“I was ready to press the button and give us some Mariah.”
“It’s a bit of a rogue one actually, Scott…”
“Teachers do happen in a classroom!”

Christmas Creepers, Nativity Chaos & a Burning Wheat Bag

Scott arrived full of festive temptation, openly admitting he’d nearly gone early on Mariah yesterday: “I was so ready to press the button and give us some Mariah.” Immediately the listeners were split — the Christmas Creepers vs the December Purists — and Scott relished fanning the flames.

Producer Jeff had warned him off festive tunes until December, but listeners were pleading, and Scott knew he had the power to cause national scenes at 6.40am. This Christmas tree discourse lit up the texts: “Scott, let’s not ruin this beautiful friendship by playing Christmas songs before December!”

Meanwhile poor Ellie re-entered the studio smelling faintly of an arson investigation.

🔥 Ellie Brennan Sets Fire to Her House (Accidentally)

Ellie returned after a few days off and immediately apologised for the smoky atmosphere. She’d tried to heat her stone-cold house using one of those microwavable wheat bags, but left it in too long:
“All the wheat is burning. It was smoking. It was a disaster. And now I stink.”
Scott described the lingering scent as “fields of wheat,” while Ellie confessed she’d binned the scorched wheat bag outside and emptied Sally Traffic’s dry shampoo attempting to disguise the smell.

Tina Dehealy entered moments later, bewildered: “Are you okay? No wheat bag action this morning for me.”
Cue a discussion about “roster” vs “rota,” because nothing wakes you up like semantics and smoke inhalation.

🎭 Nativity Season Takes Over the Nation

Listeners were bursting with nativity stories today — teachers, parents and traumatised ex-Marys everywhere.

Rosie the Teacher (Warrington)

Rosie had been rehearsing all night with her Year 5s and told Scott:
“It’s a bit of a rogue one actually… songs about Christmas dinner and snowmen and Santa.”
Her show even features the “star of Bethlehem being the star of the show,” and Scott was living for it.

Tina’s Athena

Scott asked Tina if her daughter had her role yet. She does. And it’s iconic:
“She is snowflake narrator number two.”
Tina: “We have to make our own costumes.”
Scott: “I was always narrator… too shy to be Jesus.”
Ellie was also always narrator and once applied to be a non-speaking makeup artist — a role that didn’t exist.

Best Listener Roles Today

Nothing beats the annual nativity casting chaos:

• “My five-year-old came home and told me he was a chicken in the nativity.”

• “I was a church mouse, told to hide behind the piano.”

• “I was seven swans a-swimming… then eight maids a-milking threw up behind me.”

• “I was a stick of rhubarb.”

• “I was Elvis Presley: ‘You looking for a king, pretty little lady?’”

Scott was thriving.

💌 Fan Mail Returns: The Briggs Family of Worthing

A genuine letter arrived in the post — a rarity Scott treated like a holy relic.

The Briggs family wrote about how Scott can “turn even the most ordinary moments into something entertaining.” They enclosed a radiator bleed key, perfectly timed for Ellie’s heating disasters.
The letter advised: “Righty tighty and lefty loosey.”

Ellie immediately cancelled her order for one. Tina laughed at the idea of Scott wielding tools. The key is now officially part of the Breakfast Show lore.

🐊 The Easiest Quiz – Chaos Edition

Susie from Edinburgh played the quiz from a cupboard at work, accompanied by her manager Tony who kept whisper-pleading: “Please… please…”

The standout wrong-but-kind-of-right moment:

Q: “What happens in a classroom?”
A: “Teachers.”
Scott nearly melted: “Teachers do happen in a classroom.”
Even Tina agreed the logic checked out.

Susie smashed 15 points, Tony became a national treasure, and Scott now claims to have Tony “on a button.”

🎬 Kids Review Wicked: For Good

Forget the newspapers — Scott got the real critics: the under-10s.

• Mabel: “Everyone should see it; it’s amazing.”

• Tabitha (10): “I cried a little bit.”

• Sky: “My favourite bit was when Glinda and Elphaba were fighting.”

• Oshin: “Ten out of ten.”

• Alfie in Basingstoke: “I loved Wicked for good.”

Scott warned Cynthia Erivo and Ariana Grande: “Don’t doom-scroll. The real reviews are here.”

🎄 Mariah Watch: It Finally Happened

The listeners overruled Jeff. Tony said yes. Kids begged.
And at 8.13am, history happened.

Scott pressed the button.

Mariah’s “All I Want for Christmas Is You” blasted across the nation.

Scott shouted: “It’s Christmaaaaaaaaan!”
Listeners cried in cars. Kirsty the ex-donkey rejoiced. Ellie planned mulled cider.

This marks the official start of the Christmas season on the Breakfast Show.

👑 Gloria Hunniford: Scam Safe Week Special

Gloria arrived like broadcasting royalty, applying lipstick live because “it helps you speak better on the radio.” Scott immediately adopted the rule.

She revealed she was once scammed herself — an untouched savings account targeted through the dark web — and warned that “AI fake sailors” are now a real scam trend.
Her advice:

• never act on cold calls

• close the door

• ring your bank directly

• “take half an hour and check everything”

🎂 Birthday Game

Jane from West Yorkshire finally got through on her third attempt — live from holiday in Anglesey with a 10am checkout looming.

She rejected Vanilla Ice’s Ice Ice Baby (painful) and landed on Wamdue Project – King of My Castle.
Listeners were outraged in the fun way.

Jane left happy though — and her fish in the car survived the wait.