Scott’s hands had become suspiciously soft
Working differently had changed tiny parts of the presenters’ lives.
Scott was using enough hand cream and sanitiser to become unusually interested in the condition of his hands.
Chris immediately connected this with Scott’s failed 2019 attempt to become a professional hand model.
Scott insisted the hands were improving.
The professional verdict from the previous year still existed.
No amount of moisturiser could completely erase “volume of fingers.”
Beyoncé’s challenge kept rising
After Jayde Adams conquered Mariah Carey, the show moved on to “Love On Top.”
Beyoncé’s final section rises again and again through key changes.
Listeners kept volunteering.
One caller had performed on *Michael McIntyre’s Big Show* and sounded more qualified than most.
Another arrived with the confidence of somebody who believed the whole climb would be straightforward.
Scott wanted one person to make it all the way through without bailing.
The challenge worked because almost everybody knew the exact moment their voice could go no further.
The Who Game found Mike again
The Who Game also returned.
Regular caller Mike joined alongside listeners offering increasingly random references.
Watering cans.
Swine flu.
Throwing underwear at celebrities.
Things which had once been common enough to recognise immediately and now sounded like another era.
Scott and Chris liked the feature most when the suggestion produced instant argument.
Was it genuinely gone?
Or had the caller simply stopped noticing it?
Tap End returned to the school disco
Chris’s autobiographical archive went back to year eight.
School discos had changed as he got older.
Earlier versions were mostly sweets, football shirts and boys ignoring girls.
Now relationships had entered the room.
Chris remembered a girl he liked being there.
Her friend approached with an admirably direct question.
Did he fancy her?
Was he going to slow dance with her?
Chris missed the simplicity of teenage intermediaries doing the difficult part for you.
K-Ci & JoJo created the moment
Then “All My Life” played.
Chris’s friends physically pushed him towards the girl.
They stood face to face.
She put her hands on his shoulders.
Chris put his hands on hers.
They swayed from side to side like two nervous zombies.
Eventually Chris realised his hands were supposed to move towards her waist.
Then S Club 7’s “Never Had a Dream Come True” continued the slow-dance atmosphere.
Scott replayed the music while Chris reconstructed every uncomfortable movement.
Lockdown meant nobody was attending a school disco.
Tap End could still recreate one in painful detail.
The Beast entered the mix
The day’s celebrity DJ was Mark Labbett, The Beast from *The Chase*.
Mark admitted lockdown was frustrating but had given him time to catch up on revision and box sets.
There was one activity nobody wanted him for.
Online quizzes.
People constantly asked whether he could join.
Scott pointed out that inviting The Beast to your family quiz rather ruined the competition.
Monster songs were inevitable
Mark’s mix leaned into his nickname.
Monster and beast-themed records appeared naturally.
Scott and Chris kept offering more increasingly literal suggestions.
Mark approached the set with the same confidence he brought to a quiz podium.
By the end, Radio 1 had transformed one of television’s most intimidating quiz brains into a lockdown DJ playing monster anthems from home.
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