Scott had submitted his hands for judgement
A day after discovering professional hand modelling, Scott sent photographs of his own hands to an expert.
He had started the process with unexpected confidence.
His nails were neat.
His skin looked reasonable.
He had spent years holding microphones and phones without anybody telling him his hands were unacceptable.
The professional response was less encouraging.
The proportions and volume of his fingers were not ideal for the kind of close-up commercial work Scott had imagined.
The verdict punctured his new career almost immediately.
Chris was delighted.
Other listeners had actually done the job
The programme then found people with genuine hand-modelling experience.
One caller, Lars, had moved to Australia and joined an extras agency before being sent to a casting for a beer campaign.
Around 40 men were considered.
Lars had never thought much about his hands until somebody decided they were suitable for advertising.
He received his first manicure and learned how carefully even the act of holding a bottle had to be staged.
The bottle was sprayed to look cold.
His fingers had to sit in exactly the right position.
At one point filming paused because his hands had become wrinkled.
Scott realised professional hand modelling involved far more technique than simply owning attractive fingers.
Mark had applied for almost everything on television
The show then met Mark, who had spent years applying for reality programmes.
His list included First Dates, Take Me Out, Naked Attraction and Gogglebox.
He had even applied to Gogglebox on behalf of his family before properly explaining the idea to them.
Mark reached an interview stage for Naked Attraction.
Producers naturally asked whether he was comfortable getting naked.
The practical reality of family, work and appearing without clothes on national television eventually made him stop short of doing it.
Love Squad got him on screen
Mark’s friend Jack had also applied for MTV dating programme Love Squad.
Mark appeared as part of the group helping Jack find a date.
That gave him at least some of the television experience he had been chasing.
Scott and Chris admired the persistence.
Mark did not seem especially obsessed with one specific format.
He simply wanted to be on television.
The show invited producers looking for enthusiastic contributors to consider him.
Phrases which drove partners mad
The programme also asked listeners for the phrases they deliberately used because they knew they annoyed a partner.
The words themselves could be completely harmless.
The repetition made them unbearable.
Scott and Chris recognised the behaviour immediately.
Once somebody discovered a phrase produced a reaction, it became almost impossible not to keep using it.
Pitbull wisdom returned
The show also revisited old Pitbull motivational clips.
Mr Worldwide had a way of making ordinary motivational statements sound like profound life advice.
Scott enjoyed playing them with enough dramatic music to make each sentence feel like a philosophy lecture.
By Tuesday, Scott had lost his imaginary hand-modelling career.
Mark was still pursuing his television one.
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