Shopping channels choose the Christmas presents
The programme revived its annual game in which Scott, Chris and Beccy called television shopping channels without seeing the screen and bought whatever was being advertised at that moment. Scott went first and discovered that Chris’s present would be a £9.99 sausage-shaped stretch-and-tug dog toy. The sales adviser enthusiastically explained that dogs could chew it and play tug of war, then became confused when Scott revealed that the recipient was his friend rather than a pet.
Chris called another channel to buy for Beccy and found a product called Shower Feet. Its suction base attached to the floor of a shower, while more than a thousand bristles cleaned and massaged a person’s feet. One cost £9.99 or a pair cost £14.99. Chris chose two because Beccy had two feet, then suggested the second might allow somebody to join her in the shower. She accepted the present largely because it was much cheaper than the £2,000 earrings he had supposedly selected the previous year.
Beccy’s attempt to buy for Scott produced the expensive result everybody had feared. The screen was showing a 42-inch television reduced from £1,100 to £999.96. She asked whether anything cheaper was visible in the background, but the rules required the item actually being demonstrated. Scott insisted that she complete the purchase and looked forward to receiving the largest and most valuable present in the game’s history.
The mystery musical is Spamalot
Chris arrived at the Playhouse Theatre expecting to join Les Misérables and called Scott in confusion when he saw that the production was Spamalot. He had learnt songs from the wrong musical and had only around 90 minutes to prepare. Scott reminded him that he had promised a part in a West End show but had never identified it as Les Misérables. Chris realised that the references to dreams, one day more and Samantha Barks had allowed him to reach that conclusion himself.
His Spamalot script contained a single word: “sorry”. The wardrobe team dressed him in armour, a microphone was attached and he waited in the wings for an entrance about 20 minutes into the first act. After rehearsing extensively, Chris walked on, delivered the word in an operatic style and left. Two friends cheered loudly from the audience, but the line was heard and the performance went exactly as planned.
The appearance finally broke his run of stage disasters. He had been sick in Edinburgh and disconnected his microphone at KOKO, but succeeded at the third attempt. Although it was not Jean Valjean, Chris enjoyed the experience and properly laughed while watching the second half of Spamalot. He declared that he had caught the acting bug and invited theatre, television and film producers to offer him further roles, particularly any which could accommodate the word “sorry”.
Dear Scott uncovers a familiar Skyfall song
A listener wrote to say that Chris’s proposed Bond theme for Skyfall sounded remarkably similar to Billy Joel’s “We Didn’t Start the Fire”. The team replayed Chris’s rapid list of words ending in “fall”, including basketball, city hall and Senegal, before comparing it with Joel’s record. Scott and Beccy immediately heard the resemblance, while Chris insisted that his version was different and more relevant to the film.
His defence weakened when both tracks used the same breathless list structure and rhythm. The most obvious distinction was Chris’s spoken ending featuring Pussy Galore. Beccy concluded that the Bond theme had been a blatant rip-off, but Chris refused to accept that he had borrowed anything deliberately.
Real or No Real
Cupping an ear did not improve hearing efficiency by 15%, but pieces of bread really had been used to erase pencil marks before rubber erasers. Inca brides had also been required to peel a potato to demonstrate that they would make good wives, starting a discussion about whether Chris could safely wire a plug. His belief that the brown wire was earth suggested that he should not try.
Searching Google Images for 241543903 really did produce numerous photographs of people placing their heads inside refrigerators. Scott and Beccy were fascinated that such unrelated images had become associated with one number. Lincolnshire men did not traditionally give women a sausage on Christmas morning, despite the county’s strong sausage credentials. Beccy finished with 30 points and Scott with ten before the team confirmed they would return live on Christmas Eve.
COMMENTS