Radio 1 wanted everybody to clear their lockers
An email had gone around Broadcasting House warning staff that their lockers needed to be emptied by the end of May.
Anything left behind risked being thrown away.
Scott had almost forgotten he had one.
He suspected it had not been opened for around 18 years and imagined glow sticks, old CDs and other remains of previous Radio 1 eras inside.
Chris’s locker was even more interesting because there had been a period when he effectively lived out of the building, sometimes staying in a nearby hostel when covering early shows so he could spend longer going out the night before.
The pair decided the lockers should not simply be cleared.
They should be treated like Storage Wars.
Former DJs’ abandoned lockers could be opened and their contents examined like archaeological finds.
Paddy and Louise played Brother or Lover
The day’s contestants were Paddy, a holiday-park entertainer who could sing, perform magic, do impressions and work with puppets, and Louise, an assistant bar manager who kept three horses.
Scott was delighted by Paddy’s job because as a child he had told his nan he wanted to become either a DJ or a holiday-park entertainer.
The questioning covered television, food, horses and the sort of domestic knowledge which could indicate either a very close family relationship or a couple.
The game once again proved that confidently reading chemistry through a phone line was harder than it sounded.
Big Weekend rumour season officially began
With the festival only days away, Coventry was filling with supposed sightings of artists.
Scott and Chris decided they should contribute their own rumours.
The system was deliberately scientific.
One hat contained Big Weekend artists.
Another contained activities.
A third contained Coventry locations.
Random combinations were then presented as breaking local gossip.
Sam Fender was supposedly recording cringey TikToks outside a buffet restaurant.
Other artists were assigned equally unlikely activities.
Then came the perfect combination:
Calvin Harris — entertaining a lover — in Lady Herbert’s Garden.
Scott was convinced that if repeated often enough, at least one of their invented rumours would escape into the real world.
Manchester United were “rubbish” on BBC News
The programme also enjoyed the genuine story of a trainee learning to operate the BBC News ticker.
Test text including “Manchester United are rubbish” had accidentally appeared live on screen.
The BBC apologised.
Scott and Chris mostly wanted to congratulate the trainee for creating one of the funniest accidental pieces of breaking news in years.
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