Chris wore a Watford shirt to work
Chris turned up at Radio 1 in a football shirt and immediately attracted attention in the BBC canteen.
One member of staff called colleagues out individually to show them what a “proper football team” looked like.
The colleagues did not appear remotely interested.
Scott was uneasy about the whole concept of wearing a club shirt to work.
Radio 1 had essentially no dress code.
Chris argued that introducing one simply because he had worn Watford colours would be a dangerous precedent.
The Cuffing Queen reached date five
Kate returned with the next section of the 38-date chart.
Date five was Chris.
Kate’s notes immediately focused on his appearance.
His shoes were dirty.
His haircut needed work.
He had described himself as a policeman but was actually a PCSO, which Scott treated as the kind of small first-date exaggeration people might let slide.
The shoes produced a bigger conversation.
Kate said footwear was one of the first things she noticed about a potential date.
Women listening agreed.
The condition and style of someone’s shoes could suggest how much effort they had made and, in Kate’s view, how generally put-together they were.
Chris looked down at his own dirty shoes and became noticeably less confident.
Later dates brought more memorable clothing, including sandals Kate could not get past.
The diary was proving that sometimes a relationship could effectively end at ankle level.
The Newsbeat WhatsApp challenge became increasingly stupid
Listeners continued revealing the oddly specific WhatsApp groups they had with friends.
Dave described a group based around Radio 1 jingles.
He and a colleague had started by sending each other voice notes imitating the Newsbeat sting.
Then they did the same with Clara Amfo’s name.
Eventually the game stopped needing to resemble anything real.
They simply invented phrases which had the rhythm of Radio 1 jingles and sent them backwards and forwards.
Scott loved the level of effort being put into a joke which made almost no sense outside the friendship group.
DJ Khaled sold furniture
The programme also browsed DJ Khaled’s furniture range.
For somebody associated with enormous motivational statements, expensive cars and constant declarations of being “the best”, the idea of Khaled-branded home furnishings already seemed plausible.
Scott and Chris examined the designs and imagined how much of DJ Khaled’s personality could realistically be communicated through chairs and tables.
Peter Crouch tested whether he was funny outside football
Peter Crouch had built a reputation as one of football’s funniest personalities.
Radio 1 decided to test that reputation under deliberately bad conditions.
They sent him into a pub with a list of terrible football jokes.
Crouch approached strangers and asked whether he could tell them one.
The material included obvious penalty and goalkeeper wordplay.
Some people laughed politely.
Some barely reacted.
Scott and Chris were delighted by the awkwardness.
A famous former England striker was standing in an ordinary pub telling jokes so weak that nobody could rely on celebrity status to rescue them.
Crouch still committed to the task.
The experiment did not prove he was the funniest man in sport.
It did prove he was willing to walk up to strangers and risk looking extremely unfunny on Radio 1.
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