Love Day chooses student radio
Chris had become obsessed with Ted Loveday’s instant “hapax legomenon” answer in the University Challenge final. Loveday had retweeted him, so Chris sent a direct message asking him to join Radio 1 that afternoon.
Loveday already had a commitment to Lunchtime with Lily on Cambridge student station Cam FM. Scott and Chris watched its studio webcam, played pieces of the interview and complained that he had chosen Lily over them.
Listeners admired Loveday for honouring the booking rather than abandoning student radio for a national station. Radio 1’s team continued trying to reach him after the programme ended.
Laura Whitmore returns to Bingo
Laura Whitmore arrived from Coachella and returned the tuxedo T-shirt she had borrowed after a previous game. She was willing to hand it back until everybody agreed that it had become part of her own wardrobe, while Chris offered a Watford shirt as that day’s dry replacement.
The show played her Loveday’s answer. Laura found intelligence attractive, wanted to meet him and liked the possibility of becoming “Laura Loveday”. She proposed “hapax legomenon” as the only chat-up line he would need.
Laura and Chris then faced clips of Ruth Langsford promising to get her knockers out, Stacey Dooley saying that swallowing sounded horrific and a football pundit going to pull Willian off. Other clips concerned celebrities’ love of eating out, sucking rather than blowing into a recorder and a bungee-jump harness being too tight.
Laura attacked the game with her usual enthusiasm and repeatedly moved close to spray Chris directly. He finished drenched and admitted that she remained one of the strongest guests.
The Loveday interview
Ted Loveday finally became available after the Cam FM appearance. He explained that a hapax legomenon was a word appearing only once in a book, body of writing or author’s work.
He had learned the term as a piece of strange trivia about three years earlier and immediately recognised the unfinished question. The small smile after his answer came from knowing how improbably clever the moment looked.
Winning brought no cash and no personal trophy. The college received the prize, while Loveday received sudden attention, two Instagram fan accounts and people repeating a phrase he had slightly mispronounced under pressure.
Scott played him Laura’s comments and suggested “Laura Loveday”. Ted cautiously acknowledged the message, while Chris proposed that he walk into clubs and use the Greek term as an opening line.
The show then started a campaign to place him on the Big Weekend stage. Scott warned against committing too far in advance because the internet’s intense interest might have moved elsewhere by May.
Joanne will dance with somebody else
Chris noticed that Joanne Clifton had been confirmed for another series of Strictly Come Dancing. Scott had remained in contact with his former partner and felt uncomfortable imagining her dancing with a new celebrity.
He was also disturbed to learn that he had disappeared from her Twitter header, although he remained among a collage of memories. Joanne had once threatened to kill Scott if he danced with anybody else, which he considered sufficient reason not to retaliate.
Greg James plays Real or No Real
Greg joined a competitive edition of Real or No Real. Cher Lloyd really had become the 13th British person to reach seven million Twitter followers, and adding a smiley face to a restaurant bill genuinely increased tips in one study.
Scott’s car did not have a factory cassette deck, despite everybody finding that plausible. A calculation that Bruce Wayne required at least $79m to fund Batman’s home and equipment was real.
Scott achieved a full 40 points against Greg’s 10. He then announced a week away, followed by a return on the Radio 1 Breakfast Show, leaving Ted Loveday’s phrase as the month’s final great discovery.
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