Scott suddenly understood football
Chris was unsettled by the opening of Monday’s show because Scott appeared to understand Watford’s weekend result.
Scott discussed the comeback win over Crystal Palace, Tom Cleverley’s volley and the possibility of European football with enough confidence to sound like somebody who had watched the match.
He had not.
The production team had effectively supplied him with notes.
Scott immediately realised that a one-page football briefing could solve years of awkward conversations with taxi drivers.
Chris was less enthusiastic about a future where Scott could fake being a Watford expert.
Ask Me Anything arrived
The programme also introduced a new feature, Ask Me Anything.
The idea was to find people with unusual jobs, habits or experiences and allow Scott, Chris and listeners to ask the questions politeness would normally prevent.
Rather than pretending not to be curious, Radio 1 would simply ask everything.
The feature would become a regular part of early 2019.
A maid of honour needed emergency help
Listener Anna had been given responsibility for organising a hen weekend involving around 16 women and a couple of men.
She was beginning to panic about keeping everybody entertained for two nights and a day.
Scott and Chris appointed themselves hen-party consultants.
Scott’s basic advice was that everything eventually needed to become deliberately trashy.
Novelty chocolates, ice cubes and the traditional collection of hen-party accessories were encouraged.
Then they began suggesting games.
Pin the Trunks on the Hunk
The title idea was Pin the Trunks on the Hunk.
Print a large photograph of an attractive man, provide small paper swimming trunks and recreate Pin the Tail on the Donkey.
Scott suggested Strictly dancers as suitable hunks.
Other ideas included modelling anatomy from Play-Doh, a chocolate-finger challenge and life drawing.
Chris became increasingly uncomfortable with how much of the planning involved novelty male anatomy.
Listeners were much more useful.
They sent genuine ideas almost immediately.
Anna ended the call with enough options to stop worrying that the weekend would consist of everybody simply sitting in a rented house asking what they should do next.
A naked dad completed the Monday
The programme also heard another listener story involving an unexpectedly naked parent.
It fitted neatly into a show already spending far too long discussing hen-party games.
Scott and Chris had returned from Christmas determined to make 2019 more sophisticated.
By the second Monday, they were planning Pin the Trunks on the Hunk.
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