Zofia had made her decision
The show called Zofia after the final Granny Tinder.
Her grandmother Lynette had chosen Harry.
Zofia liked plenty about him, including the travel, the intelligence and the photography.
She still said no.
She explained that she was happy being single and wanted to “do me”.
Scott and Chris were appalled from a radio-feature perspective.
After years of Granny Tinder, the grand finale had still failed to produce a date.
Zofia admitted she had dated outside the feature anyway, which made the whole project feel even more gloriously futile.
James the PI was back on duty
Another old favourite then returned.
James the private investigator had appeared on the programme as a genuine working PI and had always attracted a degree of listener suspicion simply because his job required him to be secretive.
Scott and Chris stressed again that he really was a private investigator, not an actor invented for radio.
James explained that people had not stopped being unfaithful, suspicious or secretive since his last appearance.
His latest work even included stalking badgers, exactly the sort of detail which made the show’s decision to keep a private investigator on call feel so strange.
There was still plenty to investigate.
For a period, the show had effectively had a private investigator on call, one of those details which sounded absurd once they said it out loud.
The final quiz closed another regular feature
Thursday also contained the last ever quiz.
The game had become a regular part of the programme during the long pandemic shows and then simply stayed because listeners enjoyed playing along.
Scott and Chris ended with a full house in the final round, giving the feature a neat finish.
Producer Amy was thanked for turning something created to fill unusually long programmes into a reliable part of the daily show.
Unofficial Mills got a farewell shout-out
Among the listener voice notes at the beginning of the programme was a message from Jono at Unofficial Mills wishing Scott and Chris luck with their new shows.
Scott immediately recognised the site and described it as one of the long-standing fan pages which had been there for years.
Chris called it an “OG” site.
They wondered on air whether the website would carry on after they left Radio 1.
By this stage, the programme was not only saying goodbye to its own features.
It was acknowledging the listener communities which had grown around the show as well.
COMMENTS