Capital Summertime Ball 2024

[Riz]

Shiver me timbers! Its National talk like a Pirate Day everyone, I hope you are all in suitable character folks. Arr!

<b>There Were 3 in a Bed…</b>

No one has a clue whats going on, but Jo Whiley was in her negligee in Scott’s company earlier today. Some would say they thought the day would never come. Scott and Chappers had (matching) pyjamas on, bless. So, to sum up, Scott, Jo, Chappers and a busty blonde where in bed all afternoon together. And it was being filmed btw… he’s telling us we’d find out in a few weeks time, but im not sure anyone wants to! Apparently Scott and Chappers looked like Elton John and David Furnish together, I wonder who was who?

<b>Flirt Divert… Read by Davina McCall!</b>

Davina’s on the phone with the texts to the flirt divert number this week. She does them in funny voices too, and adds her own spin to it. Here’s a few if you missed it, to get your juices flowing…

<i>“Hi poo bear, fancy another night with tigger, cos tigger loves bouncing. Call me! Xx”

“Don’t I get a reply? You weren’t shy with me last night!”

“Hey Pete, thanks for meeting me 4 lunch at Harvey Nichols … youre SO sexy!”</i>

Our, oh so forward, general public there.

<b> Go To University Single…</b>

Lots of people are starting university soon, and so are heading off to freshers week about now. They’ve probably just had the “chat” with their other half about how they can make their long distance relationship work. But will it work? It’s a big no no from Scott. He thinks there really is no point in continuing the relationship, it will only end in tears. Think of it… the clubs, gigs, alcohol, fit boys and girls… what are the chances of them not, drunkenly or otherwise, copping off with someone? Just call it a day before they do the dirty on you.

In fact, if you cast your mind back to Laura’s Diary, youll remember Ben dumped Laura to go to university as a single man. Harsh it may seem, but a wise choice in Scott’s books!

One listener, Emily, is on, backing Scott up on this. Her boyfriend went to university 2 years ago and slept with 4 other people… see, it doesn’t work.

Scott’s pearls of wisdom for this week: Go to university single, kids!

<b>Another ‘Hey There Delilah’ Spoof</b>

Havent yet done a Hey There Delilah spoof and whacked it up on youtube? Youre a right LOSER then! Seems absolutely everyone is doing them, and of all musical abilities. Some good, some really quite scary. Theres a new one up just now, taking the pee out of Harry Potter fans. Although, even they quite enjoyed it, and that’s saying something, you know how touchy they can be!

You can find the song at <url>http://www.myspace.com/jamesatwar</url>

<b>Pet Technology</b>

The Japanese, surprisingly, are inventing all sorts of new technology for your dog or cats.

Theres a new mobile out, called petcell, and it’s a mobile for your dog... It hangs round its neck, and you can call it whenever just to make sure its ok. I mean, I don’t think it has a full blown conversation with you or anything, but it might bark a bit and it’ll put your mind at rest. Chappers does raise a good question though: How does it answer the phone? Well, tbh, I doubt it gets up on its back paws and answers it, Scott says he reckons it’ll just automatically answer.

Feeling left out because you’ve got a cat? Not to worry! Buy this handy cat translation device, hold it up to your cat when it meows, and you’ll get a nifty translation of what your cat just said. Its in Japanese though, so there may be some language barriers there...

<b>Other news…</b>

Chappers has a teacher/parent meeting tonight at his sons school. And he doesn’t want to go because it clashes with the football (evidently, a caring father!). Scott suggested he goes. Not only does chappers get to watch the footie, but Scott gets to drink free wine with some teachers!

Debbie Harrie is on tonight from 9pm as part of Radio 1 Established 1967, aaand don’t forget to vote for Scott for the Loaded Lafta awards!