Scott and the team play back a selection of the week’s most bizarre and awkward voicemail messages left on the Flirt Divert answerphone, including someone confessing they thought the caller was “disgusting looking” and a message that bears a suspicious resemblance to Mike Skinner from The Streets.
This episode is built around Flirt Divert, the show’s interactive feature where listeners leave voicemail messages for each other on 03700 774914. Scott introduces a collection of the week’s strangest and most memorable messages, each one showcasing the unfiltered chaos of drunk late-night calls and romantic (or romantic-adjacent) attempts.
The messages range from the genuinely cruel — one woman leaving a message explicitly telling someone she thought they were “disgusting looking” and asking them not to call back — to the oddly endearing. One caller starts aggressive and cockney before shifting into an unexpectedly camp tone. Another message features someone using the distinctly 1970s phrase “feeling randy,” prompting the team to wonder if anyone still uses that particular expression.
A running gag throughout involves a message about someone apparently buying a raccoon with another person’s credit card online. The team joke about whether this is actually possible, eventually revealing through research that raccoons are actually illegal to buy and sell — though they do exist as a brand of hair extensions, which may have been the actual purchase in question.
The highlight comes when Scott plays a message that sounds remarkably like Mike Skinner from The Streets, complete with his characteristic delivery and a romantic pitch involving McDonald’s (“Big Mac and fries… maybe we could even go large”). The show wraps up with a clarification segment where Scott helps clear up some confusion about previous messages and their actual meanings.
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