Lee Ryan responds to Celebrity Big Brother
Lee Ryan arrived as the week’s pantomime villain after the Casey Batchelor and Jasmine Waltz storyline in Celebrity Big Brother. He said the reaction felt wildly disproportionate, with some social-media users sending threats of stabbing or attacking him with an axe. Scott reminded listeners that it had been an entertaining television programme, not a justification for threatening anybody.
Lee had spoken to Jasmine and said they were fine. He continued to value Casey as a friend and praised her acting ambitions, but accepted that his behaviour looked as though he had led her on. Inside the house he had tried to explain that he did not feel the same romantic connection, while still seeking comfort and friendship from her.
He described the environment as emotionally disorienting. Producers repeatedly changed the housemates’ mood, cameras recorded every conversation and, after three weeks, he lost a normal sense of perspective. He knew he looked foolish even before leaving but could not work out how to resolve it. Lee wanted Ollie Locke to win and remained sympathetic to Sam Faiers, whose illness had made the experience particularly difficult.
Lee Ryan plays Innuendo Bingo
Scott installed an organ version of “Sorry Seems to Be the Hardest Word” as a “melt alarm” for any especially emotional explanation, then placed Lee opposite Chris for Innuendo Bingo. Radio 4’s Front Row began with Vincent van Gogh painting flowers to encourage Gauguin to come, and Michael Portillo’s guide recommended the Cock.
Richard Osman recalled a goal which lobbed Seaman from the halfway line, while a cricket update celebrated Fulham’s stunning 69. A cook announced that she was going to take a leek, an Oxfordshire storm left a resident with his back door smashed in and Big Brother showed Wolfy grunting in her mackerel.
Nigella Lawson had two people in the bottom during The Taste. The final clip concerned a female climber discovering that going down on a donkey was unsafe. Lee embraced the game, soaking Chris and leaving himself wet enough to need an awkward walk through the building in search of dry clothes. Scott concluded that the supposed villain was a nice, slightly chaotic man who had provided excellent television.
The secret world of photo developing
Former photo-shop staff continued describing what happened when every print had to be checked manually. Some workplaces maintained a back-room wall or envelope of unusual images. One regular customer repeatedly submitted photographs of toy trolls arranged on a bed, while another older couple returned with intimate costumes and poses which made collecting the prints uncomfortable for both customer and employee.
A caller using the name Fluff described a wedding where disposable cameras were left on tables. His friends used one to take revealing photographs of themselves, then forgot that the bride’s mother was paying for development. She identified every participant by comparing the shoes visible in the offending images with ordinary wedding photographs. The lunch at which the discovery was explained became considerably more awkward than the prank itself.
A pub follows Scott
Scott’s nearest pub followed him on Twitter and sent a direct invitation to its reopening. He compared it with receiving a Christmas card from a takeaway: pleasant, but also evidence that the business knew him too well. He and Chris were still keen to attend.
Watching Benefits Street also revealed what Scott considered a strong impression of White Dee. He held back his voice and repeated “I’m over the moon”, receiving enough approval that White Dee herself retweeted him. The impression later blended with the exaggerated deep voice Charlie Sloth used during the afternoon.
Charlie Sloth plays Real or No Real
Charlie joined the game after discussing the proposed Celebrity Spit Roast Live, which he was still willing to consider hosting. Fat Joe really had agreed to a Radio 1 documentary interview only while he used the toilet, although Charlie had thankfully spoken to him by telephone rather than being in the room.
Medieval farmers did not call a goat able to lick its own udders a “selfie”, and Robin Thicke’s background DVD collection was invented. The remix of The Game’s “One Blood” genuinely featured an enormous line-up including Snoop Dogg, Nas, Lil Wayne, Rick Ross, Twista, E-40, Chamillionaire, Ja Rule and many others.
Charlie was distracted by the names, his diet and Scott’s claim to be bulking up, but confirmed that several of the rappers remained active and due on 1Xtra. Scott won 40–20, while Lee’s soaking became available online for the audience which had demanded revenge only a day earlier.
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