Goood mornin'! Scott's doing the breakfast show this week with Chappers, Laura, Emlyn, and Georgina. It's Monday… so let's get on with today's review.
Who's a clever boy now…
One Night with Laura continues
So last week Scott was travelling the country looking for a potential boyfriend was our lovely Laura. But who will it be? The finalists are in London – Gareth, Shep, James and Ben. Today four will become three. Chappers was feeling good now that he is no longer sleeping in a coffin. One of them will be winning a hot date with Laura in Paris – by the way how's it going there these days – have they stopped kicking the toys out of their prams? Contestants on Friday included Gary who was just a bit modest. It seemed it was all about One Night with Gary. Then there was Kris, the guy with his shirt tucked into his trousers who sung some rubbish song that he thought should be the national anthem – You Canny Shove Yer Granny Off a Bus. Then there was Shep from Beep Beep Busters last week (tumbleweed) but he'd traveled from Belfast all the way to Glasgow. Shep's magic trick was he could take his pants off without taking his trousers off. Naturally Laura picked Shep to be a finalist.
First of all Scott we met James and Ben again. Gareth hadn't apparently stopped drinking from the night before. According to James in his audition he said girls with boyfriends were a challenge to him, and he had a wandering eye. But he did make up for it by singing and playing the guitar. Ben's the accordion guy, who transformed 'It's All about You' (as everyone seems to) to write a song about Laura. Ben won't be able to win One Night With Laura in my eyes, as it'll make the movie of Laura very confusing – having Ben from Season 4 of the diary too. Straight after this interview terminated James was chatting up George off of Newsbeat.
Then it was Gareth and Shep. Gareth was the one who commented on Scott's ears at the auditions.
Gareth: They should vote for me so I can win. I get a free holiday out of this
Shep was on, he'd traveled from Italy to Belfast to Glasgow. We should pick Shep, because he doesn't want to be known as 'that loser from Radio 1' who didn't win the date.
At 9.10 the text polls opened for who you wanted to stay in the competition. The votes came in their thousands. The person going home today is James. It's how I thought the votes would go – they'd want the accordion man kept in (Ben), the drunken man (Gareth) and the sweet man (Shep). Tomorrow will be a difficult choice! James was said to be gutted.
New Jingle #1 – One Night with Laura
"One Night with Laura is almost up, and on the nation's lips,
She really is a gorgeous girl, with really lovely hips,
Who will be the winner? So many lovely chaps,
To win that night with Laura and her really lovely… personality,
The Chris Moyles Show with Scott Mills ‘cos Chris is on Holiday… International Radio 1…"
On Friday it was the Glasgow auditions, and Alison McKenzie was on the judging panel – whooo? She's off of River City, the Scottish soap. Alison turned out to be asking the auditionees lots of random questions including asking to see one contestant's bottom! She certainly got more than just a bottom.
Scott was also annoyed that Chappers didn't rescue Scott from the media on Friday. He was being grilled by Beverley off of the Daily Record who was demanding to know some secrets from Scott including the line-up to Radio 1's Big Weekend. Chappers noticed Scott was finding the interview difficult and decided to walk out and leave him to it. Also, his latest cringe – the word 'panties' – is something that appears to be shared by many of the listeners. Several listeners are sharing their disgust of the word 'panties'. He also discovered he dislikes the words 'discharge', 'mucus' and 'scalp'.
New Jingle #2 – Holiday
"Scott Mills is on the Chris Moyles Show this bright and cheery morn,
He loves to get up early, around the crack of dawn,
Why oh why oh why oh why, is Chris not here today?
You and I both know that he's f**ked off on holiday,
Also on the show
The Chris Moyles Show with Scott Mills ‘cos Chris is on Holiday… International Radio 1…"
You go for a meal and you end up stuck next to this guy – what dad wouldn't be proud?
On Saturday night Scott and his dad went for a meal (it's both their birthdays on the Tuesday). Scott offered to pay for Scott, his dad, his brother and his dad's wife. But as usual, things didn't go too well as he spent his birthday meal next to his dear colleague Comedy Dave. There were no other tables, so it was all a bit awkward.
Scott was also talking about his friend who met his girlfriend at a relative's funeral. Many callers had found they knew people in similar situations. One caller had met his future wife at his uncle's funeral. Is that a bit wrong? Discussion continues on our forum.
First Play
Scott had the first of the Red Hot Chilli Peppers' new track – Dani California. My personal opinion? It's great, and is the RHCPs on top form. IrishBaz off of the forum said 'it grows on you – I've listened to it 6 or 7 times and it sounds really well'. Scott also played the new Orson track.
New Jingle #3 – Washing
"Waxing your chest, combing your hair, even shaving your legs,
Cooking up a breakfast of sausage and fried eggs,
We wonder what you're doing, while we're singing this song,
Driving, working, brushing your teeth or maybe washing your schlong,
The Chris Moyles Show with Scott Mills ‘cos Chris is on Holiday… International Radio 1…"
Chappers – the coolest dad in radio
The team recently noticed Chappers' has been enjoying a lot of songs on the playlist including Infernal and Girls Aloud. So Laura went off to get a hidden microphone to record Chappers. This was a funny piece of radio from Chappers singing to himself those two songs in the office. Chappers failed to see the funny side asking for it to be turned off!
There was also a chance today to catch that phone game prank with radio's Mr Nasty – Vernon Kay – once more. You can hear that again in our archives.
New Jingle #4 – Sausage Sandwich
"It's 9.30am and we're here to make you smile,
Scott and the team will be here for a while,
Scott loves this time of day, to play his hit selection,
But Chappers still looks half asleep with his big… sausage sandwich,
The Chris Moyles Show with Scott Mills ‘cos Chris is on Holiday… International Radio 1…"
Jono's final thoughts
An excellent start to the Breakfast Show today – and the variation of old and new music has been outstanding. Despite an average breakfast stint in January, the jingles and banter has been hilarious and I'm looking forward to this fortnight. Presumably One Night with Laura will end on Friday, so perhaps it's time for Brucie to be brought back for a final week. Roll on 7am tomorrow.
Remember the best bits of today's show will be on our forum, and there's the podcasts from the BBC on Radio 1 online.
JK and Joel will be filling in for Scott Mills at 4pm.
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