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29 September 2021: Everyone went to the Bond premiere except Daniel and Craig

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29 September 2021: Everyone went to the Bond premiere except Daniel and Craig

 

Social media made it look as though the entire country attended Bond

The premiere of No Time to Die had filled everybody’s feeds.

Daniel Craig.

Royalty.

Actors.

Presenters.

Influencers.

Red carpet.

Scott opened Instagram and began feeling as though literally everybody had been invited except him.

Chris had the same experience.

The programme therefore decided to hear from the people who had definitely not been at the premiere.

What did the rest of Britain actually do?

The non-premiere plans were gloriously ordinary

One listener stayed home with a cold, ordered pizza and watched a film.

Someone else had spent the evening cleaning dog diarrhoea from the kitchen.

Emily in Devon ate cinnamon swirls while watching *The Great British Bake Off*.

Another listener reported an extremely unglamorous evening involving beans.

The contrast was exactly what Scott wanted.

Social media had made the Bond premiere look like the centre of the universe.

Most people were at home doing washing-up.

Daniel and Craig finally did go out

Then came the perfect message.

One listener had actually gone out with:

Daniel and Craig.

Not Daniel Craig.

Two separate friends.

One called Daniel.

One called Craig.

They had drinks.

Scott immediately declared this a much better answer to the question than attending the premiere itself.

The podcast title was inevitable.

Rich the service-station king had not been on the red carpet either

The programme checked in with Rich, the motorway-services enthusiast who had become a recurring character during September.

Unsurprisingly, Rich had not been at the Bond premiere.

His world remained motorway services rather than film premieres.

By this point, simply hearing Rich’s name triggered the same excitement as a celebrity guest.

Scott had somehow turned specialist knowledge of service stations into a Radio 1 franchise.

The show gave the Bond glamour a reality check

The whole segment became a reminder of how social media compresses perspective.

A few hundred invited people can make an event look universal if every account posts the same carpet.

The show deliberately created the opposite feed.

Cinnamon swirls.

Sick-day pizza.

Cleaning up after dogs.

Ordinary nights with friends.

And two completely unrelated men called Daniel and Craig.

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