Category: News
The judges forget again
The X Factor produces another week of uncertain names. Sharon Osbourne introduces Saara Aalto only as “the songbird from abroad”, then turns to Louis Walsh for help remembering Finland.
Scott and Chris question how judges can mentor contestants without knowing their names, although Louis has previous experience of forgetting the members of large groups. The programme's awkwardness becomes useful evidence for a wider discussion about viewers who cannot tolerate television [...]
The NG Memorial Cup begins
Charles returns on the night of his elaborate FIFA tournament. The players will arrive as managers, hold press conferences and compete after a full buffet, but the programme has concentrated on the promised opening ceremony.
Olympic champion Greg Rutherford introduces John Barrowman, who hands over to Clive Tyldesley for a grand commentary about the fictional stadium and the competition's history. Charles is genuinely impressed that the programme followed through and p [...]
Proudlock and Boulle return
Oliver Proudlock and Francis Boulle visit as Made in Chelsea begins its twelfth series. Chris remembers being moved away when he tried to approach Proudlock at a nightclub appearance, while Francis's return to the programme supplies enough relationship complications for Scott's introduction.
Their three-way Innuendo Bingo with Chris begins more quietly than expected. The guests try to retain their composure until a sword-making explanation about heating metal and remo [...]
More jobs face the verdict
After an environmental health officer narrowly earns “hot job” status, more listeners ask for rulings. Richard turns wood into bowls, table legs and spindles, while Kerry fits kitchens and bathrooms and enjoys surprising customers who did not expect a woman to arrive.
Both are approved, but the third caller changes the feature. Sarah runs Twisted Fondant in Winchester, a separate x-rated bakery created so her specialist work would not alarm her ordinary cake customers. [...]
An award presentation that never arrives
Scott attends the Attitude Awards and sits beside Rebecca Ferguson, who feels unwell and asks whether he can present her award if she leaves early. He agrees before asking which award or when it will happen.
For the next hour he waits tensely for his name to be called, but no request ever comes. The ceremony ends without Rebecca's mysterious presentation, leaving Scott unsure whether the plan changed or never existed.
Romesh enters the wet area
Romesh Ran [...]
The rehearsal that never happened
Listeners demand an update from Steph after Friday's promise to rehearse her Halloween costume alone. She happily returns, only to admit that a night out on Friday led to her sleeping through almost all of Saturday.
The outfit was never tested and no party conditions were recreated. Steph regards the sleep as lovely rather than a failure, while Scott and Chris enjoy how completely the detailed plan collapsed once an ordinary weekend intervened.
Judge Rinder beco [...]
Busted improves another commute
Listener Zoe follows Chris's technique of timing a train exit to a Busted chorus. She crosses between trains on the Jubilee line as “Sleeping with the Light On” reaches its big moment, then carries the confidence into a successful interview.
Her commitment to Busted is already established: when she could not obtain a Hyde Park ticket, she took a bar job at the event instead. Scott and Chris accept that the cinematic commute works beyond Pinner and may genuinely im [...]
A highly visible wardrobe failure
Chris begins the programme by admitting that his trousers have split at the back. His attempt to move sideways around the glass-walled studio has merely shown the damage to everybody walking past.
The alternatives include gym shorts, working in his vest and pants, or a mysterious pair of very small red shorts found beneath Scott's desk. Listeners predictably favour the least dignified option, but Chris refuses to investigate which former guest might have left th [...]
Student unions enter the charts
After revisiting Loughborough Students' Union's version of Five's “Keep On Movin'”, Scott and Chris discover that Teesside University has produced something even more ambitious. Its elected officers promote union services while introducing themselves individually over a specially written song.
Vice-presidents Georgina, Adam and Aimee deliver lines about welfare, education and activities with varying relationships to the original tune. Chris is due to DJ at Teessid [...]
Freshers' flu meets a blender
Chris tries to repair his fading voice after the freshers tour by buying kale, cucumber, celery, apples and limes. The blender has returned from beneath the sink, although Scott doubts that one virtuous morning will reverse the previous week.
They also remain fascinated by Britney Spears's British television appearances. Her visit to Loose Women produces a personalised mug and the question of whether its presenters really are “loose women”, extending Chris's renewed [...]