the least discreet burglar imaginable. Planted surprises made the invasion even stranger; at one point Greg discovered that Alan Dedicoat had somehow been in the flat too.
Greg oscillated between laughter, horror and genuine disbelief. The slow moment when he realised the video really was his own front door was the part Scott enjoyed most, although by the end even Scott wondered whether the team had gone too far.
When Keith finally left, Greg did not immediately relax. He pointed out that a camera being switched off did not prove nobody was still in his home and began considering who at Radio 1 could ever be trusted again.
A house-themed Real or No Real
Alan Dedicoat then walked into the studio, giving Greg the surreal experience of meeting the man who had appeared in his flat earlier. Real or No Real was rebuilt as a Radio 1 presenters’ homes special, with facts and fabricated stories about what might be found in other DJs’ houses.
Greg won the round, which Scott offered as the single positive event in an otherwise destabilising afternoon. The next morning would reveal whether they were still friends.
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