Piers Morgan’s serious face became Scott’s new obsession
Scott had rediscovered publicity photographs of Piers Morgan standing beside criminals and other serious interview subjects.
Because the context was sombre, Piers could not use an ordinary smiling press photograph.
The resulting expression fascinated Scott and Chris.
He looked intensely serious in almost every image.
Scott compared the collection with similar photographs used for prison documentaries and decided the expression itself had become a genre.
The team began imagining using the photographs on birthday cards and Christmas cards simply because the contrast would be so inappropriate.
Funny Business expanded internationally
Tuesday also brought Funny Business.
The show’s supply of British companies with accidentally rude names had not run out, but listeners abroad were now sending possibilities too.
Scott and Chris rang genuine businesses and tried to make ordinary enquiries without laughing at the names.
The format still relied on the same contrast.
The person answering the telephone was doing a completely normal job.
The presenters were behaving like schoolchildren.
Exes became zoo animals
Then the programme picked up a story from America where a zoo allowed people to name cockroaches after former partners around Valentine’s Day.
Scott liked the revenge idea but wanted something more appropriate to the kind of exes listeners were describing.
A snake felt perfect.
Listeners immediately began nominating people.
The reasons ranged from ordinary breakups to cheating.
One person said their ex had cheated with a housemate.
Another said the ex had been unfaithful for years.
The phrase “snake” already existed as relationship language, so the animal required almost no explanation.
A real zoo answered the call
Then somebody from an Essex zoo got in touch.
They had an unnamed python.
Radio 1 could name it.
Scott and Chris now had to select which listener’s ex deserved to become the official snake.
The nominations became darker as the day continued.
Some callers had stories involving multiple partners and close friends.
The show realised it had accidentally created a week-long Valentine’s revenge competition.
Innuendo Bingo was only one day away
The following afternoon would also bring the return of Innuendo Bingo with Davina McCall.
The excitement was already visible in listener messages.
People were moving work meetings and lunch breaks so they could hear it live.
Scott and Chris were proud that the feature had remained associated with their show even while it was away.
By Tuesday evening, Radio 1 had an unnamed python and one of its biggest old features waiting to return.
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