Scott had developed vaccine jealousy
More of Scott’s friends were receiving their first coronavirus vaccinations.
He was genuinely pleased for them.
He was also slightly jealous.
What annoyed him most was how casually some people mentioned it.
A friend might simply text:
“Had the vaccine by the way.”
Scott had already imagined his own appointment as an event.
What would he wear?
How would he celebrate?
Would there be a photograph?
Chris said Scott had never been especially good at seeing other people experience something first without immediately wanting his turn.
The Radio 1 toilets were nearly ready
Another major piece of infrastructure news concerned the eighth-floor toilets at Broadcasting House.
They had been undergoing refurbishment for months.
Scott and Chris had been forced to use toilets on other floors and, in Scott’s telling, this had become a major workplace inconvenience.
An internal email suggested the work was finally almost complete.
The reopening was immediately treated with the seriousness of a major public building.
The show would soon be planning a ceremony.
Lockdown holiday fantasies went straight to Greece
A listener was asked where they would be if travel were suddenly possible.
The answer was somewhere Greek.
That was enough for Scott and Chris to begin mentally rebuilding an entire holiday.
Mythos.
The sea.
Every useful person in the phone contacts.
And food.
Scott became particularly excited about saganaki, fried Greek cheese, including versions with prawns.
Chris barely remembered it.
Scott remembered it with the intensity of somebody who had been denied foreign holidays for a year.
Panpipes entered the fantasy as the required soundtrack.
Conor Coady and Tyrone Mings faced difficult questions
The show also replayed part of Lolathon involving England footballers Conor Coady and Tyrone Mings.
The game was Honest Answers to Difficult Questions.
Each could pass a question.
But passing meant the next question became harder.
Coady was asked who he thought he might have been in a past life.
Another challenge required him to explain the offside rule while replacing the word “ball” with sausage.
Tyrone was asked which teammate’s looks he would swap with.
He joked that it definitely would not be John McGinn, then explained that being instantly recognisable everywhere could make normal life difficult.
Tyrone’s calm became the title
The feature’s lasting soundbite was Tyrone’s relaxed delivery.
After the intensity of Lolathon, vaccine envy, toilets and imaginary Greek holidays, the instruction was perfectly timed:
relax.
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