Yeeessss! Goooood Mornin' and welcome to my first review of the Breakfast Show this week.
Scott, Chappers, Laura and company have moved to 6.55am for the next two weeks to fill in for Chris Moyles and this morning they were at their finest. Vernon Kay will be filling in for Scott from 4pm.
Jon Stewart's back with the news and Chappers is, of course, doing the sport.
Morning Banter
He's here with a big smile on his face from the Live8 concert. Chappers watched a lot of Live8 last night, but his Sky+ broke down so he only saw up to REM. Scott said his Sky+ stopped at UB40, but I think we can live without UB40… There was more banter about Live8 including diva Madonna and Mariah Carey's microphone stand problem. If anything goes wrong during the show Scott has an emergency tape – that's right – Elton John and Pete Doherty. But that's only in real emergencies, and let's be honest, it'd still be a better listen compared to local radio. Scott claimed Snoop Dogg woke him up on the Radio 1 coverage when he came on shouting "mother lover". Also this weekend Charlotte doesn't mind that she isn't Number 1 (that's 2pac by the way).
Jingle #1
"Happy Monday to you people, it’s Scott Mills in for Chris,
He sends all his love and a great big hug and kiss,
The good thing when he's not here, we have to confess,
With Moylesy away, the breakfast bill is less,
The Chris Moyles Show with Scott Mills ‘cos Chris is on Holiday… National Radio 1…"
Celebrity Time Check
With a jingle sounding very much like One Word Travel, it's Celebrity Time Check where a celebrity tells the time. First up this morning was a very dazed Lisa Riley who was confused as to why Scott was calling as it was only ten past 7. Chappers found the whole idea of waking Lisa Riley up amusing, not a nice thought though.
Scott: "Nothing but the biggest names on this show".
And we had a second time check, this time with Ricardo from The Salon at 8.10.
Chris is back… on tape…
Scott was handed a tape by Chris at Live8 and left an "audio envelope", giving the Mills team some rules. These included feeling free to abuse Aled and calling him "fat arse", impersonating Rachel and calling Dom a “slaphead”. Oh yes and a reminder for photographs for a new feature called "look at my girlfriend in her knickers" (G’Mornin'). Final instruction was to leave the mail on Dave's desk. I'm sure it's much clearer now…
Flirt Divert
The mailbox was very much full this weekend. Remember to add 0774598750 to your phone book. So what's been happening this weekend, one caller was so excited about her new date that she wants her to go round and meet the parents. She just wouldn't get to the point. Too much too soon methinks. And one guy had left his "TESCO bag" in the back of someone's car with some sausages in there. Do you have the man's sausages? They're about to go out of date. By the way, it's TESCOs and not testicles… What would this guy be doing with sausages anyway? Infact don't answer. We then had a lovely story about a girl who had a mate who took meat in to a club. Note the sarcasm there!
Jingle #2
"Hello to the UK from your DJ Scott Mills,
Moylesy is off again so in jumps Scott to fill,
Mr all inclusive, Chris has gone away,
You know he really loves the all-you-can-eat buffet.
The Chris Moyles Show with Scott Mills ‘cos Chris is on Holiday… National Radio 1…"
Your Home is at Risk
The only radio quiz to feature a bailiff and children. The first contestant was Rosa, a seven year old, at home who doesn't know about the quiz. For every prize she can win today, she has to gamble something that belongs to her parents. She had no problem with that! We even had a chorus of Hollaback Girl from Gwen Stefani. After much hesitation:
Rosa: “Oooh brings my shi…”
Don't worry she said ship. For an album she gambled her mum's shoes which were worth £80. I'm sure Chappers would love them. She correctly answered tennis is played at Wimbledon. For a Barbie Scooter she gambled her step-dad's computer. She was willing to make him cry, but she answered correctly that blue and yellow makes green. Even Scott wasn't sure on that one! And for the big prize – a trampoline. This time she gambled her mother's car! A nice silver and gold MG. What a gambler! What a sweet child. Some people are so cynical though, saying it's a fix. One texter tried to claim Russia wasn't in the G8, sorry mate, but it is. Kids get in touch on 08700 100 100 for a chance to play.
Becky from Bristol
Rate My Listener
As predicted, Rate My Listener is back today. Today it's Becky from Bristol, and you can rate her and her Bristols… She likes relaxing with her sister, she's off to Africa soon (said that quite a bit) and doesn't she have lovely curtains. So her vital statistics?
Scott: "38…."
32E, apparently, and her ideal man would be Jude Law. At the moment she's been rated buff. Don't forget to send in your photographs!
Jingle #3 Ah yes, a classic jingle. (Well I mean they played it last time)
"Good morning from Scott and his production team,
We're all well slept an washed and smelling nice and clean,
It's just gone 8 o'clock so please get out of bed,
It's early so I know this song will get stuck in your head.
The Chris Moyles Show, National Radio 1…"
Curry in a Hurry
The Takeaway Game
It's the Takeaway Game! Back once again, this time its victims are the brilliantly named 'Curry in a Hurry'. Have a read of the previous reviews if you want to know about the idea of the Takeaway Game, it bores the hell out of me having to explain it! But it's a brilliant feature; some of the older Takeaway Games are on our show clip pages. One of my favourites parts is where one of them was ranting and raving and the other is on the other end saying "Er.. Hello? Hello?"
Make Chappers Cry!
Martin the banner guy managed to get the "I survived the brown noise" banner on to Big Brother on Friday night. Nice one. And as for the programme itself, they were crying themselves to sleep last night. This is the latest task that they were set. They all had to go in to the Diary Room and cry. Big Brother were trying to help them, playing some great songs to demotivate them… Playing various songs, and recalling various soap star moments including various deaths – including Rolly, a dog from Eastenders. I have to say at one moment when they were playing the Big Brother clips I actually got emotional. It must have been too early in the morning! The Manchester United trip with his dad didn't get him crying, nor did the soppy music. One way which could have got him crying was a kick in the downstairs department.
Jingle #4
"Scott and Chappers get up early when Chris is away,
They love early mornings, or at least that's what they say,
Actually, to be fair, it's all going to be fine,
'Cos it's not long until the both of them can have a glass of wine,
The Chris Moyles Show with Scott Mills ‘cos Chris is on Holiday… National Radio 1…"
Mariah Carey
Against all odds, she's on the show tomorrow, and listeners get the chance to send in some for Scott to ask her. Apart from most were a bit dodgy, you couldn't really say them to her face. Speaking of Divas, Scott was getting rather stressed with the computer. But it's not all glamour, Scott had to go and find Chappers who was in the toilet just before Flirt Divert.
Record of the Week
"My Doorbell" by The White Stripes is this Scott's Record of The Week. And it's a fine choon I must say.
Jingle #5 – my favourite so far… Ooh how sad of me.
"Scott's the right man for this show, we hope that you will agree,
We almost had Spoony, but he's got a massive fee,
Scott is just like Chris, except a bit more thin…
Goooood Mornin'…
The Chris Moyles Show, National Radio 1…"
Tomorrow Laura's out on the streets, there's more of today's features and expect an interesting Mariah Carey interview. Don't forget Vernon's on from 4pm. I'll probably give you a brief round-up of his show at some point, so keep visiting!
And don't forget to tell me what you thought of today's show on our message board where you can hear some great clips from today.
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