Chris survives the toilet incident
Chris returned after Friday’s alarming tweet about running out of toilet roll. His absence from the programme had been planned because he was filming Virtually Famous, but the timing made listeners assume he remained trapped.
He refused to explain precisely how the problem was resolved. Scott already knew because Chris’s girlfriend had texted him, opening a separate argument about why Scott and she had begun communicating socially. Seeing Danny Howard’s name repeatedly appear on her phone made Chris uneasy, although Scott insisted there was nothing to worry about.
Famous mothers
Mother’s Day photographs offered an opportunity to inspect the families of pop stars. Scott had wanted to post a picture with his mother Sandra, but she did not want to be photographed after a restaurant meal.
Instead, he examined the mothers of Foxes, Frankie Bridge and other performers. The pictures appeared to offer a preview of how celebrities might look in later life, while Chris began looking forward to Father’s Day and the prospect of investigating Zac Efron’s dad.
“Mate” means no romance
A listener had noticed more men calling her “mate”, from taxi drivers to colleagues. Scott proposed that a man used the word to demonstrate that he definitely did not fancy a woman.
Fearne Cotton regularly called Chris “mate”, which Scott treated as decisive evidence. The label could even make kisses at the end of a text safe because the friendship had already been declared.
Listeners quickly found exceptions. One woman’s boyfriend of four years called her mate and pal, creating a problem the theory could not explain. Others suggested the word might be a double bluff hiding a crush. Scott nevertheless maintained that repeated use usually placed somebody firmly in the friend zone.
What day is Rihanna singing about?
Listener Rob was troubled by Rihanna’s timing in “FourFiveSeconds”. She was three days from Friday and trying to make it home by Monday, but he could not establish when the story was happening.
Monday allowed Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday to sit between the singer and Friday. Tuesday worked only if the current day was counted, while Wednesday could also be forced to fit by including part of Friday itself.
Scott and Chris tried several calendars, added Drake and Craig David to the imagined night out and became less certain with every explanation. Rob promised to return on Wednesday, when they might finally be the correct number of days from Friday.
Real or No Real creates an experiment
Greg James’s facts included Emeli Sande receiving a micro pig backstage and Sam Smith layering his own voice approximately 20 times on “Lay Me Down”.
The final fact claimed that people unconsciously sniffed their fingers after shaking hands. Scott and Chris found it implausible and offensive, but the research was genuine. The discovery was left waiting for a practical Radio 1 test.
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