Goood mornin' treacle! It's only bley Thursday and you're just two days away from the weekend. Let's get on with today's review.
Has this week's Scott Mills shows inspired you to be fabulous? Scott's fallen off the bandwagon already when it comes to drinking and Laura managed 3 days with out the cigarettes.
No doubt the wine will be on big time tomorrow!
And today's jingle brought the revelations that Scott almost had Spoony last night:
"Tired, shattered, exhausted, 'cos last night he had some wine,
We almost had Spoony, or at least that's what they say,
Don't be surprised 'cos it's gonna be a great day,
Brush your teeth and comb your hair and may be have a bacon sandwich
The Chris Moyles Show, National Radio 1…"
"Happy Thursday to you people, whatever you want to say,
But there's no Chris today, if he's new to you hello,
Scott is just like Chris, he's done lots and lots,
When they eat so much crap.. gooooood mornin'…
The Chris Moyles Show, National Radio 1…"
Chappers' cab was very good once again this morning, just like yesterday Scott and Laura made diva demands. He had a pillow again, had the door opened for him and he had a CD of Chess – the musical for him. Scott says tomorrow he'll have the ride of his life…
Scott was on 'Big Brother: The Celebrity Years' last night on Channel 4, he wasn't looking fat – it was all muscle. The show returns tonight, Scott will no doubt be watching, as will I.
"GET DOWN ON THE FLOOR!" – Derren Brown is a huge fan of the show…
There was also talk about The Heist from last night, the latest Derren Brown programme. Scott only caught the last 15 minutes so wasn't sure why 'Can You Feel It' by the Jackson 5 (not the V version – whoooooo?), rubbing their leg and the colour green could make someone rob a bank. Chappers believed it, and found it impressive. He was talking about the electricity experiment (as Stanley Milgram did in the 1960s to talk about his agency theory – boy I'm good at this psychology stuff!). One bloke did it gently, another went a bit quicker and one girl was very vicious with the 'shocks'. It was all very impressive as the participants all shouted 'GET DOWN ON THE FLOOR' at the top of their voice. Obviously a fan of the show.
And there was an appeal from Scott for information about the girl who had borrowed the car from earlier this week. Have you lost a car and have given the Flirt Divert number out? You need to get in touch with Scott. He might be able to get you that car back. Just don't try any funny business, it's not an excuse to try and blag yourself a car. On another note Mark Chapman is available for those who have had a mishap with giving out the Flirt Divert number, he can help you sue Scott on a 'no win, no fee' basis. The Flirt Divert number is 07774598750.
Those who are on the diet and trying to be 'fabulous' shouldn't give up just yet – the headaches, sprained ligaments and aching bones shouldn't give up just yet. Don't fall in to the trap that Scott fell in to and return to the wine. If you get on to the One Life website you can find out details about how to love yourself.
Chappers: "Really? I'd better get on now, we all love a bit of self-loving from time-to-time"
One girl called in to say that her ex-boyfriend had left a message asking for her permission to go out with someone she knows called Rebecca. It's a bit weird, but also understandable, but Scott wasn't sure about the situation. The texters believed that he was either playing games or trying to make her jealous. It doesn't seem like respect for his previous partner to me. Girls were sharing similar stories, but what can girls say – they can't really say no. One girl had a story with a happy ending where the relationship with her friend didn't work as he wasn't over the first relationship and they got back together. But what do you think, is it a selfish thing or is it a polite thing? Get on to the Unofficial Mills forum and tell us.
Laura – Tempting men across the nation
Laura was back out on the streets today with a Laura vs You've Been Busted style feature. Alison called in about her boyfriend Gareth. Alison is a vegetarian, and as a New Year's Resolution would give up meat. She didn't have faith in him, so bet him £50 that he couldn't manage giving up meat for two weeks. All was fine until the other day Alison's friends saw him in MacDonalds eating a quarter pounder with cheese. He denied he was eating ham, but was apparently eating a fillet of fish. This was a lie because he doesn’t supposedly like fish. She was keen to win this bet, so Scott got Laura on the case. Scott sent Laura to Gareth's flat, and he was listening to the Today programme on Radio 4 (his loss!)
Chappers: "Uh-huh… John Humphries spins some good tunes!"
Laura had a whole tray of bacon sandwiches and paid a visit to Gareth posing as a woman from 'You Can't Beat Our Meat' – the new sandwich shop from the town. She was looking for feedback on the sandwich, and he soon tucked into the sandwich. Soon as he had she passed the phone over to Gareth for an estatic Alison to tell him he owes her £50. One of the most talked about discussions of my day at college, but the vegeterians really couldn't find the funny side of it.
Someone ought to tell her to stick her pictures down, and write, straight
Laura's Diary
A chirpier Mary was back on the show today to read the extract, today from Monday 18th April 1996. She changed her hair today to see if blondes really do have a lot more fun, and she had come up with a plan to show Anthony isn't just good at the piano. She was after Shed 7 tickets (they're still available!) and she was trying to raise enough money to go. Two tickets for Anthony and two tickets for her. Surely she must have been up all night devising that plan!
In the second installment it was Friday 22nd April 1996. She believed today was the best day of her life, starting with the team losing 14-0 in hockey, and Anthony agreed to go gigging with her. She couldn't concentrate with the touching and breathing! She thinks he likes her and was so happy she could cry. There were 5 different codes – LMF, WMF, FHP, TMUTA, and IMSH. Laura's codes will be the new text language for 2006.
Tomorrow is our last day of the Unofficial Mills campaign to get Laura's Diary released – sign the petition now! More pictures of Laura aged 16 online. Sadly no pictures of Mary!
The giant oranges in the background were cramping Brucie's style
C'mon down… Scott Mills!
Brucie: "I'm feeling a bit under the weather to be honest"
Scott: "Ohh what's wrong?"
Brucie: "Emma.. Roids"
Scott: "What noise do you make when you sit down?"
Brucie: "Ohhh!"
Today's callers included Daniel from Wisbech, who's a postman, and Charlotte from East Sussex.
The first prize was a set of cow fridge stickers – with the moo-look fridge you'll feel like you live in the countryside. At just £12.99 Charlotte was the closest. The second prize was a double umbrella – don't let it dampen your conversation. The correct price was £19.99 so Charlotte got it. The third was a candy G-String made from 330 pieces of fruit candy, something Brucie would love.
Scott: "Have you brought one?"
Charlotte: "Yeah for my boyfriend"
Daniel: "They don't do them in extra large tell her!"
It was £4.95 so Charlotte took home all 3 prizes. Scott managed to cut off Daniel instead of Charlotte when speaking to her. A very entertaining Carpark Price is Right – but sadly it's the last one tomorrow.
Jono's Final Words
Random Acts of Kindness
Tomorrow Scott's hoping for a Random Act of Kindness, more Laura's Diary and Laura's going on her Shed 7 date. A very amusing show today, hopefully they can keep it up for the final day of the Breakfast Show stint. There's more discussion about today's show on the forum, see you there!
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