‘Right Treac.
The nation has loved Scott for his drunken antics, the kid who’s most likely to be picked last for the football team, and quite frankly, his severe lack of concern for health. On a completely different level, he went for a 4 mile run this morning, whats going on?!
Poo, Fat Sex and Hotel Rooms… Only with Scott Mills
Remember Carla from last week with her poo story in the hotel room? She’s back, with another story. Only this time, the guests didn’t leave behind poo for her to clean up, they left some sordid photographs of their hot night of love. As if that wasn’t bad enough, they were old, perhaps overweight and French. Old, fat sex…. Its what everyone wants to see in their normal 9 to 5 job. Who’dve thought the old codgers still had it in them! It may be fair to say that the photos were passed around some of the staff, maybe even up on the notice board in the smoking room…
After some thought, Scott asked, if both wife and husband were in these photos, then who took them? Is that part of the room service?! Tut, saucy couple.
Even more dirty photographs
Following on from what seems to be the theme of the show as amateur porn, Scott has another caller. He works in a certain photo developing shop and said he often sees photos similar of that in the fat French sex ones. When people found such randy photographs from customers, duplicates would be run off and they’d be put up in a kind of wall of shame type notice board. He says when the people in the photograph start reaching the older generation, that’s when it gets nasty,
At about 5.15pm, Scott gets some of his older listeners who are in their 60’s texting in claiming they often take pictures of themselves and their other half in the more intimate evenings. Pictures aside, who thought they could actually text?! Bless them, only took them 45 minutes after the first story of old sex.
French Prank Call… Some Would Say Scottish
Scott calls the hotel, posing as a French guy, planning on asking for his saucy photos back. Now we all know normally his impressions are just super, his French however, isn’t exactly up to scratch. And somehow manages to dip into some Scottish throughout the call. The receptionist gets him put through to housekeeping, where he proceeds to ask for his photographs. When she asks him what room number he was staying in, he replies with “Neuf. Huit. Deux”. That’s one big hotel! Surprisingly, there is no room 982, so she thinks he obviously cant understand French. Trust Scott to get the woman who is fluent in French! It really doesn’t go to plan. Scott ignores this, and proceeds to describe the photos with a “very big and beautiful woman in them, with big boobies”. He decribed them further, but the bleeping machine was put in place. Rather unsuccessfully in fact… listen real hard, and you might just be able to guess what he said.
Where’s Kylie?
After hearing a clip on last nights newsbeat of Kylie, with a ridiculously stereotypical sound of an accordion whilst she was in France. So this prompted a new feature for Scott… “Where’s Kylie?”. First off, Scott played a didgeridoo behind her… which to the normal world, is obviously Australia. These callers were a little thick though, they had no idea what was going on…. “eerrr, Glasgow?”. He was a little early, turns out the next clip was bagpipes. Hmm, wonder where that could be?! Thankfully though, someone got that right. Id be worried about Scott’s audience IQ if they didn’t.
Listen tomorrow for more of “Where’s Kylie?”. Bet you cant wait eh.
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