Chris wanted a job at Scott’s future wedding
Chris asked for an update on Scott’s wedding planning because, despite the engagement celebrations, he had not yet been assigned a role.
Scott admitted there were no firm plans and joked that he was enjoying stretching out the engagement because every stage brought cards, flowers and presents.
Chris offered to perform the same important duty Scott had once given him at his own wedding.
Scott reminded him that the “role” had mainly involved handing out hand fans because the venue was hot.
Chris had apparently been sold this at the time as a meaningful responsibility.
Rachel’s half-mile hook-up involved Banksy
Hook-up Higher or Lower opened with Rachel, whose glamorous life and cold-water swimming made Scott and Chris assume she had travelled thousands of miles for romance.
Her actual distance was half a mile.
She had met a man at a festival in France, only to discover months later that back in Britain they lived just streets apart.
During a night at his home, he disappeared for a while and later returned.
Rachel said the man was a graffiti artist.
More than that, she claimed he was Banksy.
She said she knew his identity and had once possessed a letter from him.
Unfortunately for anybody hoping for proof, she had burned it.
Sarah managed three dates in less than 24 hours
Sarah had turned online dating into a tour of Yorkshire and the surrounding area.
After leaving a long relationship, she arranged multiple meetings across Chesterfield, Wakefield and Sheffield.
Within less than 24 hours she had seen three different men and clocked up around 155 miles.
Scott described it less like dating and more like an organised regional tour.
Daniel’s date wanted to sleep through the zoo
The final story came from Daniel, who had travelled around 20 miles for a meeting at Colchester Zoo.
The man seemed nice but repeatedly commented on how tired he was.
Every sleeping animal became an opportunity to say how much he wished he could do the same.
After the zoo they went back to his place, put on a film and ordered food.
Before the takeaway arrived, the man fell completely asleep.
Daniel could not wake him and eventually called a friend for help getting home.
The intended hook-up never happened.
The day’s total was only 176 miles, but it included Banksy, three men in one day and a date defeated by the sloth enclosure.
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