Scott’s accidental night at the opera
Scott opened Friday with a confession: he’d had “an accidental night out” — at the opera. He’d forgotten that his friend Mel Giedroyc had invited him to a show months earlier, after a chat when she was promoting it on The One Show. “She said to me, ‘Scotty, I’ve got a silly part in this new show. There’s loads of like carry on humour. Gang, Scotty, you’ll love it. It’s set on a boat, gang. Scotty, you’re going to love it. It’s great. You must come. Come along. It’s a bit like Panto.'” Scott said yes immediately — and at no point during the conversation, he noted, did Mel mention it was opera.
He arrived at the London Coliseum to find people “in velvet” and admitted: “I’ve never felt more self-conscious.” He was, he said, completely out of his depth. “Not a clue what was happening.” He praised the production — and Mel, who at one point “got winched onto a pulley and then flew through the air” — but was clear this was not his natural habitat. Tina pointed out she had been to the opera “with a couple of news presenters,” which Scott cheerfully compared to attending “with the president of Norway.” Ellie claimed her own opera credentials, though admitted she’d once strained her back craning to see from seats so high up she “wasn’t paying for the glasses on the stick.”
Listeners quickly wrote in to point out that what Scott had actually attended — in English, with words on a screen — was likely a Gilbert and Sullivan operetta rather than a full opera. Scott was briefly indignant. “I’m sorry, that was not English,” he said, before looking it up and conceding: “I’ve just looked it up, it was in English. It’s like karaoke with the words.” A tour guide from the Royal Opera House named Freya sent a voice note inviting Scott on a proper tour: “I’ll introduce you to the magical world of opera. And before long, you’ll be sitting in a box wearing an opera coat with a lanyard.”
Big Guest Friday: Rick Astley turns 60
Scott marked the occasion by dressing as 1987 Rick — black roll neck, light blue jeans, an almost-oversized blazer — and the show opened with a custom birthday jingle. Rick, visibly touched, admitted: “I’m embarrassed now. That’s kind of like, that’s got me sweating.”
Rick explained the outfit he wore for Never Gonna Give You Up was never really styled at all. The turtleneck was already in his bag. The double denim, the white raincoat — just what he’d grabbed. The sunglasses belonged to a cameraman called Ricardo who’d said “Here, son, put those on” on a sunny morning. “So it’s just honestly, it was just ridiculous, but it looks like you put it together.”
The first birthday surprise was a voice note from Gary Davis. Rick lit up. He and Gary had, he revealed, been skiing together in Val d’Isere on multiple occasions: “This is a dude who obviously you know I had massive respect for and loved and everything, but this is like we’re just hanging out in the slopes. I’m thinking I’ve made it, I’ve finally made it, I’m skiing with Gary Davis in Val d’Isere.”
Rick also revealed that before Never Gonna Give You Up, he had been the tea boy at the Stock Aitken Waterman studio — present in the building when Dead or Alive recorded You Spin Me Round, fetching sandwiches and learning the ropes. “None of them can play table tennis for toffee,” he added. “They’re all rubbish.”
Gifts followed: a beautiful old-fashioned tea maker (“so I can make proper tea now”), and from Mackenzie Crook, a tape measure, on the basis that Rick had once mentioned a fondness for DIY. “My life is complete,” Rick said.
He also played his brand new single, Waiting On You, which listeners immediately compared to a Bond theme. He discussed the documentary airing that night — Real Stories with Dermot O’Leary, followed by Rick Astley at the BBC — and admitted watching his younger self had been unexpectedly emotional. “It’s very, it’s tough when you sit there and watch yourself from being a 19, 21 year old kid and going through a lot of your life, you know. Seeing it up on a big screen as well.” A Jägermeister before filming, he said, had not been quite enough.
A second birthday message arrived via Scott’s boss, from Paddy McGuinness. Rick’s verdict on the impression: “A terrible impression by the way, but thank you man, love you, love you, Paddy.”
Never Gonna Give You Up played, as it always does on his birthday.
Riz Ahmed: Hamlet in modern London
Riz joined the birthday party in studio and, hearing Rick’s new single from the corridor, called it “very epic” with “that kind of orchestral swell to it. Kind of timeless.” He and Rick quickly bonded over Sound of Metal, in which Riz plays a drummer losing his hearing. Rick said he was “fully fully believing” watching the drumming. Riz said he’d genuinely learned for real but couldn’t pick up a drumstick now.
