Loughborough’s unofficial anthem
Radio 1’s Happiness Week ended with another play of Loughborough Students’ Union’s version of Naughty Boy’s “La La La”. Scott and Chris had heard it so often that they knew the lyrics, from sports clubs and societies to the promise that students would have the time of their lives.
The video had become a reliable way to improve their mood, and they proposed inviting the performers into the Live Lounge. News that the students were working on a follow-up created some anxiety: the first song had appeared effortless, while a sequel made with full awareness of its audience might never reproduce the same effect.
Celebrity fragrances
The previous day’s fact about Beyoncé’s perfume allergy opened a wider investigation into celebrity scents. Scott objected to stars selling fragrances they would never wear themselves and argued that the endorsement should create some obligation to use the product.
Listeners supplied examples ranging from David Beckham and Jennifer Lopez to a cologne based on the television series 24. The Only Way Is Essex reportedly had its own perfume as well. Chris admitted that even if a celebrity fragrance smelled good, many people would probably conceal its identity when asked what they were wearing.
Chris wants a tickling arrangement
Chris had discovered that lightly tickling the inside of his own forearm did not feel as pleasant as somebody else doing it. Without a partner, he needed a friend willing to provide the sensation without interpreting it as affectionate or sexual. Scott thought asking a colleague for an arm tickle was plainly strange, but Chris believed radio could help make it socially acceptable.
Listeners revealed their own versions. One family compared flowers and household ornaments to find the best tickler, while another person folded paper into a suitable edge. A former pupil admitted paying a girl £2 for ten minutes of arm tickling at school. Gary Lucy later demonstrated a game in which somebody moved a pen slowly along the forearm and the player tried, usually unsuccessfully, to identify the exact point at which it reached the elbow.
Chris had already tested the proposal around the office. His first colleague reluctantly stroked his arm while trying to continue working and said it became uncomfortable whenever he remembered what he was doing. Another agreed too enthusiastically, which Chris rejected because the giver was supposed to perform a neutral favour rather than enjoy it. A third complained that the request interfered with using both hands for work and described Chris’s arm as unusually moist.
The experiment did not normalise anything. It left Chris effectively advertising for a “tickle buddy”, while Scott concluded that the original social barrier probably existed for a reason.
Older or Newer
Coolio’s unexplained chart success in Costa Rica inspired Older or Newer, a journey through surprising current hits around the world. Danny Howard had to decide whether each successive song was older or newer than the one before it.
Phil Collins’ 1984 single “Against All Odds” was number 16 in Laos. Ukraine offered Evanescence’s 2003 “Bring Me to Life”, Ghana had Seal’s 1994 “Kiss from a Rose”, and Leona Lewis’s 2007 “Bleeding Love” sat in Zimbabwe’s chart. Honduras was still buying the 1975 Queen classic “Bohemian Rhapsody”, while Malta supplied Loreen’s 2012 Eurovision winner “Euphoria”.
Sri Lanka had Adele’s “Someone Like You”, Ghana returned with Lionel Richie’s 1984 “Hello”, and Lithuania contributed Chris Isaak’s “Wicked Game”. Danny correctly judged every comparison. The game gave Scott an excuse to fill an afternoon on Radio 1 with records several decades older than its normal playlist, while repeatedly reassuring management that each really was in a current chart.
Reduced food and Real or No Real
Producer Clara had witnessed shoppers following a supermarket worker who was applying reduced-price stickers. A fight broke out over discounted fish, and listeners reported similar incidents involving one-penny bread and a tug of war over a French stick. The pursuit of a yellow “whoops” sticker could turn an ordinary late-night shop into competitive sport.
Gary Lucy played Real or No Real. Harry Styles did not need somebody to tickle him awake, despite the transcript repeatedly substituting Diana Vickers for his name. London Grammar had not described “Nightcall” as their happiest song, but it really had remained illegal to be an “incorrigible rogue” until the previous year.
Morgan Freeman genuinely fell asleep on camera during a promotional interview for Now You See Me. The footage showed Michael Caine continuing to discuss the film while Freeman sat motionless with his eyes closed. Danny Howard won the round 20–10, completing a Friday built from strange charts, supermarket conflict and an office experiment that had embarrassed Chris exactly as much as Scott expected.
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