The tactical salad
Scott remains concerned that Chris is eating almost every evening meal from the barbecue, still the only cooking equipment in his new house. Chris believes he has solved the nutritional problem by eating a “tactical salad” at lunchtime, allowing him to consume only meat at night.
Breakfast remains less organised and can include leftovers from the previous barbecue. Scott warns that the hot weather will end and a real kitchen will eventually be required, but Chris is determined to use the grill for as long as possible.
Greg James gets the Olympic clips
Greg James joins Chris for Innuendo Bingo on one of the hottest days of the year. The clips include ITV News accidentally directing viewers to a very different website, Olympic table tennis, a weightlifter who preferred the snatch and the continuing question of whether a badger is a giver or receiver.
Greg wears borrowed pyjama bottoms and a Live Lounge shirt, while Chris discovers that the netting inside his swimming shorts offers less protection than expected. Both are drenched, and Greg’s distinctive laugh becomes almost as important as the clips.
Gandalf risks his job
A Bristol Rovers supporter calls while hiding at work. He wants to leave early for the club’s League Cup match at Chelsea but could not book holiday because the fixture was confirmed at short notice. To protect his identity, he chooses the name Gandalf.
Gandalf has spent 24 hours hinting that he feels ill and rehearses a croaky voice with Scott and Chris. They repeatedly tell him that pretending to be sick is wrong and that his performance is not convincing, but he goes into the boss’s office anyway. He claims to be sweating and unable to concentrate, is allowed home and immediately prepares for London. His only remaining problem is avoiding television cameras at the match and explaining why a supposedly ill employee is in the away end.
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