Chris had completed the Cardiff Half Marathon
Chris arrived at Radio 1 walking differently after running the Cardiff Half Marathon.
Scott was impressed that he had finished.
Chris was mainly thinking about one unscheduled break.
At around six miles, he realised he urgently needed the toilet.
This was not a case of stopping for a quick wee.
Chris joined a queue for the portable toilets and apologised to women waiting because his own situation could not be solved by simply going beside the course.
He later estimated that the stop had cost him a better finishing time.
Scott naturally turned the incident into a medical investigation.
Messages arrived from runners and doctors explaining that runner’s tummy was real.
The intestines could be affected by the physical movement and stress of long-distance running.
One doctor described the digestive system taking a “mechanical beating”, a phrase Scott and Chris replayed with far too much enthusiasm.
Chris felt significantly better knowing the emergency was not simply evidence that his body had failed in a uniquely embarrassing way.
Chris’s football prediction went very wrong
The weekend had also included one of Chris’s proudest broadcasting moments.
He had appeared on *Football Focus* predicting scores against Mark Lawrenson.
Chris decided to be bold and predicted Watford would beat Bournemouth 4–0.
The confidence looked considerably worse once the actual match happened.
Scott enjoyed the contrast between Chris appearing on national television as a football expert and then having to explain one of the most spectacularly wrong predictions possible.
Chris accepted that perhaps future appearances required a slightly more cautious approach.
Phantom flatmates were living among us
The programme then moved to people who technically lived together but barely saw one another.
Chris remembered a university flatmate who spent almost all his time in his bedroom.
The group could hear him moving around.
His food disappeared.
His pans changed position.
But actual sightings were rare.
Scott and Chris named the phenomenon phantom flatmates.
Listener Daniel described a first-year university housemate who looked a little like a young Rylan and would occasionally appear in the kitchen before disappearing back to his room.
The cupboards showed clear evidence that he existed.
The people living with him still knew almost nothing about his life.
The conversation struck a chord with listeners who realised they had shared rent, kitchens and bathrooms with people who remained almost complete strangers.
A dog decided Bangers
The programme also began experimenting with animal judges for Bangers.
Instead of asking a human listener to choose between Scott and Chris’s songs, a dog was involved.
The premise was intentionally unreliable.
The presenters interpreted the animal’s movement and attention as a musical decision.
Scott immediately wanted to continue the idea with other species throughout the week.
Bangers had existed for years.
Apparently the next great development was removing people from it.
Rude lyrics which were not rude
Listeners were also hearing words in current Radio 1 songs which sounded far more explicit than the actual lyrics.
Scott and Chris played the sections and tried to establish what singers were really saying.
Once somebody had suggested a rude alternative, it became almost impossible to hear the clean lyric again.
The feature was essentially the musical equivalent of Yanny and Laurel.
Except this time, listeners were accidentally making daytime pop much less broadcastable.
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