Ite treac’? This week has whipped by, and another Monday show passes us by.
X Factor Guilt Continuity
Now that this problem has been given a proper term, many listeners since last Monday’s show have been suffering. Okay, on Saturday, it was fine to laugh at the “Zippedy do-dah” guy. It was fine to have a giggle at the freaks. We chuckle at these people without a trace of guilt. The exception is Thomas. It is not fine to laugh at Thomas. Thomas even has his own album, entitled: “It’s Thomas”, in which people few and far between have heard, but other than that, it’s being kept under wraps for none other that Simon Cowell to produce. Chappers and Laura (yes, you two) laughed at the clip, thus proving that they have no X Factor guilt.
Chopper and Laura, prepare to “answer to God.”
Record of the Week
This weeks Record of the Week comes courtesy of Freemasons (off’ve remixing dull Beyoncé tracks, i.e: “Beautiful Liar”) and is called “Uninvited.”
Lots of mixed reactions on this one, as one listener stated: “It sounds like a Steps album track.”
Leona Lewis
The word on your lips is probably “Who?”. Well, 2006’s X Factor is back with a new single, called “Bleeding Love” (insert your own jokes here). Sounds like Leona has gone emo with a song title like that, as Scott said she’d been “kept in a box with Louis Walsh sat on top, and has been let out of the box to release a new single.
Flirt Divert
Those listeners never let us down, do they?
Check out this lot of freaks they’ve been meeting over the weekend:
One from someone who has never used an answerphone before:-
“Hello, hello? Hello? Are you there? Hello? Hello? Hello?” (Caller starts to
whistle)
“Hi sexy, remember this?” (Goes on to make a strange sound with their tongue). I dread to think, I really do.
“I got 16 of us that wanna do it. I understand your insurance won’t cover it! We’ll just be in flipflops and a mask!” Little did we know that they we discussing paintballing…
Ghost Hunting
As Scott told us on Friday, he was going ghost hunting with the Most Haunted team and 3 members of the Chris Moyles show. Naming them all after characters from Scooby Doo, Scott’s line-up looked like this:
The Wonder Years
Scott Mills – Fred
Rachel Jones – Velma
Aled Jones – Scrappy Doo
Comedy Dave Vitty – Shaggy
Scott believes he was the bravest of the bunch, and Yvette even said that he was braver than previous guests McFly and the Dingles off of Emmerdale fame.
The first location was a haunted house in Barking, Essex, which a Lurch off’ve the Adams Family type owner, who sounded a lot like Russell Brand with a penchant for saying: “Good luck to ya”, in Russell’s Dickensian urchin style voice. Yvette wanted to conduct a seánce here, but the Russell-esque keeper replied:
“A seánce? In here? This evening?” He then ran out in tears, saying he didn’t want anything more to do with it.
A listener later called in to say that he has seen faces in the window at this location on his way back from the pub. But was it just pure drunkeness? Whatever it was, “good luck to ya!”
The second place was Chatham, Kent. Here, Scott was locked in a basement by himself with lots of bats. Now, any ordinary person would have been terrified, wouldn’t they not? Not Scott. Scott said he was rather bored with it all.
Later on, a spirit threw a marble after Yvette asked the ghoul to, and Scott began to feel extremely sick, so sick that he had to leave the room. Aled got hit by something, but this wasn’t a marble, it was something that hit him by falling from the roof.
Sandwich Shop
When Scott went for a sandwich for lunch today, he didn’t bargain on the maker of it being the slowest ever. Scott ordered a ham salad sandwich on brown bread, simple, right? Obviously not. She took 20 minutes to complete it, asking if he wanted various fillings in it, such as potatoes. She then tried to squash the sandwich into a bag which was to small to fit the sandwich. So, next time, Scott is going to order something fairly confusing, ie: a focaccia.
Counting to 100,00,00
The guy in America who aimed to count to one million has finally completed his dream!!!!!1one. He began on the 18th of June, and finished today, taking a total of 89 days to count to one million. To celebrate, he got out the wine. He didn’t really, he played a ringtone rendition of “The Birdie Song”. Whatever floats your boat.
That’s all for this Monday; don’t forget you can download the podcast and the best clips!
Emma xxx
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