The main topic was his new film: a modern-day Hamlet, set in gritty contemporary London, in cinemas that day. Riz described director Anil Kari’s approach: “He’s got a background in directing rap music videos. So he brings that kind of rawness and edge to it.” The pitch was to strip back what people find “stuffy and traditional” and reveal what’s underneath: “an action thriller. You know, this is a revenge thriller. It’s got murder. It’s got heartbreak. It’s about a man on a mission.”
He drew a comparison to the Baz Luhrmann Romeo and Juliet and said what had been most gratifying was hearing from people who don’t normally engage with Shakespeare: “Young people, people who’ve historically not been into it, watching this and going: that was a ride.”
The cast includes Art Malik, Sheba Chadha, Morfydd Clarke, Joe Alwyn and Timothy Spall — who he was particularly keen to flag: “Polonius can, in the past, be a bit of comic relief, bit of a bumbling idiot. Tim Spall’s not a bumbling idiot — he’s got some danger in his eyes, the way he plays it.”
He also teased his upcoming TV show, Bait, out in March: “I play an out-of-work actor who somehow gets through to the last round of auditions to be the next James Bond. And when word gets out that I might be playing the next James Bond, people have a lot of very strong opinions about it.”
Mackenzie Crook: Small Profits and stop-motion spirits
Mackenzie joined the party ahead of his new BBC Two series Small Profits, launching Monday. He described the premise with characteristic understatement: “It’s about a lonely man in a suburban cul-de-sac who comes across a recipe to grow supernatural prophesying spirits in jars of water which can predict the future and answer any question truthfully. It’s that old cliche, I’m afraid.”
He plays the lead character’s boss at a DIY superstore — a pedantic, directionless jobsworth: “All he can think to do is ask people if they’ve been on their breaks yet.” He confirmed the character was based on a real former boss of his.
On the stop-motion animation used for the spirits, he explained his reasoning: “We see so much CGI these days that I don’t think people even notice it anymore, no matter how spectacular it is.” He designed the creatures himself, and friend Ainsley Henderson animated them at a rate of eight seconds a day.
A listener, Cliff from Solihull, texted to say he’d first seen Mackenzie twenty-five years ago as a warm-up act called Charlie Cheese at a comedy club in Windsor. Mackenzie’s response: “Just hearing the words ‘Charlie Cheese’ saw me just curl up and cringe a little bit.”
On Detectorists — asked by Stu in Norwich whether there’d be more — he was gently definitive. “I don’t think there will be. I think I’ve got to leave that there for fear of spoiling it. I mean, they ended up finding the Holy Grail. Where do you go from there?”
Lila Fear, the Olympics and Macy Gray
Sports desk reporter Matty Nixon flagged that Scott’s friend Lila Fear would be one of Team GB’s flag bearers at the Winter Olympics opening ceremony that evening in Milan. Her quote from the clip: “For our rhythm dance, we’re going to be skating to a Spice Girls medley, which is insane and so 90s, so pop, so very us. And also, Mel B commented on social media that she’s going to be watching, so. She better.”
Scott also made good on a promise from the previous day, playing Macy Gray’s Piano Room cover of I’m Too Sexy with the BBC Concert Orchestra. His verdict: “It’s a 10 out of 10 for me. I loved that.” He also flagged that Jarvis Cocker, fresh from Pulp’s Piano Room appearance on Monday, had recorded a CBeebies bedtime story — Wally, the World’s Greatest Piano-Playing Wombat — airing that evening.
The quiz, the Wonder Years, and the handover
Beth from Rugby — part-time year one teacher, part-time shop window painter — took on the Easiest Quiz. She acquitted herself well until hesitating on “name a sandwich filling,” having convinced herself the show had moved on to general conversation. Twelve points. “The game’s gone,” Scott said, warmly. She signed off: “Love you, bye.” “Love you, bye,” Scott replied.
The Wonder Years ran from 1987 through the 90s. Vernon Kay arrived for the handover with his hair feathered back to approximately 1998 — “honestly the best you’ve looked in ages,” Scott said. Vernon was heading to Austria for something Eurovision-adjacent, details to follow. Scott was heading for a Super Bowl watch party with former London Warriors teammates, and already mentally elsewhere by the time Darius Rucker’s Monday Piano Room came up in conversation.
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