Chris wakes Grimmy with Jessie J and a megaphone
Scott’s second Breakfast cover opened with Chris questioning whether shorts were professional enough for work and Scott proposing a party for all 800,000 of his Twitter followers if he ever reached that total. A neighbour’s barbecue then left Scott wondering whether wine would be enough to justify inviting himself over despite barely knowing the people next door. Listeners agreed that bringing alcohol was the essential rule, while the team also discussed dangerously long naps in parks and Chris’s mosquito-bitten attempt to sleep on a sunlounger in Zante.
The Posh Radio 4 Lady read messages about French versions of pop songs, miniature toiletries and a listener leaving for a year of teaching in Namibia. One correspondent offered Chris control of her dormant Twitter account, but he initially rejected the extra work before reconsidering how easily he could fill it with television opinions and food photographs. Another proposed turning Chris’s old novelty-pen idea into a business called Stark Naked, a name the team liked enough to save.
Scott decided Nick Grimshaw was being too relaxed about taking over the Breakfast Show on 24 September and sent Chris to begin his early-morning training. Armed with a megaphone and Jessie J’s “Nobody’s Perfect”, Chris stood beneath Grimmy’s bedroom window, called his name and played the song until a sleepy Grimmy opened the window in a scruffy T-shirt. Chris leaned inside, made sure he was fully awake and invited himself in, although Grimmy immediately announced that he planned to return to bed.
Fazer returned after guest-hosting the final Fun and Filth Cabaret and remembered the trip as a rare holiday from his usual life in the studio. He discussed the video for “Killer”, his determination to make a more personal second single and the tracks his production company had submitted for Rihanna, having already co-written Tulisa’s “Young” and co-produced Dappy’s “No Regrets”. Scott then inserted Barry Morgan’s organ introduction at the beginning of “Killer”, leaving Fazer laughing at a collaboration he had just said he would never make.
The team tested Google’s autocomplete suggestions for Fearne Cotton, Nick Grimshaw, David Beckham, Professor Green, Diana Vickers and Danny Howard, finding that searchers mainly wanted to know whether famous people were single, married or gay. Beccy arrived in a police hat for Innuendo Bingo, where clips involved cricket teams nailing the tail end, Dick Foxton, somebody coming out in a seaside semi and Olympic commentary about beating off two Jamaicans. The familiar Joan Collins clip about pouring champagne over her kumquats closed the game.
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