Lucinda

She looked a state at Glastonbury when I walked past her performing on my way to find some food. She was chain smoking the whole way through and her hair looks really fake.

I had to carry 2 huge tins of Roses chocolates home. I think there's some toffees in there. It's cruel really, my boss entrusted me with the chocolate, because she knows I can't eat it. Tomorrow I have to carry them all the way to Leicester. I have to be up at 6am tomorrow because I have to somehow get to St Pancras for 8am but the bloody First Crapital Connect trains aren't running properly because the wankers don't employ enough staff so I'll have to attempt the tube.

Bring back Mills and Spoon!

Awww that's rubbish and makes no sense some people are just irrational and selfish. Yesterday I didn't go to work because I felt sick and weak and my stomach really hurt because of the antidepressants fucking up my IBS. Today I struggled into work and my colleagues ignored me and I had nothing to do all day. It doesn't look like I'll have anything to do tomorrow. It's all getting to me at the moment and I'm struggling to motivate myself to get out of bed, it doesn't help when people are like that. Sure, it sounds great, getting paid to do nothing, but I have to look busy so I read these horrible complex government reports on climate change related crap, but it doesn't help to take my mind off things so my mind wanders and makes me feel more depressed. Also the net amount I end up earning after tax and transport costs is less than £30 a day and I'd rather be in bed.

Happy birthday Nik. I won't call you old, cos I can barely remember turning 19

Aww sorry to hear that Grace. If it's any consolation, they rejected me too (4 years ago-now I feel old)

What have they done? does it stop you coming along? Excepting serious transport or health problems, or other circumstances beyond my control, I shall be there. I don't know Manchester that well, I've only been there once, I am guessing we're meeting at the train station though? Manchester Piccadilly. That's where my train comes into, anyway. At about 1pm ish I think.

Thanks, that's probably good advice, since a 'common' side effect is suicide attempts. I don't think I'm even depressed. I know 2 people who've taken them with minimal side effects. I guess I read the side effects and imagine having them all at once. So far it's ok, I only took half a tablet today though. I actually don't feel like crying, for the first time this week, but that might have changed naturally. My stomach is sore which I think is related but hopefully that won't get too bad.

The doctor prescribed me citalopram (antidepressant) to try to control my anxiety. The list of side effects is terrifying and I'm pretty sure it's going to mess up my already messed up digestive system. But I can't live with this anxiety because nothing causes it, I feel it all the time and it's making me feel terrible. I'm trying to be brave and just take the meds and cope with whatever side effects I experience, but work isn't the best place to be finding that out and at the moment they're making my anxiety worse

Happy birthday hope you're enjoying it.

Happy birthday, I hope it's a good one.

Has the increase in your medication helped at all? Panic is horrible, it feeds on itself because the fear of having a panic attack makes you feel more anxious. Feels like you can't win. It's also really sad that someone you were close to can make you feel that shit.

Hehe Helen I think I can guess too... I'm glad there's some other people coming, cos I don't want to end up spending the day wandering round Manchester on my own - wouldn't want to waste the tickets I've bought.

This week I feel like crying all the time. I can't concentrate on work. When I was at uni I was able to just take time off and not bother doing anything during weeks like this, but I don't have that option now. I'm really scared about what I've got myself into and I want to run away from it all. I haven't got the support I had when I was at uni either. I'm really really terrified of life right now and can't cope. I don't feel able to take on a proper job because of the times I get like these. I get like this more often in the winter and we're only in November so it's only likely to get worse :(

Congrats it feels really weird to not have them on your teeth any more. I was very very happy when I got rid of mine, I was 17 as well, it's not nice because most people seem to have them when they're 12. Just remember to wear your retainers.

I don't know what you're refering to here and I've never bothered to watch these X Factor fools. I'm just that culturally out of touch. Honestly, am I missing out?

Couldn't care less. In 6 months time no one will remember who they are. Also confused as to why no one else in this thread has answered with 3 words.

Happy slightly belated birthday!

Today I managed to log in to the Student Finance site for the first time since March 2007. I've been locked out for the past 2 and a half years. My debt stands at: £20,047.27

Would you not have some difficulty getting music onto it if you don't have a computer of your own? If it's only charging that's an issue you can generally get wall charger kind of adaptors for them. I'd recommend getting a Sony instead. My Sony is drag and drop which means you don't need any awkward software like iTunes, you just drag the stuff you want like onto it like you would to a USB stick. Or you can get cheap, low capacity mp3 players from pretty much anywhere for about £20 if you just want something to listen to while running, for example. No need to splash out £200 on an iPod if it's not what you need

Yeah it is bloody freezing, it's fair enough to be cold. I find I feel more cold when I'm lacking sleep. Last night my parents had a go at me about not spending enough time with my sister. It's a complex situation but I tried to argue my case with logic and common sense. Big mistake! It made me very stressed and I struggled to sleep, was awake most of the night and restless. I'm already seriously sleep-deprived. My reaction to all this is to try really hard to move out as soon as possible.

I think he just likes to wear rings to encourage gossip like this keep people guessing...

me too, and I wake up feeling exhausted In my dreams I'm running around really stressed and everything's going wrong. Or sometimes I have upsetting dreams where people die. Far too often I dream that someone's trying to kill me. I guess it's a manifestation of stress and anxiety. Do you know what might be causing yours?

At the moment I'm on a temporary contract. Today my boss told me in an email that they want to give me a permanent job because the directors are impressed with the work I've done. It's great news in this economic situation but I have to consider my options, whether I should do a Masters to improve my long term prospects and also try to negotiate a salary that I could theoretically afford to live in London on.

It seems to me like it isn't entirely positive, but to me it seemed like he's bitter, watching lots of happy couples holding hands while he is single and lonely. The antidepressants thing could fit I suppose. It's all about how you interpret songs yourself though, what they mean to you, so most people find that song a happy one.