Germany kept its promise
England had beaten Germany.
That meant the German radio bet from the previous day had to be settled.
Host Oli returned.
Scott and Chris had told him that *Shout for England* was the country’s great football anthem.
Now the German station had to play it.
They actually did.
Dizzee Rascal and James Corden went out in full to a German audience because Scott and Chris had successfully sold the track as mandatory England celebration music.
Scott could barely believe the joke had travelled all the way through to broadcast.
Oli invited them to Germany anyway
Despite losing the football, Oli remained friendly.
He invited Scott and Chris to Germany for food and beer.
There was even a joke that they could behave like drunken English football hooligans.
Scott pointed out he did not really drink beer and did not fit the stereotype especially well.
The whole exchange had moved from a fake-expert stunt into a genuinely warm bit of international radio.
Granny Tinder received a real relationship dilemma
Lynette returned for her weekly appearance.
The conversation moved quickly from diet, takeaways and portion sizes into advice for listener Olivia.
Olivia had met a man who seemed unusually promising.
She normally liked exciting, adventurous men.
This one appeared to tick all the boxes.
They had been on four or five dates.
He remembered small details, including a university essay deadline.
Then he disappeared.
He was online — but not replying
Three days passed.
Olivia had messaged twice.
The messages remained unanswered even though he appeared active online.
That was the detail which mattered most to Lynette.
Scott and Chris could invent explanations.
Perhaps he was busy.
Perhaps something had happened.
Perhaps he did not know what to say.
Lynette’s advice was much simpler.
Stop chasing him.
If he was interested, he knew how to contact Olivia.
If he was not, there were plenty more fish in the sea.
Lynette remembered dating before blue ticks
The conversation became another comparison between modern dating and the world Lynette had known when she was young.
There had been no read receipts.
No online-status indicators.
No expectation that somebody should reply instantly.
If someone disappeared, the uncertainty existed for different reasons.
Scott and Chris realised technology had not removed romantic confusion.
It had simply created more data for people to obsess over.
Nursery rhymes finished June
Don’t Look It Up returned to childhood material.
One, Two, Three, Four, Five, Once I Caught a Fish Alive appeared.
So did Diddle Diddle Dumpling, My Son John, where John goes to bed with his trousers on.
One Finger, One Thumb, Keep Moving also returned.
Rapper or Accountant made another appearance.
June therefore ended in exactly the programme’s preferred way:
international football diplomacy, grandmotherly dating advice and a serious argument about children’s rhymes.


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