Union J rearrange the rules
Union J arrived with “Tonight (We Live Forever)”, a new label and work under way on their second album. JJ Hamblett, Josh Cuthbert, George Shelley and Jaymi Hensley were also willing to play Innuendo Bingo, but a listener named Jack proposed a formation nobody had tried.
The four members stood in a line facing Chris, each taking the water fired by the person ahead before rotating position. Scott called the arrangement a human centipede; a kinder description was a very wet caterpillar. Either way, it ensured that Union J soaked one another as thoroughly as they soaked Chris.
The clips featured footballers slapping cheeks, Tracy Austin going deep and hard into a brown patch, an uncomfortably tight bungee harness and a large archaeological dig. Gemma Cairney’s floral jumpsuit blended into a carpet, Mary Berry discussed a deep ring, a straw went up the bottom on This Morning and Elaine Paige caught a glimpse of Douglas’s Wonka.
Chris prepares to leave Europe
Chris had booked a two-week trip to Bali, his first major journey beyond familiar European resorts. Excitement was competing with an expanding list of fears: injections, strange food, the sea, sharks, jungle, rivers, monkeys, spiders and Bali belly.
He thought The Beach had been filmed there, although it was made in Thailand, and took comfort from reports that McDonald’s could be delivered. The Gili Islands were on the itinerary, but anything resembling a monkey sanctuary remained firmly excluded.
Rhianna Dhillon reviews the week’s films
With Greg occupied by G in the Park, Rhianna Dhillon handled the film discussion. Transformers: Age of Extinction was far too long. She enjoyed Keira Knightley and Mark Ruffalo in Begin Again, even if its lyrics were excessively sugary, and recommended How to Train Your Dragon 2.
Scott enjoyed the classier atmosphere of film criticism and asked whether Rhianna could return regularly. She replied that he had a gift for zapping the life out of films, which complicated the proposed arrangement.
A barber feels betrayed
Chris confessed to his barber Andy that another man had cut his hair. Andy hung up and then ignored the return call. Listeners suggested peace offerings including beer, golf balls and a formal apology, while Scott treated the episode as a relationship crisis rather than a routine service decision.
At G in the Park, Greg’s belongings had been soaked and his wake-up involved a zip wire and a super-soaker. Bombay Bicycle Club were among the visitors. After Union J’s rotating water line, the week appeared to have adopted saturation as its governing principle.
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