Will had ignored all advice to rest his voice
Scott had spoken to listener Will on Monday.
Will had destroyed his voice shouting during England’s previous football match.
The programme advised him to rest.
Then England played again.
By Thursday, his voice was considerably worse.
Will had apparently spent the semi-final surrounded by pints and shouting.
Scott could barely understand him.
That meant there was only one responsible thing to do:
make him sing.
Beyoncé became the vocal stress test
Scott prepared deliberately difficult songs.
Will’s vocal range had already collapsed.
Now he was asked to keep going through high notes.
The most ambitious test was Beyoncé’s Listen.
The resulting performance was somewhere between singing, croaking and a medical warning.
Scott and Chris loved it.
They then told Will to stop speaking until Sunday so he would have at least some chance of recovering before the final.
Wimbledon meant Animal Tennis could return
The tennis was back.
So was one of the show’s most ridiculous games.
Scott and Chris had long noticed that some professional tennis grunts sound remarkably like animals.
Animal Tennis asks callers to identify which is which.
Listener Megan joined the game alongside clips labelled as players, cats, goats, elephants and other creatures.
A noise Megan thought might be a cat was actually Maria Sharapova.
Another apparent animal turned out to be a tennis player.
A goat was, reassuringly, actually a goat.
Scott built impossible rallies
Once the individual noises had been identified, the show started combining them.
Sharapova versus a church dog.
A ring-tailed cat versus a pig.
A fox versus another tennis player.
The added racket noises made the whole thing sound unnervingly convincing.
Scott declared it exactly the kind of content the BBC existed to make.
Scott and Chris nearly booked the same caravan park
Bangers caller Demi revealed she was heading to a caravan park.
That prompted the presenters to discover both had their own caravan holidays planned.
For a moment they worried they might accidentally end up in the same place.
Scott was going to the New Forest later in the summer.
Demi’s trip was somewhere else.
The accidental group holiday was avoided.
Strictly Pro or Boxer and assembly anthems closed the quiz
Don’t Look It Up used Strictly Pro or Boxer.
Artem Chigvintsev went into the Strictly column.
Vasiliy Lomachenko belonged to boxing.
Then came school-assembly songs including One More Step Along the World I Go, Morning Has Broken and Lord of the Dance.
Scott and Chris knew some of the melodies.
The words had largely disappeared.
The same could not be said for Will’s football shouting, which had apparently used up every remaining part of his voice.
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