With no Glastonbury, the archive returned to festival nonsense
Scott and Chris were off again, so the podcast returned to a 2015 Glastonbury prank.
The original idea came from the mythology around celebrity riders: strange backstage requests supposedly made by famous performers and their entourages.
Scott and Chris decided to ring businesses around Glastonbury pretending to organise supplies for major celebrities.
Chris would play the professional assistant.
Scott would become the celebrity whenever necessary.
The first call collapsed almost immediately
They began by trying to contact a local bakery.
Chris attempted to maintain a plausible tone while Scott jumped in with a deliberately ridiculous celebrity voice.
It was too much.
Chris could not stop laughing and the call ended before they managed to build anything convincing.
Rather than abandon the idea, they moved to a fish shop.
Kim Kardashian required fresh fingers of fish
This time Chris explained that he represented the wife of a high-profile performer.
Scott then appeared as “Kim Kardashian”.
His principal demand was fish fingers.
Not frozen supermarket fish fingers: something fresh, locally made and suitable for an important celebrity.
The quantity gradually became around 200.
The shop attempted to work out what was actually possible, including whether cod or haddock was available and how so many portions could be prepared and served.
Scott’s Kim kept adding confusion, asking about alternatives such as scampi and loudly introducing new requirements.
The shop was almost too helpful
What made the prank work was how seriously the business tried to solve the problem.
Rather than dismissing the absurd request, the person on the phone considered quantities, fish availability and practical serving arrangements.
Scott continued behaving as an impossibly demanding celebrity while Chris tried to hold the call together as the sensible assistant.
There was even the complication that Kim’s supposed husband did not like fish.
By the end Scott and Chris admitted it was one of the cheapest and most cringeworthy bits they had done: no elaborate setup, just a phone, a local business and Scott finally finding a public use for his terrible Kim Kardashian impression.
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