Alright Treacle? How’s it going? Here’s another Tuesday review, this time from me…
The Love Calculator
Remember Scott talking about the Love Calculator? The feature where rather than filling in a few forms about who you fancy and finding how compatible you are, your answers go straight back to the person who sent you the e-mail. This is causing a lot of problems, especially with a girl who sent it to her boyfriend and found out that the first person in this boy’s favourite girls was her best friend. Infact the girl wasn’t even in the top three. He’s now dumped. I tried it today and got ten amusing replies within five minutes. Go on, try it on myspace…
All You Need Is Love… Put your hands up for love…
Scott spent last night gigging for Freshers at the University of Hertfordshire, and tonight will be at the bi-annual DJ dinner at Radio 1. The boss will be showing a special DVD tonight, they’re not sure what it’s about, but he’s hoping it’s nothing too mucky. He recalled the time at his old radio station (he’s been at many) when the managing director showed his staff a video about how to make the radio station better. Just before the end he left the room to take a call, and when it ended the tape switched to a rather gross home video of him making love with the head of music. I wonder how Scott got his job at this station? The station is one which has the strapline of the best mix from the ’80s, 90s and today’. There’ll be a lot of worried managing directors tonight when they go home to their wives. Obviously they all listen to rival radio stations.
Just a pussy from heaven
Although Chris Lee off of Just A Text From Heaven can’t talk to pets form beyond the grave, Scott has finally tracked down someone who can. Not only can they talk to pets from beyond the grave in a Dr Doolittle style, they don’t even have to be dead. Perfect.
Bognor Regis!
And meanwhile, after hearing the new record ‘Put Your Hands Up… For Detriot’, callers poured in to ‘put their hands up’ for a UK city. Cities included Swindon, Gloucester, Barnsley and Rochdale. And strangely, one woman wanted Scott to do one for Detriot, clearly not having heard the record.
And now for a highly creative feature from Chappers… never heard before anywhere!
Put Your Hands Up… for Randy Fanny
And Chappers’ new game continued again today – with Scott and Chopper immaturely calling people with really immature names. Today’s victims were Lavina Nipple, Aleese Wanger and Randy Fanny. One girl heard the feature in the car, saw another girl laughing her head off and so mouthed to the other ‘randy fanny’. The response? The girl stuck her thumb up. Let’s hope she wasn’t listening to some other station.
Random Act of Killing
Rachel from Wisbech sent Scott an e-mail asking if her sisters coud be killed be killed. First sister Joanne used Rachel’s food to cook her own food without cooking for Rachel, and the other changed all her internet passwords to ‘hahaha’. Poor Rachel wasn’t coping, and can’t promise she won’t kill them whilst her parents are away. They also threw a suitcase of her clothes in the pond and took the Sky card out so Rachel can’t watch TV. Will she crack? Who knows!
Lost? I should think so!
It’s the final Lost tonight and tomorrow Scott wants to hear from listeners who found the last of the series boring. Scott doesn’t get Lost, and he doesn’t get The Simpsons either. Chappers loves The Simpsons, but hates Family Guy. Scott loves Family Guy. It’s a match made in heaven.
Anyway, possible story endings include they think there may be a Burger King on the island, and that’s why Hurley is so large.
Chappers: “It could be a food hatch!”
Record of the Week
This week’s Record of the Week is ‘Dirty Old Ann’ and Turn Me On.
Also Today…
Do you remember Scott talking about the Wife Swap USA Pirate and Medieval versions, he still wants to see them! If you know how he can get to see them let him know!
The one that doesn’t speak was just c-c-c-checking it out!
The one that doesn’t speak went to Little Chris’ gig last night. He found it amazing that when he stepped outside the gig all the parents were in cars waiting for their kids to come out.
And after yesterday’s Flirt Divert monkey message, Scott thinks more people should go out with monkeys. As JJ on the forum joked, ‘I thought he prefered bears’.
Second review
Reviewed by hannahisgreat
Today you get two reviews for the price of one. First a strange review from Hannah, and then one from Jono. All part of the service with a smile from Unofficial Mills.
Alright Treac? I am Hannah and I apologise for my inappropriate behaviour last week, you know, coursework smoursework, I begged Jono not to sack me and here I am again. You should be thankful.
Scott Is Being Blackmailed
Well, it’s only that he has to now bring in cake every day for Person X or they’ll tell everyone at radio 1 who he fancies. Quite amusing I think. Scott is too easy bullied. I wonder who it is though, and I wonder who was on his list. Oh well., we’ll just have to wait until he forgets the cake one day. OO! Maybe we can work out who it is by what type of cake Scott is bringing in! Lemon Drizzle = Edith Bowman. No I just made that up but yeh, you get the jist.
I Would Go Out With A Monkay
Yeh. A guy has realised that he would actually rather go out with a monkay after a Flirt Divert message. Which has provoked lots of monkey-dating ideas. Of which Scott then proceeded to act out a scenario of which he said “Hello Mum. Meet Steve.” and then made some monkey noises. Er, Steve? Ahem.
4. – (sorry I forgot the time) PM JUST A TEXT FROM HEAVEN!
The Dead Pet Special will be on next week! Woo! I should ask about my friend’s cat. Why did he always want to pee in the fireplace?
Put Your Hands Up For
(insert remote place in England/where you come from e.g. Broadstairs)
Or alternatively, BARNSLEY!
Scott’s Seen His Old Boss Doing It!
On a video tape. Ewewewewew. By accident I stress. He didn’t actually rake it out or anything.
Oh This Is So Childish, But So Amusing!
Oh dear. I am crying. Aleese Wanger. Haha. And also Randy Phanny. I have no idea if I spelt those right. Oh, and before I forget, Scott always encourages you to text in and give him an update on whether you think they are dumbing down at all.
“I Want Scott To Kill My Sisters”
Quite an unusal Random Act of Kindness. But Rachel has requested that Scott kill her sisters who hide the generic (that’s my new favourite word) television card so she can’t watch the tele and changed all of her internet passwords to ‘Hahaha’. They are incredibly amusing.
Your Pet Doesn’T Have To Be Dead!
That’s great! I can ask my cat why he’s so attracted to sleeping on my dad’s bed when my dad is allergic to cats.
6.34 PM SCOTT MOANS ABOUT LOST!
Because he is blatantly Lost.
That’s it for this week Geeks/Scott-Mills-Stalkers! Bye!
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