An old horse chose the music
Bangers continued its animal experiment.
The latest judge was Johnty, an elderly horse.
Scott and Chris admitted the entire process of asking animals to choose music was scientifically meaningless.
That did not stop them treating Johnty’s response with the seriousness normally reserved for an actual listener.
The animal week was becoming more ridiculous with each species.
Scott was beginning to suspect this was probably as far as Bangers could be stretched.
Chris was less sure.
Adam had a nightclub stamp tattooed on his hand
The main listener story involved Adam from Barnsley.
He had gone on holiday to Magaluf.
At some point, a friend persuaded him that a permanent tattoo would be a brilliant financial strategy.
Back home, Adam regularly visited a nightclub called Shabar.
Rather than continue paying entry, why not tattoo the club’s entry stamp onto his hand?
Adam woke up after the holiday with exactly that.
The tattoo had cost around 40 euros.
Entry to Shabar normally cost only a few pounds.
That meant Adam needed to visit a substantial number of times before the decision became financially worthwhile.
The club did apparently accept the tattoo and allow him in.
Scott conceded that, in the narrowest possible sense, the plan worked.
The drawbacks appeared immediately
The problem was that Adam now permanently looked like somebody who had been out the night before and had not washed the stamp off.
At work, people could reasonably wonder why the mark was still there.
On nights when Adam had not even gone out, his hand still claimed otherwise.
There was also the obvious long-term risk.
If Shabar changed its logo, ownership or entry system, the entire business case disappeared.
Adam was already considering having the tattoo covered.
Scott suggested it might be adapted into something involving Cheryl and Bear.
That would remove the Shabar problem.
It would create several new ones.
Funny Business kept escalating
The show returned to Funny Business, where Scott and Chris phoned genuine companies with names capable of making them laugh.
The previous Tony’s Tackle call had become a benchmark.
This edition included more businesses whose names sounded completely different when read without context.
The challenge remained conducting a polite, believable enquiry while the person on the other end simply did their job.
Scott thought this was one of the strongest rounds yet.
The important thing was that the businesses themselves were real.
Radio 1 did not need to invent innuendo.
British company registration had already done the work.
One listener’s partner became Donald Trump
The Monday “weekend blowout” stories also continued.
One caller described a partner who sometimes imitated Donald Trump in the bedroom.
Scott and Chris struggled to decide whether the impression made arguments funnier or dramatically worse.
The show had asked for petty relationship habits.
It had not expected presidential role-play to be among them.
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