Leather comes from cows
Scott’s friend Matt had only just discovered that leather came from cows and asked him not to mention it on Radio 1. Scott had made no such promise and used the confession to find other facts listeners had learned embarrassingly late.
One person had believed dual carriageways were “George carriageways”, perhaps named after their inventor. Another recently realised Puff Daddy and P Diddy were the same person. The mistakes encouraged increasingly basic admissions about animals, food, names and familiar phrases.
Chris was away for the day after the Annie Mac embarrassment, according to Scott, although he had already been scheduled to be off. His own Twitter crisis involved running out of toilet roll and then failing to post an update.
Looking for the necessities
The strongest misunderstanding came from a 22-year-old woman who had been singing “The Bare Necessities” while sitting on the toilet. Only then did she realise “bare” meant simple rather than the animal.
Until that moment, she believed bears possessed a body part or object called their “necessities”. The song instructed people to look for it, although she had never established where on a bear anybody should search.
Writing out the two meanings finally made the pun clear. Scott repeatedly played the song and imagined her inspecting an animal in the hope that finding its necessities would make her happy. She worried that the explanation had now ruined The Jungle Book for everybody else.
Christmas arrives in March
Chris’s absence gave Scott the opportunity to open the programme’s post for the first time since November. The pile contained a Christmas Radio Times, old magazines, drinks and numerous cards.
One listener had entrusted Scott with delivering Christmas cards to other Radio 1 presenters. Unsurprisingly, he had failed. Another had supplied a stamped envelope and asked him to sign a 2014 card for her boyfriend. Scott changed the printed four into a five and proposed returning it in time for Christmas 2015, assuming the couple were still together.
He thanked everybody for the gifts and promised to open the next collection in approximately four months. The delayed gratitude was sincere, even if none of it remained seasonally useful.
Henry VIII returns
Gary Lucy and Greg James played Real or No Real. Sean Paul genuinely competed in water polo as a teenager, and Scott had once spent a Red Nose Day bowling with pop stars.
Henry VIII returned after Thursday’s football-boot fact. He really did lose a ceremonial wrestling match against Francis I of France during celebrations around a peace treaty. Scott and Greg converted the Tudor king into a football chant again, extending a historical theme which had unexpectedly occupied two consecutive programmes.
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